Dad going to Disneyland without his son

[Maria1979]

Just a rant really about how heartless some men people are. A couple (in their forties with an 8 year old son) I know broke up two years ago. Man had found a younger model (25, blonde, curvy bimbo). I am not close friends with woman but we meet regularly (friend's friend). I run into the man and his bimbo often (she does seem really sweet and kind but not alot brain activity going on). Man has his son 2 week-ends per month and he always complains about how his ex is ruining him financially (I see him often so I don't want a conflict I just say that children are expensive and leave it there). Well today he said he's going to Disneyland during the christmas holidays.I said that "Ben" must be thrilled. That's when he goes "Oh, no we're not taking him. I'm sick of just thinking about everryone else. I already took him with ex when he was younger. This time me and "Bimbo" are going to just have fun. But don't tell Ben or ex. Haha". Bimbo giggling beside him. I went numb. I couldn't find any words. How can you be so utterly selfish it's beyond me. And how a man in his forties can enjoy Disbeyland is beyond me but that's another issue.
I don't want to tell the woman because it's none of my business and also because it's just so bloody hurtful.
AIBU not telling her?

he wasnt a married man when they got together.

Sorry but like other posters you lost me at ‘bimbo’. You’ve been so incredibly rude and condescending about a woman you don’t know that I really can’t take the rest of your concerns seriously. It’s none of your business. If you’re not particularly close to any of them take a step back - you’re way too invested in the drama.

I wouldn’t be too quick to condemn either of them based on the terminology OP uses in her posts. She hardly knows any of the participants in the drama she’s created and I’d bet the farm things are anything but how they seem.

YABU. We’ve been the DLP 4 times, twice with the kids, twice without. We’ve also been to WDW Florida and didn’t take any of the kids. We didn’t feel guilty any of the times we didn’t take the kids 🤷‍♀️ It’s important to prioritise your relationship.

I’m not sure how any of it is your business to be honest? Adults are allowed to enjoy Disneyland too. Yes it would be nice to take the child but as a parent, it’s also nice to enjoy things without a kid in tow. I’d mind your own business, you haven’t come across that nice to be honest.

I'm assuming Disney Paris? Can't think of anywhere more godawful to go - did it a couple of times with children, but it's utter hell on earth so why any adult would choose to go without children is way way beyond me!

Obviously I may well be in the minority.

OP he’s told you that his ex is ruining him financially - from that I deduce he must be paying as he should. He doesn’t have to like it as long as he does it, which, taken at face value seems to be the case. And yet you say in your post that he’s stingy with his ex. Both can’t be true. I think you’re making a lot of assumptions - you don’t know these people very well so you can’t know what’s actually going on in their private lives, and if he’s being fair to his kids, then where he and his girlfriend choose to go on holiday is really nobody’s business but theirs.

You deciding another woman is a bimbo is horrible. How would you like it if others were labelling you a bimbo behind your back.

You sound like a bully. I hope he and his girlfriend have a lovely time away.

I’ve been to Disneyland with my partner when I had a 3 y/o and didn’t take them. It was amazing, a really romantic and fun trip. I took DD when she was 7 instead and she could really appreciate it. So YABU in that a 40 something year old man can enjoy Disneyland, it’s a brilliant experience for adults and different when not looking after kids/limited by ride heights and nap times and tantrums.

However, if I were the ex-wife of the man I’d be expecting him to look after the son for long enough that I could date if I wished and go on holiday too, and for him to take his son on fun adventures as well as his new girlfriend!

What a selfish piece of shit.

You sound so so awful and also separated parents are allowed to go on holidays without their children when it’s not their contact time. It doesn’t sound like there was any cheating so the way you lay into the new girlfriend who has done nothing wrong and who you say is nice and sweet is just shocking.

Would it matter o much if he was going to Thailand/ Riviera/ Turkey/ anywhere else?
I can’t see the attraction of a 40something and partner going to Disney but each to their own. If it’s their idea of fun let them crack on.

If you had posted this without insulting the girlfriend, you would've had very different responses.

Because she's done nothing wrong. She wants to go to Disney? Who cares. Loads of Disney obsessed adults out there.
He has the child. He has responsibility to think about it.
Just because she's young and had a nice figure doesn't mean you should use derogatory terms

Sometimes I take the last chocolate bar or chocolate biscuit and lock myself in the bathroom to eat it because I don't want to share it with my kids.

I could t get past your misogyny not the term ‘bimbo’ your point has been completely lost.

I think this too. Just goes to show it achieves nothing when you start being bitter. OP, You’re just the friend who parrots the ex wife. Lucky you!

"My partner's ex has a really weird nosy friend who clearly thinks she's better than me because I'm... blonde and have curves? I dunno, it's weird", probably.

OP, you were correct that it's none of your business that a man is taking his 'sweet, kind' girlfriend on holiday. Perhaps get over it.

You do realise you are perpetuating the problem and are part of the reason men like this can go largely unchallenged? You’ve purposely made a point of shifting the main focus onto the woman with your misogyny so really although you want to appear outraged by this man you would prefer the main focus of hate is directed at the woman.

congratulations on your own goal there 🙄

He sounds awful and this is a horrible thing to do to his child.

Your wording is irrelevant here, unlike his behaviour. But people will do anything to avoid judging a shit dad.

I thought the same. The description of the Gf smacks of jealousy IMO.

Sorry forgot to quote the post I was commenting on.

So many women do this and I don’t get it. The man has caused the hurt but they direct their anger at his girlfriend!
Ex wife, her friends, her mum, etc.. they’re all full of hate towards ex husband’s girlfriend because it feels so much better and cathartic to have a pop at her instead. And it doesn’t stop when she becomes his long term partner or wife either. Pathetic.

I'd check your spelling and grammar, which in places is dismal, before you insult another woman's intelligence.