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Dh making us drive in red warning

602 replies

BlueFoxel · 06/12/2024 21:00

It just so happens dh and I have been on the Welsh coast for the past few days enjoying a mini break before our wedding. Was sent the emergency alarm earlier today. We are due to set off tomorrow morning in the middle of the red warning for wind. I have shared my concerns with dh but he really does not care at all. Dh thinks I am dramatic at the best of times and has totally dismissed my fears. He has a football game he is wanting to drive back home for. He is very arrogant

I am really bloody stressed out.

Please tell me I am being crazy and everything will be fine.

OP posts:
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PyongyangKipperbang · 06/12/2024 23:02

Where in Wales? DD is in Aberystwyth. She and her Uni friends who are literally on the sea front are all camping out with mates in their accomodation up the hill away from the centre. They are in the centre of the red zone. Apparently it is very weirdly quiet. Her landlady said its like it was in Covid, no one is out at all.

Hibernating80 · 06/12/2024 23:02

It's unfair on the emergency services who have to respond to people that ignore the advice. There are lots of people cancelling their plans. We had to cancel something we were really looking forward to, and even the kids can understand and accept its too risky to travel.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 06/12/2024 23:04

We were in Wales once in a similar situation. Drove back the night before we originally planned because timings were similar (ie the warning was for later that night and in the morning).

Got over the bridge before they closed it - and close it they did - and home in time to tie down the trampoline (we no longer have one as it happens). We’d have been stranded otherwise as we were in a holiday lodge.

Hopikins · 06/12/2024 23:05

Get yourself to safety and CANCEL the wedding.

Falseshamrok · 06/12/2024 23:06

grumpygrape · 06/12/2024 21:03

Why are you marrying him ?

Probably because she knows other things about him than you, and doesn’t base it all on a weather report??

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 06/12/2024 23:10

I don't suppose you will, but on the off chance you do find your voice and act on your voice and check into a travelodge - they allow upto 2 dogs per room.
I believe it's £20 per dog per stay.

How did you both manage to miss all the weather reports and news today ? I've known since yesterday.

Coldiron · 06/12/2024 23:13

Please don’t ever have children with this man.

Can you imagine if it wasn’t his or your life that he was putting at risk but your childrens? And you could never leave him because then he would have the kids 50% of the time without you there to mitigate his recklessness?

PickAChew · 06/12/2024 23:13

IkeaJesusChrist · 06/12/2024 22:22

Sure but that leaves the east, south east and the north etc.

It does indeed. Behold all the yellow. We're forecast wind gusts over 60mph in the Northeast tomorrow afternoon and evening.

Dh making us drive in red warning
Foundanotherwrinkle · 06/12/2024 23:17

PyongyangKipperbang · 06/12/2024 23:02

Where in Wales? DD is in Aberystwyth. She and her Uni friends who are literally on the sea front are all camping out with mates in their accomodation up the hill away from the centre. They are in the centre of the red zone. Apparently it is very weirdly quiet. Her landlady said its like it was in Covid, no one is out at all.

So they're in the red zone, everyone else has the sense to stay home and they decided to go camping?? Wow, you clearly no longer need brains to go to uni these days. Haven't heard anything this irresponsible for a long time.

WhatterySquash · 06/12/2024 23:17

If you're going to marry this bloke now is the time to show him you're not a pushover and him thinking he knows it all doesn't get prioritised over common sense. The warnings are there for a reason and they are hardly ever red.

Tell him no, the official advice is to stay put and that's what you will be doing along with dogs. If he objects, point out he sees fit to tell you what to do, going against an official warning. If he wants to go he can go, though the wedding may well be off if a tree's landed on him.

Say. No. Somewhere in your head you have absorbed (from him) the idea that he's the boss. He's not, and since he's bloody stupid, if anyone should be the decision-maker it's you. This is your and your dogs' life at risk. Don't stand for it.

Merryoldgoat · 06/12/2024 23:18

PyongyangKipperbang · 06/12/2024 23:02

Where in Wales? DD is in Aberystwyth. She and her Uni friends who are literally on the sea front are all camping out with mates in their accomodation up the hill away from the centre. They are in the centre of the red zone. Apparently it is very weirdly quiet. Her landlady said its like it was in Covid, no one is out at all.

Camping?!

IcecreamWhatSandwich · 06/12/2024 23:19

A lot of the people commenting on whether OP should still marry her fiancé are missing or ignoring a basic fact about situations like this:

Most men do stuff like this all the time. Most (straight) men act like this with their partners. Most men believe that this is an appropriate way to treat their female partners. Most men have been taught or decided for themselves that a woman's feelings about a situation like this should not be taken seriously, let alone followed.

Some are not like this, but the vast majority are.

Women do not marry men like this one because they want to be treated like this. They get married because they want to be in a conventional relationship and family. And they marry men like this because that is what is out there.

"Do you want to live your life being told you’re overly dramatic? Do you want to be with someone who minimises your fears? Do you want to continually be told that your feelings don’t matter?"

If all women regarded their options in this way, there would be very few marriages, long-term heterosexual relationships or traditional nuclear families.

You might think that this is a good thing. But you should acknowledge, when you talk about OP's relationship in these terms, what you're actually advocating: lesbianism, single parenthood, or celibacy. Again, nothing wrong with those choices. But don't imply or suggest that she should drop her current partner but is likely to find another man whose outlook will be completely different.

There are only so many men who meet the standards being implied here (even though the standards of basic decency and consideration of one's life partner are not very high).

MrsTerryPratchett · 06/12/2024 23:19

So they're in the red zone, everyone else has the sense to stay home and they decided to go camping?? Wow, you clearly no longer need brains to go to uni these days. Haven't heard anything this irresponsible for a long time.

