If men were left to organise Christmas themselves

[Fiddlesticks32]

AIBU to think it would be an absolute disaster?

And what would it look like?

It would be exclusively about eating food and Christmas movies. Loads of relatives would not receive anything. The kids would get everything they asked for however OTT. It would be a lot less work for me. In some ways I am tempted to try it, but I think I would miss my more planned version of Christmas.

Because more often than not women are the ones who organise Christmas celebrations...

Yes I've noticed this trend on here, and in general on MN. Many posters are saying my DH would do a fine job, and then some are saying aw all the poor men can't organise anything.
Of course the majority of men are perfectly capable of being competent around the house, just like they are at work. Some choose not to be.

Out of interest what was wrong with your ex? 😂

I'd actually really like to try this as an experiment, just to see if you could actually pull off Christmas by starting everything on Xmas eve

Of course you could. Sitcom families do it all the time.

”You know what? We don’t need any trip to Colorado. We can have Christmas right here! Grandpa - go chop down a tree. Benny and Bobby - lights and decorations. Buffoon husband - break out your amusingly awful boysenberry wine. Clara, Sara, Kara - to the kitchen. We have work to do!”

”Gee, Mom - this is gonna be the best Christmas ever!”

”Woof woof!”

”….and Muffle thinks so too!”

<General laughter>

Sometimes people can surprise you. I always thought my FIL would be useless at Christmas, but since my MIL has been ill, he's pretty much done it all himself. And while he isn't the greatest cook, the truth is he is no worse than she was!

Poster after poster after poster has told you it wouldn't look like that. Why don't you believe women?

What's made you so bitter?

I came on to say exactly this. My husband goes all out at Christmas and I love it!

This thread is just more misandrist shite, seen often on MN.

He would do a great job -it would all just be last minute on Christmas Eve (which would freak me out) and I like Christmas to start evening 23th as I love Christmas Eve. Not fighting crowds out and about.

But my DH is a competent human who would ensure our DD still had a wonderful Christmas, if I couldn’t.

My exDH did organise Christmas, and it was far better than if it had been left to me. Not all men are hopeless you know.

Since when?

If DS was in charge -
Excellent, very practical gifts all round.
Terrific turkey and all the trimmings. Huge brunch earlier.
Christmas tree very well attached to the stand and at a 45 degree angle to the floor but ornaments few and far between.
Table setting - haphazard; many items forgotten.
Case of cold beer instead of wine.
He would pay me anything I asked to make the desserts.

A 90 degree angle!!!

ExH would have left it at 45 degrees.
If he did Christmas, there would be a lot of shouting all day, starting with loud complaints about the statenofnthebhouse and the necessity of cleaning it from top to bottom before anything else could be done. As dinner was prepared, there would be lots of plates or glasses broken through sheer carelessness, accompanied by lots of cursing and blaming whoever was standing within ten feet of him, food either overcooked or undercooked, and some vital ingredient left out of dessert (sugar, for instance). Presents would be the first thing he saw in whatever shops he went into on Christmas Eve. They would be very random and very cheap.

We would have wine, food, a great Xmas dinner that he would clear up perfectly. I do presents, crackers, ensure Xmas delivery slot is booked, decorations, school stuff, plan annual leave, xmas jumpers, advent calendars, wrapping, coordinating relatives.

He would do any of the above if prompted by me; but he would happily live without it. He thinks the kids are spoilt so would only get them a couple of things rather than a pile.

Some things I’ve stopped doing: cards, loads of decorations, doing family Christmas trips out.

If men were in charge of xmas in general there would be a lot less tat bought and things would get organised in the last two weeks before Christmas. Companies would have to change their adverts. This would please the people who complain that Christmas gets earlier and earlier each year.

We have a super low-key Christmas anyway so I doubt anything would be any different.

In our house it would be fine. Christmas wouldn’t start until about a week before the 25th but there would be decorations, food and presents. It may not be as fancy with the extra little presents and decorations but the food would be fine - albeit with a surfeit of dried fruit!

