Honest opinions ... is a UK 14/16 seen as unattractive for dating as a 50 year old?

[lemonepisode1]

I'm online dating for a while. My face is decent and I'd consider myself relatively attractive in the looks stakes but it is my body that men seem to dislike.
As above , I'm that size, 5'7', proportioned except for a wide , flabby meno belly.Im 2.5stone overweight on the scales.
I weight train and walk and run over the week.. so I exercise every day. Look after my appearance/ clothes/ grooming etc but I really believe it's my body that turns them off .
Honestly, especially to men on here, is that size and body type unattractive to you on a woman who is 50?
What are your experiences and more so, what do you find attractive out of interest ?
Thanks.
Lemon

Doubt it, more like men in that age group are looking for younger unfortunately.

I think I have to sadly agree that age is more likely to be the issue.

Watch this and all will become clear.
(I am a gorgeous 50 something too)

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C9oRbvMIPEE/?igsh=MXRicjMxOHhmbXN1

That’s so depressing and gross.

But I will add, the data comes from a subset of men who happen to be single. They could be single because they have unrealistic expectations of a female partner’s appearance.

There could be decent guys who like their own age, but they are more likely to not be single in their 40s and 50s because they are nice men.

Absolutely. No size 14/16 woman has ever had a date ever.

I can't imagine just being a certain size causes it - personality, job, location, if you have chickens or not will have an impact!

How many men have you dated? OD isn’t like real life dating you need to date many, many frogs before you can hope to kiss a prince. I wouldn’t let the opinions of a couple of men put you off. Just keep dating. Back when I used to date online I’d book myself 3-4 dates a week so I was forced to keep the first one short and sweet - usually just coffees for 15-20mins. I found that helped me filter men much easier

Children 🤦🏻‍♀️

Not chickens! Although that may be a dealbreaker 😂

Chickens no, but an unruly cock might cause issues.

I think age is definitely a factor - men want women who are younger, often significantly so, than they are.

But also, when dating, let's be honest, attractive figures ar a thing. I'd argue that size 14, well groomed, well styled, would not be a huge barrier (within the admittedly smaller pool of men due to the age thing) but size 16 is starting to get trickier. I am size 16. I am not unattractive, I can look good on a night out etc. But I am, without question, overweight. One assumes that while some men would not have an issue with that, some would. And as the dating pool is already smaller, that becomes a problem.

How do the online men know what your body looks like @lemonepisode1 ? If you are fully clothed, how can they tell that you have a meno belly?

If they aren't interested, then they aren't interested and it is unlikely to have anything to do with your meno tummy or that you are slightly overweight. Have you had a friend give your photos and profile a once over? Sometimes what we think looks good isn't always what best reflects us. If you don't want to have a friend look at your photos, then try some different ones yourself to see if a different photo or two might generate more interest. It is so easy to take your own photos now with timers on phones. It is also a good idea to refresh your profile and photos from time to time as well.

I am mid 50s and met DP in my early 50s online. He is younger than me, so don't buy into all the shit about middle aged men only going for younger women. One of my friends is even older than me and also met her now DH online and he was younger than her too. We are both really ordinary looking middle aged women, not so much as a fake eyelash between us!

Yes.

I’d think age not size.
So the 50 yr old men think they can attract late 30s/early 40s.
It’s probably 60s and above men looking at 50 plus women.
Height too. Lots of men don’t want taller female partner.

Are you getting matches/dates?

I think the main thing with online dating is being honest about yourself, and that goes for both parties. Having recent photographs that genuinely reflect who you are today. Do you have some pictures of your whole body on your profile?

It doesn’t make sense to me when men have pictures from 5 years ago before they started balding, and claim to be 6’1 when they turn up to a date at 5’8!

Likewise for a woman who has a slim attractive face to ‘conceal’ if they are curvier or fuller figured.

Be upfront and let the people who like what they see find you.

I'm overweight by about the same amount, I won't date until I've lost weight because I want to be the best me and attract the men I like. It's going to be a long time and perimenopause shows no sign of fucking off either😂.

I don't buy the age thing, it's never stopped me and most men don't want someone much younger than them, they want someone at the same life stage as them in my experience. I'd say I have more in common with a 37 year old than someone who is 57 (and that's 10 years either way).

Sadly this is a thing. My lovely 60 year old friend is constantly messaged by men in their 70s and above looking for a partner. She doesn't want to be a carer so isn't interested.

I was very confused about why keeping chickens was a deal breaker…
14-16 is average size, but I think the whole concept of OLD encourages totally average middle aged men to think only a size 8 25 yr old will do.

Overweight women are not as attractive to most men as slimmer women.

50s men will also be looking at women in their 30s and 40s too so your “competition” isn’t just women your age.

It's the age. I know men who are in their 40's/50's who only date women younger than 30...

"Its your body that men seem to dislike"

They message you and tell you they don't like your body? Hard to believe.

You’re not enormously overweight at that height and you are clearly now leading an active lifestyle and are well groomed so I doubt it’s about your figure.

Confidence is attractive so I’d just work on your own self confidence and perhaps widen your search a bit if you’ve been looking for a specific ‘type’ you never know someone may surprise you.

I met my DH OLD when I was 47 and he was 50. He goes to the gym most days and is built. i was fit but a size 14 except my stomach ( 3 c sections and a 25kgs weight loss), which I had to hide well with dresses. He didn't care. I did have a tummy tuck when I was 49 as I hated my over hang desperately. He seriously did not care care at all, and both his previous long term girlfriends had never had kids and were fit.

But I dress well, am financially and socially independent and fun. That added to my perceived 'value' I guess.

OP, just be you. 'Men shag vacuum cleaners' was my mantra when I felt nervous before dates

I've matched and chatted with several men. They invariably say they find me attractive but I definitely think it's my size . My photos are realistic but definitely i do look better in those photos as I'm dressed up for a night out or on holidays etc.

My experiences with these men are that they are ...

1. Shorter irl
2. Lesser hair irl.
3. Older looking irl.

No exceptions to any of the above.

They're not for me, based on presenting an entirely different bio which is essentially lying as far as I see it.
I think I'm just going to lose weight. I need to anyway and I'm off the apps completely. They're bad for your mental health I think.

It's interesting, for sure !

It's more than likely age, men seem to be under the illusion that a woman 20 years younger them would be best. My widowed Mum tried online dating, she was mid fifties and receiving messages from men aged 70-80! Decided not to bother in end.