If men were left to organise Christmas themselves

[Fiddlesticks32]

AIBU to think it would be an absolute disaster?

And what would it look like?

In my house, there would be a huge roast dinner - beef and turkey - DH always does the cooking. A few presents, mainly for the children, but he’s quite good at buying for me. Films, alcohol and chocolate. So pretty good really. But nothing would be wrapped, I’ve no idea what time it would happen and on Christmas Eve he’d fall asleep before Father Christmas had been.

It wouldn't be a disaster if DH were in charge, by any means. It'd be simpler, and he wouldn't bother with some of the things I would bother with, but the tree and outdoor lights would be sorted, the presents would be done, and he'd make a very good Christmas dinner.

We share the load in our household, and he looked after himself and his home very well before we met so has never been a useless man in that respect.

Edited to add:

There would also be lots to drink, lots of treats and most importantly allll the cheeses. 😋

my mother, tree up (that my dad actually assembled but she decorated) very very boring roast dinner served in the evening, turkey, mash OR roasties, peas OR sprouts, gravy, usually very lumpy or greasy. Over the top in gifts for my sister and I because her friends dropped by mid day when we were allowed to open the "haul" in front of them. For said friends, out came the sausage rolls and some other things, and a big tin of quality street, that we could not touch as it was for the "grownups" We got some little sandwiches and if there were any sausage rolls or any other things left from the "adult buffet" we could have them. My Dad was so very bossed around by her, but he found his balls in later years!! Too late for my childhood, but really came round with the grandkids, would pop over with treats, or fancy cafe hot choc for them through the whole month of December! He used to hand me an envelope and say, get her something she would like and a decent card. I would ask him if he had any idea for me, and he just said, anything. "I don't care" which is what my mother reduced him to. He was loyal to her to the end so she was lucky.

My husband, horrible cook but will do it all if needed, but does all the present shopping and I send him with a food list.. he also puts up all the lights and decor for me.

It would just be different priorities.

Presents would be gift cards, technology and alcohol. We would go out for Christmas lunch and at home there would be lots of booze, cheese, crackers and pork pies. And shortbread biscuits, but probably no decorations.

I used to do it all years ago when DC was young and extended family were around and I aimed for the traditional Christmas as seen on TV. It was quite stressful, but equally I was probably a bit controlling in my approach.

Things are a lot quieter now and we pretty much do things equally, a combination of less to do and more time to do it.

It would be awesome! My brother cooks for our extended family and actually cooks things from scratch in a delicious way (rather than spend a fortune at M&S and shove it in like I do) and my DP is excellent at gifts and making cocktails/a party go with a swing. I tend to bring a bottle of gin and some fancy Christmas crackers but I’m fairly confident one of them or the other guys could step up and do that if I vanished!

But yes - probably fewer decorations and non recyclable waste 😳

My husband would put on a fabulous Christmas, he always orders a lovely cut of meat and cuts out recipes to try from his bbq magazines. He’s a bit of an over spender though - one year he did some shopping on Christmas Eve and came home with enough food to feed the street.

He’s also the one to do the bulk of the decorating and has successfully cooked Christmas dinner completely solo more than once.

Then it's going to be end of Christmas.

I think the OP was hoping for an ‘aren’t men useless?’ misandrist thread. Happy it hasn’t happened.

The kids wouldn’t get anything they actually wanted and all the nice food would be forgotten!

Well if it was my late DH the tree wouldn't have gone up til a week before Christmas and everyone would have received books as presents. But dinner would be the same as he cooked it (though the table may not look as festive). So not a disaster at all.
I'm trying to think about my friends' husbands. I think things would be last minute and definitely not as festive looking - they'd probably see wreaths and any decs other than the tree as superfluous. But I know a couple middle aged bachelors and they skip the tree but do throw a bit of tinsel around. But they all care about the food!

DS went for xmas at his father's after not seeing him for many years against my warnings.
His father served him spring rolls and salad for xmas dinner, there were no presents or decorations. The only gift he got was food poisoning. He never went there again.
His father isnt short of a few quid and you can basically buy everything ready made now so there is no excuse.

