Hoping that Greg Wallace is forgiven, rather than cancelled

[Toodaloo1567]

Just a few concerns about this whole GW thing. Caveat: I do not condone behaviour that is illegal.

1. It does kind of look like a whole bunch of privileged TV luvvies are clamouring to denounce someone with really quite humble roots. I grew up in London and am constantly paranoid about how I come across to my mainly middle class colleagues. The thing is, middle class and privileged people operate by a set of unwritten rules. It’s like a full time job in itself trying to emulate their way of interacting, lest you be called out for not being ‘nice’ enough or doing something odd to them, like forgetting to start an email with ‘Hope you are well?’. Only, they won’t let you know to your face that you’ve accidentally been too sharp or direct, or maybe that your joke wasn’t woke enough - no, that stuff just goes straight to HR.
2. The equality act 2010 makes it the employer’s responsibility to prevent sexual harassment in the workplace. Why wasn’t all this lewd stuff dealt with? GW said that no one had made a formal complaint. Again, it makes me wonder whether the middle class luvvies just didn’t want to call things out at the time because it’s ‘beneath’ them to even consider doing something about it.
3. Even though he’s apologised, the public doesn’t think that’s good enough. It’s like only perfect people get to keep their careers. Woe betide you if you said something crass on twitter 10 years ago, or got caught speeding or something.

Of course, lots of you would want to shout me down over this, but you know what? We’re all mums here and many of us have sons. Boys and young men do and say crass things. GW hasn’t raped or systematically abused anyone. It doesn’t make what’s happened right, but I also don’t think it’s right that swarms of pitch-fork waving strangers get to play judge, jury and executioner. I’m a big fan of forgiveness. Am I the only one?

There is definitely potential for this to become criminal

Perhaps try to use your saviour complex to help people who deserve it, not sexually aggressive, famous, middle aged, white predators.

Unless he is incredibly thick, he put his foot in it with his 'non apology' I don't get class. I grew up poor really from a rough town but I now have a degree and live in posh house so I'm a a chav still or a middle class woman? Same for GregG is he rich now therefore middle class or a barrow boy? And who is more unpopular than a white middle age, middle class man?

I have a very crass mate from my home town. She can make most men blush. But she is who she is, maybe GregG is too.

Big difference is, my mate owns that and has the grace of self awareness. Call her rude, she would apologise. She wouldn't gaslight you.

He needs to show some awareness and be more humble in his apology for that middle age women comment. Do middle class of certain age suddenly find bald middle age men so desirable they make crap like this up? It came across to me, that he thinks they do. Like a 26 year woman would giggle and be flatterd by it. Anyway you look at his response it makes zero sence to me.

He's only sorry now because lots of blokes didn't laugh at his put down. Dickish. Cancelled? Depends if he did those things. Can you make rape jokes and hold a high profile job? Let's hope not, for every girls sake.

Anyone who wonders why nobody came forward earlier. Sounds like they really did try but nothing was tied together so he got away with it. This is probably just the tip of the iceberg. BBC need to take a good hard look at themselves. And all the high paid men who worked alongside him and probably laughed at his “bants” shame on you too.

I was around on these here parts when the Saville stuff came out.

There's was initially a pile of people who defended him.

And there were links provided to earlier sources and threads on MN which made it clear how many people knew but did nothing.

As the accusations got worse those voices did start to go quiet. Now you won't get anyone who initially said stuff like that remotely admit that they did.

It's the same pattern over and over.

It didnt happen
And if it did, it wasn't that bad.
If it was that bad, why didn't they report it at the time?
And if so many people reported it at the time and it was so widely known, why didn't the head honchos at the BBC take action?

I think people are REALLY starting to tired over this.

Russell Brand is another example. He's been able to monetise it and create minions from it. But there's still an investigation pending and it will be interesting when that comes to its conclusion.

What's fascinating in a lot of these cases, the silence from the enablers only starts when it's gone to court.

It's depressing.

I think the response is proportionate to the crime, in that his career relies on fame and public 'adulation' for want of a better word. He obviously thought he'd got to a point where he thought he could do and say as he wanted without regard for public perception and approval. He got to a point where he couldn't. You live by the sword, you die by the sword.

Placemarking so I can read the next chapter of OPs fairy tale.

As a mother of daughters I really hope OP teaches her sons not to be sex pests but I doubt it if she truly believes Gregg has been treated badly over this.

