Dh making us drive in red warning

[BlueFoxel]

It just so happens dh and I have been on the Welsh coast for the past few days enjoying a mini break before our wedding. Was sent the emergency alarm earlier today. We are due to set off tomorrow morning in the middle of the red warning for wind. I have shared my concerns with dh but he really does not care at all. Dh thinks I am dramatic at the best of times and has totally dismissed my fears. He has a football game he is wanting to drive back home for. He is very arrogant

I am really bloody stressed out.

Please tell me I am being crazy and everything will be fine.

Not being funny, but when on god's green earth will you ever need to light a fire or read a map?

You partner sounds like a tosser btw

https://www.pembrokeshire.gov.uk/situation-updates

Here is up to date information if you are in Pembrokeshire. Other Local Authorities will have the same.

Yet another wondering why the hell you are intending on marrying this arrogant moron. He doesn't seem to have any positives about him from what I'm reading.
He likes the sound of his own voice and being a complete dick to boot. Let him go home, you and the dogs do the right thing and stay put where you are safe.
When you and the dogs do get home seriously think about leaving this self important idiot. You shouldn't be together in any respect let alone marrying.
Thank god you don't have kids with him.

I think you need to think about why you want to marry a man who is arrogant, who dismisses your feelings and doesn’t care how you feel… these traits are not going to improve with time…

Op i haven't rtft only your updates, hope you stay safe. Just a word of warning based on this experience- if you ever have children with this man he will completely disregard any and all safety advice and you will be a nervous wreck.

100% this consider this a lucky escape

He sounds thick as shit. Does he not have access to that new fangled thing called the Internet? The bridges are both currently closed according to the Highways Agency website and the forecast says this storm will last another 24 hours at least. The bridges won’t open when there is a red weather warning. He’s a moron. All flights grounded from Bristol airport. Many many trains not running. Just looked on Wales online and hundreds of roads are shut. All my children’s football matches, rugby matches been cancelled as they don’t want families travelling.

I also think that you need to be having a serious chat with him. He is not the boss and if you're to get married, decisions are to be equal, he has to stop his assumption that he is automatically right.

Like my DH who tried to convince me to ‘climb in the back’ of the car, take our 6 month old out of the car seat and breastfeed him… whilst travelling at 70mph down a motorway.

Has he not looked out the window? Has he looked on the internet? He sounds fucking stupid.

If you bothered to read her other posts you'd see that she calls him her husband as they have been together for 10 years.
No thinking cap needed once OP replied.

Funny thing to even pick up on considering the more important issues.

He's a bit thick, isn't he? I'm in the red area of Wales. Even if you did set off, you won't get far. The M4 is closed in various places, both directions. Both bridges are closed and they'll be closed for a while - they close them when the winds aren't that bad, so in this case, they'll remain closed for the foreseeable.

All our local shops, council run buildings, matches, shows etc are all closed and cancelled. Even McDonald's.

The more I think about this, the more amusing it is that he thinks he's above everything else 😂

It’s never even occurred to me to learn how to light a fire or read a map! Why would you ever need those skills? It’s far more important to have common sense and not to be an arsehole than to have survival camping skills. Most average, intelligent people would think ‘there’s a red warning, we shouldn’t be driving’

I’m another one who seriously asks you what do you see in this arrogant, stupid man? Do you honestly believe that you will have a happy life with him constantly belittling you?

for the past few days enjoying a mini break before our wedding.

Are you married now. If not you can reconsider if he is already acting arrogant and selfish.

This thread must be a wind up.

Wow that's insane. And then there's all the guys who think it's perfectly fine to take a nap with their 2 week old baby wedged next to them on the couch.
Tbh this has made me appreciate my dp a bit more, he has many many many faults but basic health and safety luckily isn't one of them!!

Yes. Why marry a football twat, as a PP said.
Stupid match was probably cancelled already.

@BlueFoxel FWIW, if you marry him you will spend the rest of your life being spoken down to, gaslit and have your feelings and opinions completely minimised. You will be absolutely miserable and a shell of yourself. I would really consider if this is really how you want to spend the rest of your one and only life on this planet

OP, what's happening? Despite the tone of our posts we're worried about you. And your poor dogs. And even your stubborn twit of a fiancé.

You're dealing with a lifetime right now. Over-strict infantalising parents leaving you ill equipped for confident, independent adulthood, and now a man from the same familiar mould.

What we're used to, even if it's toxic, can have a strange comfort, and change can be scary. And for him too - if he's used to you in your passive box, you standing up for yourself will be unsettling him. And he may be doubling down and digging his heels in because he's rattled.

Are you at a crossroads of realising something HAS to change? The Sliding Doors analogy earlier was a good one - either you do THIS and all that comes with it - or you do THAT and there is change.

As you get older, he will get more like himself. There will be more of this - unless you change. And as women get older, our changes can disturb them.

Whatever happens today, you could spend some time listening to podcasts and videos on developing assertiveness!

Good luck. Keep us posted.

Tell him his match will have been cancelled - as have many other things - and if he keeps insisting on putting you both in danger the wedding’s off !!

Has op updated? I hope she's OK. We are in yellow, I've come out for a dc lesson and it's not pleasant the wind is shaking my care and rain lashing down. Strange odd flooding also ie not where it normally floods

I've met a few men in my time who would fixate on something like the football match and blindly ignore this weather warning. But if they wouldn't make it anyway with the diversion most of them would concede defeat and just stay another night. Only a couple are that thick and arrogant would travel anyway

His 'urgent' reason for travelling has now disappeared. If he makes you travel now then you really do have a problem on your hands, because that means he would put your life in danger purely to save face. It will mean protecting his ego overrides everything, so 'when' (if) you get back safely he will smugly say, 'See! I told you so!' and even if you don't, he will never ever admit it was the wrong decision.

@Smokesandeats reading a map is handy if you want to get anywhere you’re unfamiliar with.

And lighting a fire will be handy if you want to use your snazzy wood burner or fire place. There are plenty of houses where fires are the only source of heating, still. When the electric is down, your even your gas boiler can’t run so you don’t have heating and may find a fire handy.

I mean, he’s a pompous arse but those are pretty basic skills. Have they gone the same way as changing a plug or fuse?

Built into a cliff and exposed at the front sounds the opposite of safe. What if something falls on the roof or it floods at the front?

yes, they're things you do on middle class Scout residencies as a child and never do again.

i'd write more on this but i expect you won't have time to read as you'll need to saddle up your horse to head off to the market and buy some wartime spam.