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AIBU?

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Original poster

Adult child has to make their bed before going to work

183 replies

jtyy5 · 09/12/2024 17:42

It is my parents house so I follow their rules and I have no intention of bringing this up.

I am 24 and live with my parents, it is a house rule that I have to make my bed before going to work.

Is this a silly rule or setting a good example?

OP posts:
Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:13

godmum56 · 09/12/2024 20:11

I don't know how you can look yourself in the eye.

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It’s fine I never wear my glasses either so I don’t have too.

Always breaking the rules me.

BrightonFrock · 09/12/2024 20:13

It's a good idea because you come home to a nice tidy bedroom, and if the door is open and someone glances in, it looks neat.

“Glance in”? 🤔 Why would anyone do that?

I wonder if these glancers are the same people who claim they just happened to be walking past their partner’s phone at the exact moment a message came up and they “couldn’t help” seeing it…

BrightonFrock · 09/12/2024 20:15

Glitchymn1 · 09/12/2024 19:59

🤣 “Controlling” - it’s their house, not making the bed is bloody downright lazy! Jesus Christ. Leave it to air whilst you have breakfast and hopefully shower.

And yes, if the door was closed I’d be in there because it’s my house and I want all the beds made.

If it bothers you, move out.

Why? Why on earth would it bother you that a bed you don’t sleep in isn’t made? It’s crackers!

Yikesthathurt · 09/12/2024 20:30

GildedRage · 09/12/2024 18:12

Air the room with an open window x1 ht. Tidy the bed linen, depending on bedding used, it should be neat looking (duvet up or down, quilt no quilt, throw no throw etc means variations). Pillows fluffed and positioned at the head of the bed.
My children made their beds from 5 onward, I would fully expect a young adult to do the same.
Tidy beds sets the tone for the rest of the home.
Are you neurodiverse? Because tidying a bedroom child or adult is basic similar to changing into clothing vs staying in pj’s.
It’s also respectful to the rest of the household.

🤣

Allfur · 09/12/2024 20:32

Very controlling, your space is your space

ItIsEverywhere · 09/12/2024 20:33

I would be shocked if my parents had gone into my room to check if my bed was made once I was a grown-up.

House rules are fine, but the state of your own bedroom should be up to you.

HolyPeaches · 09/12/2024 20:42

I think as long as you keep your room tidy and hygienic - I.e no rubbish left out, bins are emptied regularly, it’s well ventilated to stop mould, you dust and vacuum, and no plates/cups/glasses left in there. - you parents have absolutely no right to enter your space or dictate that you should make your bed.

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:43

HolyPeaches · 09/12/2024 20:42

I think as long as you keep your room tidy and hygienic - I.e no rubbish left out, bins are emptied regularly, it’s well ventilated to stop mould, you dust and vacuum, and no plates/cups/glasses left in there. - you parents have absolutely no right to enter your space or dictate that you should make your bed.

Bins in bedrooms? What kind of rubbish does a bedroom have.

Birchlarch · 09/12/2024 20:44

I've come to report back that I have discovered that i did not make my bed today.

I was able to fully function as an adult in a responsible job. Drove to work and everything. No one popped in or glanced in to the room. Dh hasn't even noticed.

Birchlarch · 09/12/2024 20:45

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:43

Bins in bedrooms? What kind of rubbish does a bedroom have.

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I have teenagers. Sweet wrappers, cans, earbuds, cotton wool.

Growlybear83 · 09/12/2024 20:46

Surely all adults make their beds once they've got up and dressed? The vast majority of people have duvets nowadays rather than sheets, blankets, and bedspreads, so it's hardly time consuming.

SweetBobby · 09/12/2024 20:47

Birchlarch · 09/12/2024 20:45

I have teenagers. Sweet wrappers, cans, earbuds, cotton wool.

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More fool you for putting up with it. You're not doing them any favours.

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:48

Birchlarch · 09/12/2024 20:45

I have teenagers. Sweet wrappers, cans, earbuds, cotton wool.

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Ah I make mine bring it down. If I gave them a bin it would end up overflowing 😅

I was thinking of my adult bedroom like why would I need a bin.

