To take my 2 year old to work tomorrow?

[IceCreamMum]

I’m a single mum and I don’t have any other choice as the childcare I had arranged for tomorrow has just fallen through now. I don’t know how my boss will react to me just turning up with DD, I can’t ask him as he’s not answering his phone and he won’t see my email until tomorrow morning when it will be too late anyway. I’m a member of senior management (Head of Department at a Zoo) and unfortunately I can’t work from home tomorrow, I have to be on the site tomorrow one way or another due to work commitments. Would I be unreasonable to take DD to work with me tomorrow? I don’t have any other option whatsoever and I also don’t have anyone else that I can ask for childcare this late either.

Im guessing the OP hasn’t heard of that wonderful invention - the Zoom meeting!

My thoughts too.

A senior staff member where I used to work would either attend electronically or pass notes off to their deputy.

It's a meeting.

You have no option, as you say, and I doubt whether you would be fired over this.
I would take her and apologise.
Pack lots of water and healthy snacks, a sleeping bag and either reins and lead or a large bush walking backpack child sling so that you can have ultimate control over wher your DD is at all times.
I would also pack nappy bags and take all nappies home rather than leaving any in the work place bin..
By lunch time you will have your answer as to what you should do in the future under similar circumstances.

DD sounds much too young for this. If you were seriously ill or in an accident you would need time off tomorrow. It’s unfortunate but the same thing.

I’ve managed to find a colleague to look after her during the meeting! I can’t get hold of my boss still though so I’m going to just go in this morning with DD and explain and then ask if he wants me to stay for the whole day or just for the meeting.

And regarding an emergency nanny that people suggested, no way am I leaving my DD with someone I’ve never met for the whole day!

😂

Honestly though, I am struggling to imagine what kind of meeting couldn’t possibly be taken on by another colleague!

I am a lawyer and I once had a judge refuse my oppositions request to postpone a four day trial on medical grounds (the poor guy has a breakdown)… at 16:30 the night before… they ended up sending someone who had no idea what the case was even about and it was horrendous. I’m glad that judge retired because the lack of empathy was astounding!

What a great idea!

They only have so many staff. So if they all come down with this vile flu that my whole family has then it can’t open can it? Parents will get refunded. Nursery staff can also get ill (although they have strong immune systems I imagine which means this is probably rare!)

I definitely remember the nursery mine were in partially closing once for this reason.

I'm guessing you didn't read that OP stated the meeting can't be done remotely.

An older child or teenager sat someone where thry just need the odd check fine, a 2yo no that is not fair

Sure if you are friends with someone who does it then fine but then as much as talking to a 2yo is cute i go to work to concentrate at work not having a toddler come up to me

It's in the OP!

She works in a zoo. Read the post!!!

People saying this kind of thing clearly don't, or never have, worked in places where that would be unsafe or unsuitable.

In my previous role, I managed therapists. One of the contractors was fired on the spot for turning up on screen with a client with a toddler on their lap. So many reasons why that was very not ok for a therapist to do.

The sites we send our clinical trainers to where I work now are often hospitals. I'd love to see a surgeon turn up with a 2 y o child, put them in scrubs and demand the rest of the team just gets on with it!

Both of those pieces of information were shared in her post...

Interesting thread.
In my line of work going for the most crucial part and taking the child with you would be seen as reasonable balance in such situation.

Yes, technically you are entitled to emergency leave, but you are an adult and can evaluate whether rescheduling/going without you is better or worse for the company than having you there with the child.

@IceCreamMum you wouldn't need to leave your daughter with an emergency nanny for a whole day. It could be for the few hours of the meeting. They could go round the zoo!
This is precisely what emergency Nannies are for.

If you're saying 'no way would I use one,' then fine, your call. But don't pretend you have no option but to take your kid to work. Be honest that there are options but not ones you choose to use

I don't imagine Emergency Nannies come cheap or that jobs in zoos pay particularly well. Maybe, having paid for the Nursery already, the OP just hasn't got the spare money.

Glad you’ve got it sorted, to a certain extent.

My granddaughter’s nursery had to close for a couple of days last year because the majority of staff got Covid.

This is exactly what dependency leave is for. Emergencies when childcare falls through.

You're legally allowed to take this. Your boss cannot refuse as its a legitimate childcare emergency.

You are legally entitled to unpaid, emergency leave for urgent childcare.

But I think having a trusted colleague watch her for the meeting then WFH for the rest of the day is a really solid compromise and I would hope your work would be reasonable given the circumstances. TBH,.as they legally have to let you have the day off if they cannot accommodate you, I would hope they would be thankful that you arranged a good emergency solution!

Exactly. This is mumsnet where everyone works in an office or similar. Everyone should be working from home. Children and dogs should be fine to be brought to work if WFH can't be done one day. All colleagues would be so happy to look after the child while they work. Etc etc. It's just not the real world. Obviously it sounds like in the OPs job it could be possible. But everyone on here always says things like "EVERYONE" used to bring kids to work years ago. "ALL Workplaces should be much more child friendly"
In most jobs it's just not possible. I work in a medical setting. I can't have a 2 year old climbing on me or causing havoc touching medical stuff in my room while I'm trying to give someone who's scared an injection. And no one in the surgery could watch them for me either for the same reasons. Reception couldn't obviously either as they need to actually talk to patients.

I guarantee the people that say they should be allowed to bring their children to work are the same people that would be horrified if they turned up to a teacher meeting to discuss they child and the teacher had their 2 year old with them causing chaos. Or they went to a hospital appointment with their elderly parent to discuss hospice care and the doctor had their 2 kids playing shops in the corner of the room.

Sitters.co.UK have childcare you can book ad hoc.

Everyone is saying the op has been told where to find a babysitter. But depending when she found out nursery had closed and what time she has to be at work it may not be possible to get an answer!

If you can't get your boss or find a sitter you know (I wouldn't want to use a stranger in this situation either) then taking her with you and explaining you're happy to stay for the meeting and x will watch her seems like the best way to try and meet everyone's need. Your work can always tell you to reschedule if they're not happy with that.

Having backup plans for childcare is a basic parenting responsibility.

As to not leaving the child with a stranger, that is why one does trial runs. For goodness sake, I had my dog spend a trial night with a backup pet sitter to see how it went, in case I needed help. And indeed when my regular sitter was unavailable, a few months later, my dog happily spent a week with his new friend while I was on holiday.

Establishing these resources before an emergency arises is the prudent thing to do.

But that's irrelevant because the OP doesn't work as a therapist or in a dangerous or unsuitable environment.