If that’s what he did to the ‘middle class luvvies’ imagine what he has done to the ordinary people who aren’t privileged tv celebrities like he is?!

More than one ‘middle class luvvie’ has said they witnessed him groping junior staff, and made complaints about it.

I bet it'll come out that he has a ' sex addiction ' problem and his wife will make a statement saying his in rehab or wherever sex addicts go to get some help. He certainly needs it.
Then just disappear forever with any luck.
I feel sorry for his child and wife and family. It must be humiliating for them.

First of all, when someone says something sexually inappropriate when not expecting it, actually there isn't a prescribed way to react.
Sometimes you can be taken aback or too surprised to say anything.
Secondly as many have said , he was potentially in a position of power , so younger, runners, crew etc would not necessarily feel able to do that
Also if something was being filmed maybe they don't want that to be on camera
And most importantly lots of women did make complaints at the time and not much was done about it.
And if middle class middle age women in tv complain and nothing happens you can see why those in less influential positions might think there was no point!

The whole class thing is utter nonsense. Both my dad and my husband were working class, from the very poorest parts of Glasgow. Never, never would they have spoken to women the way Gregg has spoken to women in the workplace, - or anywhere else. And that’s because they were decent men. Gregg is not.

BUT THEY DID MAKE COMPLAINTS!

This is a huge part of the Gregg Wallace issue.

It's not just Gregg himself. It's those that didn't act further.

It's something almost like the bystander effect:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bystander_effect

Once a situation has been noticed, a bystander may be encouraged to intervene if they interpret the incident as an emergency. According to the principle of social influence, bystanders monitor the reactions of other people in an emergency situation to see if others think that it is necessary to intervene. If it is determined that others are not reacting to the situation, bystanders will interpret the situation as not an emergency and will not intervene. This is an example of pluralistic ignorance or social proof. Referring to the smoke experiment, even though students in the groups had clearly noticed the smoke which had become so thick that it was obscuring their vision, irritating their eyes or causing them to cough, they were still unlikely to report it. Only one participant in the group condition reported the smoke within the first four minutes, and by the end of the experiment, no-one from five of eight groups had reported the smoke at all. In the groups that did not report the smoke, the interpretations of its cause, and the likelihood that it was genuinely threatening was also less serious, with no-one suggesting fire as a possible cause, but some preferring less serious explanations, such as the air-conditioner was leaking. Similarly, interpretations of the context played an important role in people's reactions to a man and woman fighting in the street. When the woman yelled, "Get away from me; I don't know you," bystanders intervened 65 percent of the time, but only 19 percent of the time when the woman yelled, "Get away from me; I don't know why I ever married you."

You almost have a situation where sexual harassment is so normalised no one wants to break rank. They don't want to intervene and they don't see It as their responsibility - it's always someone else's.

I loved Gregg. My local pub had random pics of him surrounded by sprouts dotted around. I thought he was a decent guy. Loved him in eat well for less. There’s probably way more to it than what has been said

This OP is so insulting to the vast majority of working class men who behave decently to women. Working class people aren’t some kind of lesser moral beings who don’t know any better and have to be held to lower standards.

My DH comes from a humbler background than Greg Wallace. He is appalled by GW’s behaviour. He’d also be appalled to think that people would expect no better of him than to be a sex pest just because he grew up poor.

Are you on crack?! No, all boys don’t say crass things to the extent they make women fearful and uncomfortable. If you are the mother to a son who does this then you have severely fucked up and your son is a sex pest,

Are you rage baiting?

😳

Yep.

Just waiting for that plus the guaranteed mental health statement. He'll be playing the innocent victim for sure.

The script is so predictable.

It beggars belief too that the BBC have allowed this to happen YET AGAIN. I cannot believe heads haven't rolled at the BBC

while he's not assaulted anyone, he's been very inappropriate, and seems to be trying to pass it off as just banter. if he'd been more genuine in his apology and seemed like he intended to modify his behaviour, I might have more sympathy for him. but his attitude to this stinks.

He's cancelled himself really, hasn't he?

Way more to it than has been said? Like...what?

Not sure where he was born has anything to do with it. If my son turned out like him I would say I had failed as a parent.

You are premature. It appears that he has been accused of groping and rubbing his genitals on women at work. That is sexual assault and a crime.

More to come out, this is probably just the beginning