Adult Children who live at home the heating goes on when your parents say so.

[oktheber]

Just a bit of a rant really with some young colleagues I work with in their 20's who live with their parents. Yes I know it has been snowing, yes I know you're freezing cold but at the end of the day if you're parents will only have the heating on for a couple of hours in the evening then that's absolutely their right to choose to that. Just because you pay them rent, which is not at market value I should say, does not mean you can put the heating on the days you WFH and your parents are right to be furious for you do that.

AIBU?

I say UABU it's freezing 🥶 at the moment. There was that mum a few years ago only had the heating on when her children were at home. She sadly passed away. You can only wrap up to a certain extent. I assume you have the heating on before leaving the house. Just add the extra cost onto their rent.

Of course they can put the heating on if they are paying rent. FFS. If the rent needs to go up slightly as the heating is on more that’s something to discuss with the adults in the house.

If they’re adult and working I’d expect them to be contributing financially so the cost of putting the heating on is more doable.

My adult children pay rent and extra for electric. Nice to have a warm home for them

I do 🙋🏻‍♀️

If moneys is tight and they are working they need to contribute to bills.
If they are contributing a fair amount then yes I think they should have a say when heating goes on.
I WFH and have had heating on today. I can't concentrate if I'm cold.
My teen DC can put heating on when they are cold, although I do remind them to put a jumper on first!

sorry I posted on the wrong thread!

It must be pretty rubbish to be in your twenties, working full time, forced to live with parents and then have to freeze too!

I don't mind them being warm, so long as they don't think they can dictate what's on TV and if they want to watch on their devices use headphones.

And I don't care if there are more of them than us. Our home is not a democracy! 😆

In fairness my DCs are teens not adults, but I don't see my view changing as they get older. 😁

I think the clue is in the name @oktheber. "Adults" living together and behaving like, you know, adults? Sensible and reasonable discussion and action?

They lived for free even though they were working?

I always put the heating on at my parents' house when I'm cold (though in fairness that rarely ever happens as mum feels the cold and has every radiator on in August!)

If they had to pay the electricity and gas bill as part of their rent you can be sure they'd have it on less often than it's on now.

It teaches budgeting. It's real life. I always paid rent to my parents. Imagine the shock when they eventually move out and they don't get to keep all their wages!

Then they can move out. If they are working full time, they can get a room in a shared house.

I love my kids.. even though they have left home now.. but they could have heating on anytime they needed.. it's their home too.
Just pay extra in summer to cover your winter bill.
Spread the cost.

My mum lives with me and pays nothing. I put the heating on much more than I would if I lived alone because I love her and want her to be comfortable in her home.

I think most functioning adults can work that out. I never charged my adult DC rent, but they understood they had to pay it when living elsewhere.
They never had any problems budgeting.

If you are that poor it's an issue, charge them more rent....

I wouldn't let my kids go cold.

This seems like a very British problem that has existed before central heating:

“Scrooge had a very small fire, but his clerk’s fire was so very much smaller, that it looked like one coal. But he couldn’t replenish it, for Scrooge kept the coal-box in his own room; and so surely as the clerk came in with the shovel, the master predicted that it would be necessary for them to part. Wherefore the clerk put on his white comforter, and tried to warm himself at the candle”

Gosh I wonder how I manage to stay on top of my mortgage and bills! My parents never ripped me off but somehow I can still do it, what a miracle!

That's lovely 😊

The AC if they are working from home should pay for the extra daily units they use.
I expect they are not paying market rent value for the space they use nor the food they eat.

Yabu. It’s bloody freezing right now.

I remember my stepdad going absolutely barmy with me because I dared put the fire on! Shouted in my face and everything. I understand why now though and my own dc have to be properly dressed and had something warm to eat and/or drink before putting the heating on.