I though you said it wasn't a men-bashing thread....
Plenty of men can organise Christmas celebrations. They just don't do it in the same way women want them to. So women then complain, decide they are better off doing it themselves or nag the men to do in a specific way.
That article you posted above about 23 tasks on a Christmas list... well, I don't know what they are. These are the tasks in my house: buy a tree (partner does unprompted), decorate (doing it together as a family), plan and shop for a meal Christmas meal (everyone suggest what they fancy and partner then drives us to Costco for a big shop which he, generally, pays for), cook the meal (whoever is at home the day before does all the prep and we then share out the dishes to prepare), buy and wrap gifts (we each do it for each other, kiddo and our respective families). That is it. I may or may not send some cards to people I know. Oh yes, my partner also takes us out to a Christmas market every year.
Now, I am sure plenty of women have lists as long as their arms and get stressed. I don't really see why this is men's fault. If my partner wanted some Christmas extravaganza with activities booked for every day of December, I wouldn't expect him to say how useless I am for not organising it and sticking to a simple family meal and a few fairy lights.
Oh yes, out tree also doesn't have a "theme". Shocker, I know...

What are the 23 Christmas tasks? Because, I don't think we do anywhere close to that?
The article didn't seem to list all 23?

I totally agree. I'm a complete Christmas fan and I don't think I do anywhere close to 23?

1. Send Christmas cards
2. Get advent calendars
3. Decorate the house
4. Buy presents
5. Organise panto tickets
6. Wrap presents
7. Buy food and drink
8. Cook Christmas Dinner

Maybe arrange to see family and friends as another one? If someone has a 23 item long list no wonder they're stressed about it!

I think some men would organise a lovely Christmas. My brother organised it last year and it was fantastic. However, if my DH organised it, it would be very lacklustre. No decorations, probably beams on toast and some last minute presents. He has absolutely no interest in Christmas.

lol at the accusations of anti-men feeling when in fact women are speaking from their own experiences. Like in a Christmas Carol, the Ghosts of NAMALT

I disagree. Men just tend not to sweat the little detail. It's just a roast dinner with crackers

Women Tend to put way too much pressure on themselves

Our house would be decked in the trashiest christmas Dec's and lights, no cards would have been done and food would be from Iceland and deep fried and saturated in chilli.

As for presents, they'd be bought on 23rd and hastily wrapped.

Maybe he'll improve, we are only in year 3 and DD is 2!

My husband and Dad would both make a decent job of it. They’re good cooks and gift buyers, and they like the process of decorating for Christmas so it would get done. My husband is good at booking things and thinking of activities for our child.

Neither would go to the full extent my mum and I do, but it certainly wouldn’t be a disaster, both would absolutely manage a very pleasant Christmas with all the main constituents!

I suspect a lot of men wouldn’t be as good as they are though. You see a lot of women posting on mumsnet about how useless and selfish their husbands are. If a man has spent forever being handed Christmas on a plate with no effort required from themselves, they would be hopeless at making it happen themselves.

I think my list is probably longer than 23 😂 (though I would break things down more than your lists do, into individual tasks). My task list is more like:

1. make list of everyone to send Christmas cards to
2. sort and donate toys no longer played with to make room for inevitable influx of new stuff
3. send Christmas list for child to family (if requested by them)
4. write and post Christmas cards
5. book activities for child - Santa visit, woodland lights walk, etc
6. make list of gifts to buy
7. buy wrapping paper
8. buy gifts
9. buy advent calendars
10. wrap gifts
11. plan Christmas menu (we don’t eat the same thing every year so have to decide what to make)
12. make Christmas cake
13. make Christmas pudding
14. decorate Christmas cake
15. buy food shop
16. buy Christmas tree
17. collect winter foliage for decoration
18. visit Christmas market
19. make mince pies to keep in freezer
20. attend Carol service
21. check Christmas lights work ahead of decorating
22. make small homemade gifts (mulled wine syrup / jars of shortbread etc for unexpected guests
23. make child’s nativity / show costume
24. big pre-Christmas tidy
25. buy crackers
26. Decorate
27. Make Christmas dinner
28. take down decorations
29. clean up

There are probably a lot of other things I do each year which I’m forgetting! However, I am aware that a lot of it is not required and I do it because I love it and it makes me happy. I don’t find it stressful, it’s joyful.

My husband wouldn’t do everything on that list, though he shares the work equally with me at present. He would certainly do a very nice Christmas with all the important bits himself.