NO 2 during dinner

[Fannyanne88]

Me and DP are currently trying to encourage our DS (2 years) to use potty. It's hit and miss but we've had 5x number 2s on potty so far and everyone's thrilled. We set it up in kitchen/diner behind some chairs as barrier (he likes privacy) so we can keep an eye and he feels comfortable.
So tonight during dinner DS tells me he needs to go so I get potty as per usual. DP who's above average squeamish says no, take him to bathroom as he can't handle eating while DS goes for no 2. I go against his wishes and set up as per usual. Rationale being I don't want to change routine in fear of discouraging Potty use. Also, downstairs bathroom is freezing and time was of the essence.
So am I being unreasonable for "crossing DPs line" or am I gross and DS should not use Potty during mealtimes in kitchen/diner.

While eating? No that's gross yabu

Team DH

I think it is a bit gross, sorry OP! I think you can get a bit tunnel vision about potty training sometimes and divorced from reality a bit, and the reality is that someone doing a poo right beside where you are eating is not nice. You wouldn't change a nappy right there, so I wouldn't have DC use a potty there either. I'm not that squeamish but it would put my husband off his dinner (he is funny about poo but not sick, whereas it's the other way round with me, so it works out pretty well most of the time!)

I'm currently toilet training DD2 but we have a few potties that move around depending on where we are, mostly they are in bathroom but sometimes in the living room etc. I wouldn't have one in the kitchen while food was being prepared or eaten. I'm hoping she'll prefer the toilet for number 2s as poo in the potty is gross in the first place. DD1 preferred potty for poos and I was pregnant with DD2 and was heaving and retching every time I had to empty and clean it out if DH was at work

If we’re looking for consistency I’d say definitely set it up in the bathroom as that is where they will graduate to from the potty! 😉

Your DP is not “above average squeamish”. He is normal and you are disgusting.

But surely you know when he is "due" to go. It is about 24 hours after a heavy meal, could be sooner, but all depends on what is being eaten.
Also a warm drink can "encourage" movement.
Potty in the room you are eating in, absolutely no. I mean do you and your other half go in the dining-room?

Why do you want him to shit in the kitchen?! Disgusting

What on earth? Are you meant to track their poo?

This sounds grim tbh. Put it in the downstairs loo end of.

One of the most revolting things I have read on MN I think. I can't see any benefit in teaching a child that it's OK to shit anywhere but the bathroom, especially not around where people are eating. It's extremely disrespectful and downright nasty.

My first thought on starting to read this after seeing the title was 'thank God this does not refer to an adult.'

You're being gross.

That’s disgusting, how would you feel eating your tea and then your DH starts taking a shit next to you…. Is it ok because he builds a barrier for privacy?
Your child also needs to learn you go to a bathroom and don’t just drop it wherever you are

I think you're both being unreasonable tbh! DH is being completely wet about normal bodily functions and was stupid to suggest putting the potty in the dining room in the first place, especially if DS needs privacy. YANBU to want to be consistent, but if you know DH is squeamish about the potty and DS wants privacy, why go along with some silly set up having the potty in the dining room hidden behind a barrier of chairs? Doesn't meet anyone's needs, as you are now finding. Toilet training is about teaching children to respond appropriately to bodily cues but is also about teaching socially acceptable norms. If you don't want to take a shit behind the sofa, probably best not to teach your child to either.

We avoided potty’s entirely with the last 2 kids. Straight onto child’s seat on the toilet because it’s gross and the potty should be in the bathroom anyway.Never had an issue and there’s absolutely no need for a potty to be anywhere other than the toilet.

Why wouldn’t he potty be in the bathroom? Eew

At the beginning of potty training, for the first few weeks, we and all of our (non disgusting) friends all did this. Totally normal.
don’t worry, OP.

YANBU imo. I think it's more important to avoid giving children 'issues' around normal bodily functions. Obviously that's a fine line with also teaching that you can't just crap on the floor wherever you want - but you're not doing that, you're using a potty with him.

If ppl start skwarking around little ppl learning to do ordinary things those little ppl end up with issues & shame.

And no, OP isn't going to end up with her child shitting on the floor of tescos cos he used a potty somewhere other than the toilet.

I am in agreement with your DH tbh.
Also I have never seen or had potties dotted around the house.

I was a nurse and think you are dirty,that is disgusting,teach your child to use the toilet in a room with a toilet in it!

Potty in the kitchen is gross.

Meh, I don’t think it’s the worst crime but can understand why your husband might’ve felt a bit squeamish over it

Utterly gross 🤮 IMO

I can understand not wanting to confuse your child or give them hang us about using the potty, and I don't think them going in the kitchen is a huge deal but it is a bit gross.
Its also not the same as a nappy because a nappy contains it more so the smell is less intense.

What does being a nurse have to do with it?