to think it isn't 'attention-seeking' not to drink tea or coffee?

[ruethewhirl]

I've just had this ridiculous accusation levelled at me by an acquaintance (note I didn't say friend). 'But isn't it all just a bit attention-seeking really?' 😬

No. I just don't drink them because I don't like them. Never have. Where's the attention-seeking in that?! I don't even mention it unless it becomes directly relevant i.e. someone offers me a tea or coffee. OK, if I went on about it, or suggested others should follow suit, or got funny when people can't offer me anything to drink/expected hosts to get alternative drinks in for me (not that I've ever been to hers, so maybe she's making assumptions based on other people she's known)... but I don't. I have noticed people sometimes get a bit stressed about this if I'm at their house and they haven't anything else to offer me, but I'm genuinely fine with a glass of water, or a hot chocolate if they have it in, but I'd never expect them to get it specially.

She followed it up with 'Yes, but it's nice to be able to offer your guests a hot drink, isn't it' so maybe she's assuming I don't do that myself when hosting - she's never been to my place - but of course I do! Just because I don't drink something myself doesn't mean I'm not going to make it for other people.

I dunno, I'm not super worked up about it, more curious and mildly irked. It's not the first time people have criticised me for not drinking tea or coffee (I was once called 'childish' over it), and it really baffles me why they would even care. AIBU to think this is just odd and narrow-minded?? 🤔

Is 'wet wipes' slang for 'well hydrated'?

Caffeine is a stimulant. It can be addictive and people can suffer withdrawal symptoms. So yes, it is an 'upper'.

"Not a people pleaser" but force yourself to drink something you don't like just because you don't want to pipe up "sorry, can I just have a glass of water instead?"
Ok...... 😁
you are

One of my brothers doesn't drink ANY hot drinks, never has and has no kettle so we don't expect at his, and another's wife ONLY drinks hot chocolate as a hot drink - to be fair she does tend to carry a few sachets in her handbag so never an issue.
It's quite common in this day and age - I'm not averse to just a glass of hot water myself (lemon slice optional, ginger slice a bonus)

You are definitely a people pleaser!! Only a people pleaser would ever do this. 🤣

Drinking water isn't weird, and everyone in the UK has water quite literally on tap, so it's no hassle to pour a glass.

I like tea, but not coffee. Would never expect anyone to drink either drink if they didn't enjoy it.

How weird to think it's attention seeking! I don't drink hot drinks and it's never been an issue. Sometimes people comment on it as mundane small talk, but I can't imagine thinking it was an attention thing.

I do keep tea and coffee in the house for visitors. But for my close friends and relatives, I advise them to make it themselves as I don't know what a good cup is!

you don’t need to give a reason for what you choose to do, no one cares anyway.

Your the one that made it a drama with the truth comments. There is no need to extrapolate the circumstances of your life to a complete stranger. It’s boring.

Why would it matter if they asked again? It’s not shameful, they’re not offering something illegal, Just say no thanks again. Then say can I have a water or have you got any… fill in the blank, pop, soda, cocaine…. Why do people feel the need to draw attention to the fact they don’t like something. It’s boring.

A complete stranger?
Most people aren’t offered random cups of tea at someone’s house etc by a stranger 🤣
Usually it’s someone you know and are likely to see them again and therefore can save a lot of time by telling them.

Quite ironic that you used the word 'extrapolation' in your reply. cough

Fancy a game of scrabble?

Yep. I wonder when grown ups are allowed to make their own choices?

And you cannot have hot chocolate without squirty cream and marshmallows...that would be insane!

How on earth did I miss this yesterday? jaw drops

You're either being deliberately goady or inhabit a very narrow world. Hot chocolate isn't just for children ffs, and that's before I even get started on 'should like'... 🙄 If you genuinely mean what you are saying, then I think you need to get out in the world more.

I really can't understand where you're coming from here. How is it 'boring' to say you don't like something? It IS boring to be asked if you want something again and again, and saying you don't like something would stop that.

Are you in a wind-up or do you have shares in Tetley?

This thread has garnered some of the most ridiculous replies I've seen on here on a long time. All over a cup of blimmin' tea 😂

What a ridiculous thing to say.

I have a friend who for various reasons,gave up drinking coffee a couple of months ago. Now he never misses an opportunity to start getting on his high horse and start boasting about how 'great' he feels now, and lecturing me about my one a day latte habit. So tiresome.

I love a hot chocolate with squirty cream and marshmallows!

No one should have to like anything, grown up or not. I'm not making myself feel/be ill because someone thinks I should eat or drink something as I'm a 'grown up' 🙄

I’m not a massive tea or coffee drinker, I go through phases. I defo never order one when out at a cafe etc. my family and a few friends always keep either Vimto or ribena in as I LOVE either of them hot. In fact I think I asked for hot orange squash once… never got called attention seeking though lol!! Ignore your “acquaintance” and enjoy being different!!

I think that it is a bit anti social and it closes your self off socially. The whole ritual of making a hot drink while chatting is so deeply ingrained, I would find it off putting and strange if someone didn't drink either. I think your conversations would be limiting without that ritual and people would probably hold back on opening up to you because it is likely to create trust issues!

I don't drink tea or coffee, coffee makes me feel sick and I've never liked tea. I occasionally have hot chocolate but it has to be made with milk and not water (Starbucks is the only place I've found hot chocolate that I like) and I have a velevtiser at home.

I've friends who get squash or juice in for me. My boss offers me a can of coke instead of coffee if he's buying. I also always make sure that we have soft drinks in meetings and not just water.

I've never drunk it, never liked it.

WTAF?!? You think people have trust issues because they don't drink tea or coffee? If you can only have a conversation with someone while you are making a hot drink you are the one with the problem, not them!

This thread is truly batshit

What the actual... I have no words. How is not liking a drink anti social and creating trust issues. So odd.

Because talking about yourself pulls focus to you.