Being so jealous of this family

[Gryunbjj]

I don’t know where it comes from but it bothers me. They go to a state school with my son and are constantly going on lavish holidays, they have a 2 million house (righmove check confirmed), they always appear impeccable and without fault. I don’t understand and it bugs me.

You are judging them very harshly, it doesn't matter what they have, are they decent, kind people and is their son a good friend to your son? If the answer to this is yes then invite the son over.
Just because they have money doesn't mean they are judgemental. The majority of people live in normal houses and have an OK standard of living. They might understand and appreciate they are very fortunate.
In addition you know nothing about what goes on in their lives, things are very rarely ever as they appear on the surface.

You're jealous of them, but seem to be inferring you somehow look down on them because of their external appearance etc.
This is inverted snobbery.

Exactly
Op, people like you scare me. Your posts are filled with bitterness and resentment for people who are strangers
I honestly cannot understand why people spend precious time actively envying people.
That time could be spent improving their own circumstances
Jealousy is a horrible spirit in that it can cause seemingly ‘nice’ people to behave in a nasty manner and do things to harm the object of their intense jealousy . Sad

"Some people have plenty of money and they spend it on nice things.
They're doing it to upset me, aren't they."

😳

OP, you're going to find life very difficult if you carry on like this.

This is similar to my situation and I’d give the house back in a heartbeat.

I have actually been wary of having new friends/DC friends to our house for fear of them having the OP’s reaction and making judgements about us with no idea of the circumstances. Hoped I was being overly cautious but apparently some people do think like this…

I think you need to grow up OP. Do you think they are the only people in the world with more money than you? How about concentrating on what you have, rather than what you haven't.

So, you want them to sell their house and downsize. Wear budget brand clothing. And, go on budget holidays. Even though they can afford more?

So, essentially, you just want them to live very frugally and ever increase their spare bank balance in order that you don’t feel they are better than you? If they don’t spend money they obviously have, their only other option would be to squirrel it away and die with it sitting in the bank. All just to make you somehow feel better because then they won’t have better things than you. Do you see how insane that is?

I think it's sad you look down on them. Even the children. It's not their fault they were not born poor.

I think you should return the playdate. This a chip on your shoulder. I mean they haven’t actually done anything to you. They have a nice house and dress well. It’s hardly awful is it? I’m a scruff, my kid is a scruff and my husband is a bit more tidy but we are nice people and friendly to everyone. I’d be really disappointed if someone decided they don’t like me on the basis of my appearance and not anything I’ve actually done or said.

When my dh was eleven he went to a school friends house and it was massive and beautiful.

A couple, of days later he decided he wanted that life so he asked his friend what his dad did and then he started working hard at school. His mother says he went from the bottom of the class to the top.

Now, he has that job. We have a lovely life. Dh is in New York at this very moment for work. He is incredibly ambitious.

There is no reason why you shouldn't improve your own prospects if you want to.

And there's no reason why your own children shouldn't look incredibly groomed.

Have you never Rightmove-stalked anybody? It's such fun!

Are they nice people?

It's pathetic to sit at home looking up things about other people's lives and feeding envy. Get a life, focus on your own life and being a nicer person.

They probably are.

Lol. I'm not a planner. I just work for one. I see all the information for hundreds of clients & would never, ever, break that trust. My DB says everything himself, to the entire family. It's just their own perception from what they see outwards. DB isn't pretentious at all & has, in fact, told our DF exactly what I told you as he knows some of my info as well.

Yes, some people are rich, some aren't -but don't make assumptions - the simple family to your left at the school gate might be richer or happier than the one on your right. My comment was to not judge, or assume, either way, based on appearances.

So, in essence, you are merely jealous and petty, and given to make assumptions about this family based on your petty jealousy.
Nice

Yes you can. You are an adult and can modify your minset and attitude.
Just takes a bit of effort and humanity

They are taxed more regardless of what state resources they use or don’t use.

You are totally missing the point. Of more resources are needed to support state education then additional taxes should be levied on wealthier people whose state schools not those who subsidise them by using Independent schools.

Thanks @HoppityBun for being kind.

You're being silly OP. I earn £29k which is our total household income and we live in a council flat and I really don't care how much money other people have. Sure, I'd like to have more money myself but that's no one else's fault. It's just a waste of time envying people.

For those who have asked for more details.
the parents are very cliquey and another parent mentioned that they’re very materialistic. When having to send in pics of their kids for various school pics they always have to include aspects of their house rather than what most other parents do and just send a pic focused on their kid. These are some examples.

If that's a lifestyle you want, then use your energy to focus on how to achieve it.

But who cares???? It doesn't matter to you what they do.

Someone once told me that you can't 'just have the holidays and money' if you are jealous you have to take everything.....and most people in that situation would rather have e their own life! Don't be jealous. I expect there have been hurts along the way.