If men were left to organise Christmas themselves

[Fiddlesticks32]

AIBU to think it would be an absolute disaster?

And what would it look like?

TBH when I read a lot of the Christmas threads on here I wonder why so many posters seem to make so much work for themselves for a single day.

I grew up in a household where Christmas was celebrated but in a very low-key way. We did stockings, breakfast, a family walk and then spent the day at home playing board games and watching Christmas TV before dinner at about 7pm.

I genuinely don't recognise even half the stuff people talk about as though it's essential - buffets, cheese boards, inviting 20 relatives or driving to ten different houses to see as many people as possible - sounds awful to me 😂

We’d have an amazing Christmas meal, amongst shoddy decor and only my son would get a gift. His entire family would be there.

However if reversed we’d have substandard food in a beautiful, gift filled home, with only us in it! Definitely needs both of us!

Ad there are all these new things people do - polar breakfasts, elf on the shelf, Christmas eve box etc. I can't keep up with it all. We keep it simple bit it's perfectly lovely.

Exactly - men are as capable as women. From reading this thread, some women are control freaks and others should have made better choices as they are married to useless men.

Imagine if women could drive? What a wonderful thing that would be

We would still have a usual Christmas but with a lot of broken kitchen ware and a few more swear words …

It’s performative stress and chosen martyrdom, largely. I literally don’t give any thought to Christmas, apart from if DS wants something abstruse as a present that needs to be ordered and sending some cards, till the week before, and I thoroughly enjoy what little preparation is necessary. Christmas is fun.

I think the giant kerfuffle from some posters on here, who are stressing in late August, is from very low-energy people who struggle with day to day life, and find minor ‘extras’ unbearable.

If left to dh, we'd have amazing roasts or bbq, cheese and snacks. Maybe potatoes and some fruit for later.
Both mine and his family would be invited and when people ask if they can bring anything he'd probably ask them to bring some veg dishes.

@SallyWD I can only imagine my parents' reaction if I'd wanted a Polar Breakfast or for them to arrange Elf on the Shelf - they would have politely told me "fat bloody chance"

Or, my dad's favourite line of "when you're paying and organising it, you're free to do whatever you like!"

@Silenus I definitely agree with the martyrdom bit - it's crazy to me! I'm very grateful I married a man who is like me in that respect...

Everyone would get amazing fantastic high tech presents but he would forget half the people we buy for...

Decorations would go up in November and he would be sick of them by first week of December....

He would start planning food and drink on the 23rd December and then have to do some mental reshuffling in tescos on the 24th when he can't get what he wanted. He would also forget stuffing, sauces, Maybe gravy and definitely turkey. He would also forget to start cooking because playing with new stuff is more fun, dinner would end up being around 10pm and everything ready to eat at wildly different times.....

Would completely forget and abandon things like Christmas cards, advent calendars and school nativity costumes but he would absolutely book every single festive grotto, light trail and event going....

Basically him and the kids would have a great time, he wouldn't stress about anything at all and I could probably learn a thing or two from him! And although the first year would be a disaster, if he did it every year by about the 5th one he'd be a dab hand.

Amazing, as it always is. My DH is a wonderful cook, so the meal is always perfect. He's up early cooking and gets the table ready.
He chooses great gifts, lovely decorations - and he's great at clearing up!
That's been 40 years, now 😊
There are some capable, decent men who always make an effort. Our adult DS is also good at cooking and buying gifts!

It would be about the same here.

The Christmas tree would go up in November (had to insist we did it next weekend not this weekend) and carols would be playing everyday. Food would be simpler but fine with more short cuts and bought desserts (I do all the cooking by choice most of the time and he is out of practice). Kids gifts would be exactly the awful plastic tat they wanted rather then the nice mix of stuff I get them. I'm not sure if he would bother with stockings, would just give them a present to open early instead. There would be zero homemade gifts for any family. Gifts would be perfectly wrapped but no frills.

Or he would insist we go abroad to an all inclusive resort which we might do next year..

Not sure what is worse the 'useless' men or the women who fall for it then do nothing but accept it but complain constantly about it

It would continue to pass us by, since neither of us celebrates it.

Ours would be normal, 50/50 split of all duties as always.

The 1950s called OP, they'd like you back with them.

I remember one year I got all the Christmas dinner ready....put it all in the oven, got all the veg ready, etc. Settled down with a nice glass of port. After about an hour I thought I'll go and check on the food. My dearly departed husband had turned the oven off. 😭 We were all so hungry by that stage. He had just done it out of habit, you know that thing you do last thing at night, when you go round checking all the appliances are off. 😂 If he were here and was in charge of Christmas, we'd no doubt have a cold dinner, but I'd give anything to have him back.

We do a very low key Christmas compared to some, and did even when my children were small. I'm Danish and I celebrate similarly to how my grandparents did, which IMO is just right - not too much, not too little. Very little stress, very little hassle - I can't abide an overwrought Christmas.

And I don't believe in martyrdom, that scourge of womanhood passed down from generation to generation in many households, affecting daughters and sons negatively. I absolutely will not play that game.

One year we went out very late on the 23rd to buy everything for Christmas dinner/feasting. It was great! It helps that we're both good cooks, of course, so we could have made something lovely out of whatever we might've found.

It's almost the Christmas Month! Wishing you all a peaceful and relaxing festive season. 🎄🎄🎄

Same in our household. I'm the one responsible for presents and making the house feel festive and he's the one responsible for good food and drink!

My husband does main Santa gifts and the food. I do stockings. We all decorate together - he organises that tidy up each year. He did suggest getting catered dinner this year so I said I'd do it rather than that. I'd say he'll still do it tho!

I don’t know, think of something equally sexist about women and see if that helps.
If it helps, in my house DH wraps all the presents except his own (also involved in the buying), does the dinner, sorts the food shop (because he knows what he wants and he does it anyway), puts the decorations up and down, bakes cookies and cupcakes and various other bits.

DH is much more “on it” when it comes to present buying than I am - I am only now starting to think “must do some Christmas shopping”, whereas he’s been squirrelling gifts away for weeks already.

He’d happily decorate with the kids, and would probably follow along with my “tradition” of watching Muppet’s Christmas Carol and eating Christmas treats whilst doing so. He’d probably remember to book the panto and at least one festive cinema visit. He’d (albeit reluctantly) make sure we visited all the relatives at some point.

Foid though - he’d buy plenty of booze and treats, but there might not be an actual Christmas dinner. He’d be more likely to buy lots of M&S “party food” and do a sort of rolling buffet. He doesn’t really cook, but he can heat up a beautiful samosa. 😁

It sounds quite nice actually!! Maybe we’ll try it next year.

A couple of my relatives decided they actually prefer all the Christmas party food to a big Christmas dinner so just have a Christmas day of preprepared party food throughout the day, drinking, watching TV, having friends pop in, popping round to see friends in walkind distance as no-one wants to drive on Christmas day itself. I think if no children/ elderly relatives to cater for this is a low stress pleasant way to spend Christmas day.

We have 17 for Christmas Day - three generations. We always have a huge cold buffet. No one particularly likes the traditional Christmas meal or for anyone to be stuck in the kitchen preparing it.