Dad going to Disneyland without his son

[Maria1979]

Just a rant really about how heartless some men people are. A couple (in their forties with an 8 year old son) I know broke up two years ago. Man had found a younger model (25, blonde, curvy bimbo). I am not close friends with woman but we meet regularly (friend's friend). I run into the man and his bimbo often (she does seem really sweet and kind but not alot brain activity going on). Man has his son 2 week-ends per month and he always complains about how his ex is ruining him financially (I see him often so I don't want a conflict I just say that children are expensive and leave it there). Well today he said he's going to Disneyland during the christmas holidays.I said that "Ben" must be thrilled. That's when he goes "Oh, no we're not taking him. I'm sick of just thinking about everryone else. I already took him with ex when he was younger. This time me and "Bimbo" are going to just have fun. But don't tell Ben or ex. Haha". Bimbo giggling beside him. I went numb. I couldn't find any words. How can you be so utterly selfish it's beyond me. And how a man in his forties can enjoy Disbeyland is beyond me but that's another issue.
I don't want to tell the woman because it's none of my business and also because it's just so bloody hurtful.
AIBU not telling her?

Adults go to Disneyland without children all the time - but there is a bit of an ick factor to a middle-aged man taking a much younger girlfriend there as a couples holiday, almost infantilising her/really leaning in to treating her as if she were even younger (not suggesting this wouldn't be entirely consensual, either!).

No,you MUST take them,or are you some sort of bimbo? 😂

I don't like your descriptions - especially "bimbo"

However - to answer - you seem irrationally crooks with said "bimbo" for being with a man who has a child.

It is not her responsibility to parent said child.

Or her responsibility to make said man(child) take his kid on holiday.

Parents can - and often do - holiday without their children. They do this as a married couple or second relationship etc.

You are far to emotionally invested to say you don't really know these people.

Also, mysoginistic (bimbo, really?)

Is he an arsehole? yes
If he was taking a holiday with his girlfriend anywhere else but Disneyland, would it be an issue? Probably not. It is a bit odd that they would pick a destination that kid centric as adults, but to each their own.
Also, for all you know, the new girlfriend is paying for this.
I don't understand why you are being so nasty about her, she hasn't done anything wrong as far as we know.

Also, we do not need to take our kids everywhere we go.

Keep in mind that the boys mother may not want her son holidaying abroad with his dad and girlfriend at 8yrs old. Have you thought about that?

I wouldn't be surprised if the OP does turn out to be the Ex. The language and judgement coming from her would be a lot more understandable. People do try change details on here, to avoid being too outing!

That's a very good point, Bunny.

This.

And yes, Disneyland & Disney World is great without children.

Also, ”went numb”? Get a life. Maybe go to Disneyland yourself.

Everything else aside, I don't think his attitude of "I'm sick of thinking about everyone else" is ever okay when the "everyone else" is your own son. That's what you signed up for.

My ex and his gf took our sons to DL but they were 12 and 14. No way would I let my lone 8 yr old go under the same circumstances.

Can't get passed you calling her Bimbo, sorry

Why is he an arsehole ? Affairs happen to both sexes. Men leave for their affair partners, so do women. The fact that they’re going to Disneyland without his kids really isn’t an issue - or at least shouldn’t be if he’s being fair to his kids in other respects. I think OP is far too invested in people she knows very little about.

What does a 'bimbo' look like??

I've seen this somewhere today ? Can think where ?
Social media or a newspaper.

What's her hair colour or figure or indeed age got to do with any of this.

"Bimbo" indeed🙄

Get over it

You have to drop the ‘bimbo’ nonsense. Nothing you have said in your post indicates there is anything wrong with the woman or she has had anything to do with the split or is unkind. It’s just bashing another woman for the sake of it.

Try re-writing this and take out any negative reference to the ‘girlfriend’. It’s about him, not her.

@Maria1979 I think you should blank him in future considering how much you dislike him.

I’ve generally been polite/friendly (if I happen to bump into them) and try to take a neutral stance to any ex-H’s of friends, adopting an attitude of “he has always been very nice to me” and “there are 2 sides to every story and I’ve only heard one”. That doesn’t mean I don’t sympathise and agree with my friends about awful behaviour.

If I felt as strongly as you do, I wouldn’t even speak to them…I would cross the road or just walk past. I think you should do this in future and then you wouldn’t find out these things to torment you. Sorry if that’s not helpful.

Anyway back to the holiday.. yabu. He's allowed to go on holiday with his new partner. They probably want to go and have a more adult holiday and spend time in their hotel shagging. If their son has already been to Disney land it's probably best he keeps his memories of going with his mum and dad not his mum and dad and now his dad and his dad's new partner. They might not have fully integrated the new partner into the stepmum role. Just think of it as a couples holiday and you'll be able to reframe it. He's said not to tell ex or his son because of reactions like yours really.

I’m a fair bit older than a lot of posters here I’d say, and I remember Bimbo being a pink teddy bear made by Chad Valley in the late 60’s and early 70’s. Quite how the word translated into representing the myth that OP is perpetuating here - a vacuous giggling but attractive, curvy blonde I have no idea. That a woman is perpetuating the idea that if you’re blonde and attractive you must be thick as two short planks, is concerning. Particularly when they admit they don’t actually know the person to any extent.

And for all you know she's paying for it

It is concerning and I hope they don't work in recruitment or healthcare

Now now, stick with the narrative !! Apparently she’s a Bimbo, and I think the job description involves relying on him as the Sugar Daddy to pay up and look happy !!

I would agree, she's the ex in the story and is jealous and bitter. She's also clearly transported from the 1970s.