Honest opinions ... is a UK 14/16 seen as unattractive for dating as a 50 year old?

[lemonepisode1]

I'm online dating for a while. My face is decent and I'd consider myself relatively attractive in the looks stakes but it is my body that men seem to dislike.
As above , I'm that size, 5'7', proportioned except for a wide , flabby meno belly.Im 2.5stone overweight on the scales.
I weight train and walk and run over the week.. so I exercise every day. Look after my appearance/ clothes/ grooming etc but I really believe it's my body that turns them off .
Honestly, especially to men on here, is that size and body type unattractive to you on a woman who is 50?
What are your experiences and more so, what do you find attractive out of interest ?
Thanks.
Lemon

I could be wrong, but I get the impression the OP is looking for a partner to have a relationship with? If all she wanted was to make randoms want sex with her, all she needs to do is...well...exist.

Once you have them that is another game but to start and get one that is not 20 years older (as many have stated men go for younger women because....well why not, they can)

Sure, they can 'go for' younger women.

But the reality is that unless they have something very special to offer, these younger women will not be going for them.

What’s with all the dress sexy look feminine sexist shit?

Seriously by age 50 us women know our personal style and what works for us so turning up for an afternoon coffee date in ‘something sexy’ is really not good advice.

Be you. Dress in your personal style. If they don’t like the way you present them they’re not the right one.

I had a date with a man who told me my dress was ‘a bit too bright for a date’ meanwhile he looked like he’d slept in a skip.

Do you and be comfortable with yourself is the best advice

Its bloody frustrating that men in their 50's think they can catch a women in their late 30's. I wish it wasnt true. Yes, I think weight sadly could be a factor. I met DH online dating a number of years ago now and on talking to potential dates I would say 50% plus wanted to know my size.

The fact is that I am petite and a size 10 however most of the men I did eventually meet were hardly god's gift and I was early 30's. As the OP states - they fib about their age, height etc ever hopeful that once I met them I would be persuaded that there was a George Clooney in there somewhere.

I do also think as another PP says - make them work for it. If someone doesnt like you - then just like the move on and dont take it personally. Some men are truly deluded as to what they can offer and YOU also can afford to be choosy!

They don't have a chance with the vast vast majority of women in their 20s ...unless it is a sugar baby "relationship" (or very occasionally a vulnerable young woman).

So they can look all they want.

Wanting doesn't equal getting.

I've been forced to say nothing to numerous men since my teens who assumed I was a romantic prospect for them in spite of them bring significantly older and often not even attractive.... In order not to be verbally abused.

A significant portion of the male population is "aspirational", shall we say, about their dating prospects. Delusional, un self aware, shameless and serious chancers.

I have only seen the equivalent maybe once or twice in years and years, in females so far.

Why anyone thinks it matters that they want significantly younger women,; when younger women have opportunities with younger men - who make up 50-50 of the population, is WTF.

Unless there's financial incentive, mamy 20 something women would not touch over 35, 40 at a pinch. Even then, they are far more likely to encounter and get involved with men their own age through school/college/uni/part-time jobs/sports/youth groups/friendship groups/clubs etc. etc. They have far more in common with their peers and their peers will be on average significantly more sexually attractive. They'll also have less baggage (or none).

So they can want all they like. What they get is something else entirely.

I had a date with a man who told me my dress was ‘a bit too bright for a date’ meanwhile he looked like he’d slept in a skip.

It's like there's something in the effect of testosterone on the brain that makes men feel entitled to judge women's looks, presentation, age etc etc - while being completely oblivious to their own looks, presentation and age.

I actually think it's their baseline of objectifying women ....that makes them think the way they do.

They don't see the "context", of her life, her prospects, her peer group, her wants ... Because she's an object to them.

This. 😅

I don't think it's unusual for some professional women to have had kids around 40, like you did.

I honestly think you could find someone around your age with a child/ten around the same age.

It's probably going to be a pretty educated/professional woman or a woman who had a failed relationship/s in her 20s and most of her 30s without having kids and then had one or two quickly around 40.

Absolutely. I’ve gone on dates and not liked what he’s wearing or thought his appearance isn’t what I’m attracted to however I’ve not been rude enough to comment.

I can’t imagine many women go on a first date and say ‘I really don’t like your shirt’ or ‘your hair is a bit crap’ yet men think that’s sort of thing they’re perfectly entitled to comment on and act like we’re being over sensitive if we pull them up.

Too bright for a date? I've worn red to dates, and it's gone down well. (I wear a lot of red anyway.)

Why do the women younger than 30 date those men?

I mean, either they’re attracted to them, in which case who’s to knock it? Or there’s a less romantic reason that reflects well on neither party.

It was as a neutral colour dress with an orange geo print. Nothing out the ordinary.

I like quite quirky unusual clothes so if a man doesn’t like my style then he’s not for me

This does seem to be about who looks best or most attractive, not necessarily who a man would want to have as a long-term partner. And we know that age is highly associated with perceived attractiveness in women, but not so much in men (e.g., silver fox stereotypes that don't really extend to women, and the cult of "looking younger"/anti-aging for women).

We don't know how the research was conducted. If, for example, in the research they asked: what age is most attractive to you. Men might interpret that as a physical thing, whereas women might interpret it more holistically.

This is basically a way to say - OP shouldn't read too much into this. It doesn't mean "men don't want to be in relationships with women over 50 because they're obsessed with women in their 20s".

Over the years I have noticed that men like that are always single. Can't seem to get a girl and keep her. Just sad aging men in pubs going wroooar at any hot tottie that walks in and feels entitled to slag off women who are overweight etc
Yeah I don't worry about them now. They lead empty lives... because the fantasy they hold onto is just that..fantasy.

I nearly choked on my roast potato 😆

These sweeping statements are so ludicrous. Including the one that assumes men in pubs are busy going wrooar.

Oh my Lord! That's very interesting, men really think they're the dogs doodahs don't they?

Have you seen the state of some of the men on online dating. Rab C Nesbitt looks good compared to some of them.

The problem is usually that many men are absolutely deluded fuckers and think that a 55 year old them is peak George Clooney and will appeal to a fit 25 year old woman!

Online dating is a lottery and is nothing to do with weight. The problem with it is that you can’t really build a connection like you can in real life.

😶

This doesn’t surprise me at all I can remember many older men hitting on me when I was in my 20’s

what I can never get me head around is how deluded so many men are

I only did OLD for a few months and I was quite horrified at the state of some of the men who messaged me.

Im a reasonably attractive well presented woman in my 50’s and I was bombarded with messages from very overweight pasty faced slack jawed men 10-20 years older than me who all seemed to think we’d be a perfect match.

I can’t imagine any of these men would approach us in a bar so it does seem hiding behind a screen gives their delusions an outlet they wouldn’t be brave enough to go for in RL

“Men shag vacuum cleaners “ … too funny 😂

To be fair the title of the graph is “A man’s age vs the women who look best to him”

Look best to him, not age he would like to date.

If you asked him what kind of car looks best to him, he would probably name something he couldn’t afford, and he would know that.