My husband organises the presents, the tree and cooks Christmas dinner, so he does more than I do, really.

DH would likely get all pre-prepared shove in the oven food for Christmas dinner if left to organise that - he’s not a good cook and is terrified of giving people food poisoning so I’d be asked a lot of questions as to how cooked things look (a legacy of growing up on his DMs cooking which is pretty awful). He does get in plenty of alcohol and treat foods though.

Presents would all be bought and what everyone wanted as long as he can get it from Amazon. Weirdly he wraps all Christmas presents but not for birthdays. He always makes sure the cat has a present, and does do some of the shopping for the DC, as well as sorting cash/vouchers for family.

The tree and outside lights would be done but no other decorations, and the tree would look pretty haphazard, with all of the decorations at the front (so you can see them😂). His involvement with it is usually to get all the decorations out and put outside lights up, so he does pull his weight there.

in short, Christmas would absolutely happen, just slightly different to how I do things which is fine tbh.

Him indoors before we were together. With his mate, mate's brother, and mate's brother's mate.

A polypin of real ale on the side, purchased 4 days prior to allow to settle. Tons of cheese, biscuits, sausages and ice cream. Pub Xmas Eve and Boxing Day. Popping to sister's / Mum's to give cash for presents they bought their children on their behalf, and staying for the lunch. Back to flat for Dr Who, films, and beer.

They did that for bloody years.

My husband loved Christmas, and was a good cook - was far better at all of it than me!

In our house DH

Helps buy and put up the Christmas Tree (helps not by himself)
Buys me presents (I often end up wrapping them!)
Cooks Christmas dinner. (Which I've bought).
Organises meeting up with his family (but only after I put my foot down and told him it was up to him to organise this).

Beyond that...

Most men have zero organisation skills. Working at a supermarket, I seen it. 3:55pm Mother’s Day, 8pm Valentine’s Day

Men are the only gender I have seen going into the store 30 mins before it closes on Xmas Eve asking if we have any turkeys left!

My DF is organised. Ordered the turkey crown from butchers beginning of this month, making sure we have enough booze in etc.

Everything would be a bit last minute (as he works until Christmas morning, so wouldn't have as much time as I do!)

The food would be excellent, though very pastry heavy and he would probably be too late to buy the Gluten free treats I get for my son.

Presents will be OK for extended family and kids. But probably generic for the grown ups.
The niece and nephews will probably have the best present they have had from us in years. Though it will probably be an outing that doesn't happen till the summer!

Decorations will be OTT, and my favourite decs might not make the cut!

But then my husband is not useless!

My ex’s step father only did two nights a week in a warehouse, had all the time in the world, walked past shops which were open on his way to/from work. Yet still bought Xmas presents on XE.

In our house we divide and conquer Christmas as a team. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s a shame this ‘useless men’ stereotype persists because dumb women believe it and accept it, and dumb useless men relax behind it.

My husband does one thing for Xmas, buys me a gift. And it’s always on Xmas eve and I get annoyed stressed phone calls demanding to know what to get me.

the kids would have nothing.

I don’t really care though, my boys aren’t useless like him. I could leave Xmas to my 13 year old boy and he’d have a crack at cooking dinner. He loves cooking and is already helping with that. My 15 year old is great at buying and wrapping gifts. If they could get along (they don’t) they would be able to put on a decent Xmas.

DF and I are only allowed in the kitchen (a max of one of us) on XD. For these reasons:
. Carving turkey
. Taking things to/from garage as have freezers, fridge and it’s cold in there
. Making drinks

Otherwise DM gets very annoyed

Quieter, less stressful and a huge amount of pointless shit wouldn't get done.

There would be zero decorations, there would be genuine shock as to why everything is closed on Christmas Day when he pops out to grab a turkey and everyone has a promise of a gift because Christmas crept up on him as a complete surprise…again.