Being so jealous of this family

[Gryunbjj]

I don’t know where it comes from but it bothers me. They go to a state school with my son and are constantly going on lavish holidays, they have a 2 million house (righmove check confirmed), they always appear impeccable and without fault. I don’t understand and it bugs me.

Yet you're jealous of them, you are the one with the issues, not them

No, I know the point – you can’t exist on Mumsnet and not be aware of that old chestnut. It’s a fallacy that the state education system would or should be degraded by the 7% of children in private education. It exists to serve the nation, whether it serves 93% of children or 100% of children. If all privately educated children were to suddenly disband into state schools, they would take, on average, 30 children per school.

Someone isn’t ‘selfish’ because they don’t believe in social segregation.

There's always someone with more than you and always someone with less than you. The important thing is being a nice person. Are they nice people?

This is what I tell my kids OP.

I think most people must know people like this. I think it’s it’s sad that people can’t just enjoy their lives without posting it all on SM like they have a point to prove. Are they really enjoying living in the moment when they’re constantly updating Facebook/Instagram with it? No one is benefitting from them doing so. Is their life really all “that”? They must be very insecure people and it’s unfortunately likely to rub off on their children which is unfair.

Teach your child that it’s their personality that matters and how they treat people, not what stuff they have in life. No point in concerning yourself with things that you can’t change just enjoy the life that you have.

Stop listening to gossip from others. So what if they are proud of their house, sounds like you would be too. You’re not sound very nice about this family and letting your envy breed resentment, which means you’re listening and participating in mean gossip. You’re the one coming across as materialistic as all you mention is the size of their house and their clothes

@samarrange It’s called “I need your love - is that true” by Byron Katie. You can also look up Byron Katie “The work” which is her method.

https://www.awesomebooks.com/book/9780307345301/i-need-your-love-is-that-true/used?gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAADocATBXq6qYGH2kbPBI3_G2GEbH1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIjMCR_t-cigMVqjoGAB0TiDAMEAQYAyABEgK1MvD_BwE

Also highly recommend

Surely you're not jealous of people who show off their house in this way , including a child in the photo as an incidental ?

I think their child would love to come round to yours .

I can help. We are in the £2M bracket (not incl the house). Kids go to state schools (primary) as we want to give them a grounded upbringing. At secondary, it’s either grammar schools or private.

You sound almost like you disapprove of them state educating their kids?! Like they 'shouldn't have' because now they are there in a state school having the nerve to have obviously more money than you, right in front if you! 🤣

OP you seem wildly jealous. They have more money than you, precisely what else have they done wrong?

Same here!
Why bother if one can afford a good independent school?

Ah, op. So Cliquey just means they have friends, and the aspects of their house is what you focus on.

being envious only harms you. I’m sorry you were too embarassed to invite back and are struggling, the issue isn’t them, it is they have what you want.

Sounds like it was nice of them to invite your kid over. As others have said they might have other problems you have no idea of. And they can't help being considerably richer than yaaw

Goodness. She didn’t even mention social media.

Loads of money!!!!

So... You take offence in them dressing their children nicely and making an effort with their appearance?!
It all comes back to the same issue really doesnt it.... Yes they buy more expensive clothes, they can afford to, they have more money than you. Yes they are nicely turned out, they can afford more haircuts, beauty treatments etc... Because they have more money than you.
Should they be actively trying to look a bit shit to make you feel better OP?

But that’s not their fault that’s your insecurities. My daughter has a friend who has a huge house , tennis court , pool. I do wonder when the child comes to our perfectly nice four bed detached what she thinks but that’s more from a sense of curiosity than envy.

this is a real time for self reflection op , work on what is affecting you, why are you so bothered by them? You will interact with loads of people who have more money than you.

They could shuffle to the school to drop kids off dressed in a grubby pink dressing gown and pyjamas and slippers.

Because being envious is fine it’s a feeling that a lot of us can relate to . But pushing behaviours on them ie they want to be the best as the op is doing is just a bit nasty. That’s why. It’s op’s lack of emotional maturity that’s being commented on.

It’s a bit rich to call someone materialistic (which is an opinion you formed through fodder from the gossip mill, not actual experience) when you are the one who took time and energy to google their house price.

Gangstas or mafia as neither work

There are so many rich people in the world, it's time to face the reality.😐

Of course they are 😂😂😂

Not cool. they may have inherited money or have a wealthy family.

Seriously your obsession is worrying. Step back and move on. Live and let live.

I think posters are being unfair themselves. I’ve asked for help/advice here. I don’t think many people have show kindness here, yet are judging me for doing the same!