Cherrysoup · 09/12/2024 20:50

Move out! I air the bed literally all day. Making it is trapping all the sweaty humid air in it.

Birchlarch · 09/12/2024 20:53

SweetBobby · 09/12/2024 20:47

More fool you for putting up with it. You're not doing them any favours.

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Putting up with what? They eat stuff, they put rubbish in their bins. They bring their own bins out to the big bin on bin day and make sure they recycle their plastic etc. They clean and hoover their own rooms. I just do the shouting.

kiraric · 09/12/2024 20:56

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:48

Ah I make mine bring it down. If I gave them a bin it would end up overflowing 😅

I was thinking of my adult bedroom like why would I need a bin.

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We have bins in every room - our bedroom bin doesn't fill up fast but does have a use. Things like - you use up your deodorant or something or you take the labels off a new piece of clothing. We don't eat or drink upstairs so it's nothing messy.

Icanttakethisanymore · 09/12/2024 20:58

GreenEggs483 · 09/12/2024 19:29

It's in how we read things I think. I also think the whole thing hinges on the relationship OP has with her parents and the reason why it's important to them that the bed is made. Who knows, maybe they're putting the house on the market and want it fit for viewing, maybe there are younger siblings who are learning the ropes. I think OP hasn't been back so perhaps we'll never know.

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Yes true, as others have asked; is the relationship otherwise good? Makes all the difference to whether or not this is an issue.

godmum56 · 09/12/2024 21:12

Growlybear83 · 09/12/2024 20:46

Surely all adults make their beds once they've got up and dressed? The vast majority of people have duvets nowadays rather than sheets, blankets, and bedspreads, so it's hardly time consuming.

😂

godmum56 · 09/12/2024 21:14

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:43

Bins in bedrooms? What kind of rubbish does a bedroom have.

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cotton wool, clothes labels, empty deoderant cans and similar, tissues. Its only a small bin but why would you not have one?

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 21:17

godmum56 · 09/12/2024 21:14

cotton wool, clothes labels, empty deoderant cans and similar, tissues. Its only a small bin but why would you not have one?

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Because I don’t have any of that rubbish in my bedroom. Clothes labels removed in kitchen, empty deodorant again taken down, tissues down the toilet.

I grew up in a house that had bins in every room. All you could smell was bins. Put me off for life. All rubbish is taken straight out or a small one day only bag in the kitchen.

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 21:18

Oh and before the you don’t have teenage daughters. I do. She uses reusable before we get started there.

HolyPeaches · 09/12/2024 21:25

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 20:43

Bins in bedrooms? What kind of rubbish does a bedroom have.

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I always had a bin in my bedroom as a teen/young adult at home.

Snack wrappers went in there. Makeup wipes, empty bottles/cans of drink (before multiple recycling bins), tags and labels pulled off from new clothes. Lots of things.

Auburngal · 09/12/2024 21:32

When I was with my parents, teen, adult and when moved back to them for 2.5 years from ages of 26-29, I was not allowed to have any food in my bedroom. UNLESS I was too ill to get downstairs and sit up to a table.

godmum56 · 09/12/2024 21:33

Wellingtonspie · 09/12/2024 21:17

Because I don’t have any of that rubbish in my bedroom. Clothes labels removed in kitchen, empty deodorant again taken down, tissues down the toilet.

I grew up in a house that had bins in every room. All you could smell was bins. Put me off for life. All rubbish is taken straight out or a small one day only bag in the kitchen.

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flushing tissues is not a good idea. Seriously. Tissues are designed to stay intact when wet so you don't get a handful of snot. Toilet roll is designed to separate when wet so it doesn't bung up the sewer. I don't remove clothes labels until i have tried them on and I do that in my bedroom. In my house the bedroom and bathroom bins do not smell.
home.howstuffworks.com/toilet-paper-tissue-difference.htm

Auburngal · 09/12/2024 21:34

HolyPeaches · 09/12/2024 21:25

I always had a bin in my bedroom as a teen/young adult at home.

Snack wrappers went in there. Makeup wipes, empty bottles/cans of drink (before multiple recycling bins), tags and labels pulled off from new clothes. Lots of things.

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Empty medication tablet strips, pens that ran out, screwed up notes/drafts of home/coursework.