I assume she means camping out as in staying with. Not literally camping.

PrimalLass · 06/12/2024 23:19

So they're in the red zone, everyone else has the sense to stay home and they decided to go camping?? Wow, you clearly no longer need brains to go to uni these days. Haven't heard anything this irresponsible for a long time.

You haven't read it properly.

PickAChew · 06/12/2024 23:19

Foundanotherwrinkle · 06/12/2024 22:57

Unless they're driving from Wales to the top end of Scotland the whole rest of the country is under some kind of warning

Ha! You posted the map already. I'm guessing the poster needed to see it. (and we seem to be quite close!)

allthatfalafel · 06/12/2024 23:19

Foundanotherwrinkle · 06/12/2024 23:17

So they're in the red zone, everyone else has the sense to stay home and they decided to go camping?? Wow, you clearly no longer need brains to go to uni these days. Haven't heard anything this irresponsible for a long time.

"camping out with mates in their accomodation" as in, they relocated inland to stay with their friends. Not actual camping.

WhatterySquash · 06/12/2024 23:19

I got the impression PP meant they are sleeping on friends' floors inland rather than stay in their own accommodation by the coast. Not actual camping.

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 06/12/2024 23:21

Whereabouts are you on the coast?

TheDowagerCountessofPembroke · 06/12/2024 23:21

Foundanotherwrinkle · 06/12/2024 23:17

So they're in the red zone, everyone else has the sense to stay home and they decided to go camping?? Wow, you clearly no longer need brains to go to uni these days. Haven't heard anything this irresponsible for a long time.

Yes in a tent!

Im guessing the poster meant they are all staying in one house.

MrsTerryPratchett · 06/12/2024 23:22

IcecreamWhatSandwich · 06/12/2024 23:19

A lot of the people commenting on whether OP should still marry her fiancé are missing or ignoring a basic fact about situations like this:

Most men do stuff like this all the time. Most (straight) men act like this with their partners. Most men believe that this is an appropriate way to treat their female partners. Most men have been taught or decided for themselves that a woman's feelings about a situation like this should not be taken seriously, let alone followed.

Some are not like this, but the vast majority are.

Women do not marry men like this one because they want to be treated like this. They get married because they want to be in a conventional relationship and family. And they marry men like this because that is what is out there.

"Do you want to live your life being told you’re overly dramatic? Do you want to be with someone who minimises your fears? Do you want to continually be told that your feelings don’t matter?"

If all women regarded their options in this way, there would be very few marriages, long-term heterosexual relationships or traditional nuclear families.

You might think that this is a good thing. But you should acknowledge, when you talk about OP's relationship in these terms, what you're actually advocating: lesbianism, single parenthood, or celibacy. Again, nothing wrong with those choices. But don't imply or suggest that she should drop her current partner but is likely to find another man whose outlook will be completely different.

There are only so many men who meet the standards being implied here (even though the standards of basic decency and consideration of one's life partner are not very high).

What a depressing post. DH isn't like this, and I'd much rather DD chose 'nothing' than 'something shit'.

I agree a lot of men are shit. The answer is for all of us to not shag them until they collectively sort their crap out. They are currently looking for each other's approval when they should be looking for ours.

High standards ladies!

CRD67 · 06/12/2024 23:22

Two red warnings. One for the weather, one for your future marriage.

thesilvermoon · 06/12/2024 23:23

“Stay indoors if you can. It is not safe to drive in these conditions.”

That's pretty clear.

PickAChew · 06/12/2024 23:23

IcecreamWhatSandwich · 06/12/2024 23:19

A lot of the people commenting on whether OP should still marry her fiancé are missing or ignoring a basic fact about situations like this:

Most men do stuff like this all the time. Most (straight) men act like this with their partners. Most men believe that this is an appropriate way to treat their female partners. Most men have been taught or decided for themselves that a woman's feelings about a situation like this should not be taken seriously, let alone followed.

Some are not like this, but the vast majority are.

Women do not marry men like this one because they want to be treated like this. They get married because they want to be in a conventional relationship and family. And they marry men like this because that is what is out there.

"Do you want to live your life being told you’re overly dramatic? Do you want to be with someone who minimises your fears? Do you want to continually be told that your feelings don’t matter?"

If all women regarded their options in this way, there would be very few marriages, long-term heterosexual relationships or traditional nuclear families.

You might think that this is a good thing. But you should acknowledge, when you talk about OP's relationship in these terms, what you're actually advocating: lesbianism, single parenthood, or celibacy. Again, nothing wrong with those choices. But don't imply or suggest that she should drop her current partner but is likely to find another man whose outlook will be completely different.

There are only so many men who meet the standards being implied here (even though the standards of basic decency and consideration of one's life partner are not very high).

OK. That makes it all OK, then. I mean, those poor men can't help being arrogant, useless twats and we shouldn't deprive them of sex on tap for it.

Roryno · 06/12/2024 23:24

mum11970 · 06/12/2024 21:59

They’ll be plenty of people with things they need to do. High winds aren’t unusual here. There will be a few hours up to around midday when they are expected to be extremely high, but 50-60 mph gusts are pretty common on the coast. Just wait and see what it’s like tomorrow.

High winds aren’t unusual here either. We learn to plan ahead and prepare. Weve just been out on our farm battoning down the hatches, just in case. If you can’t hold off doing things for a few hours it’s pathetic. I live in an area where mountain rescue have to go off and rescue numpties that think they know better. You’re not cool for thinking you know better. With a bit of luck it won’t be as bad as they say, but erring on the safe side is simply more sensible.

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 06/12/2024 23:24

The Aber students are staying with their friends up the hill rather than being on the Seafront which is totally sensible! Go Aber students!

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