Breastfeeding a stranger’s child

[grou]

I was recently told of a friend’s friend who under very specific circumstances was compelled to breastfeed a complete stranger’s baby. I find the concept quite disturbing. Think remote, small airport. One rug shop for duty free. But then again a starving baby is a starving baby.

As far as I am aware there were really no alternative options available.

No need to start insulting or shaming other women who aren't comfortable with it.

Pretty much all of us on here are Western and a lot of us would've had foresight before a long journey to pack emergency formula. If breastfeeding is established, the need for another woman to assist would be tiny unless the mother is incapacitated.

You don't know what the other woman has drunk, taken medication wise nor their hygiene. The most I would possibly understand is expressing into some form of cup for the baby to drink from at a push.

I wouldn't feed another woman's baby as a current breastfeeding woman as I'd worry my own babies supply would be diminished.

Finally, I still find it weird but you do you.

Yep. They were all stubborn little sods who wouldn't give it up easily and I was knackered and just wanting sleep tbh. It was easier at the time co-sleeping and letting them latch on and feed them to sleep than force them to go cold turkey.
We got there eventually but it was a bit of a mare. That's why I don't judge either way. I only judge those that think I was prolonging it on purpose when in fact, I was touched out by the end. Needed more family/husband support (all three DC were weaned quite early actually, this was just a dream feed/habit/comfort thing first thing in the morning/last thing at night and one halfway through the night, oh, and if they were ill but it takes its toll, especially with DC1 as I was also working 8-4).

Huge awe and respect to the posters here who donate to the milk bank.

It's such a generous act 👏👏👏👏👏👏

Also wet nursing is as old as the hills. If babies need feeding it's second nature to feed them if mother can't.

Then I suggest you don’t watch the “Milky Sue” episode of the sitcom Man Down, which I thought of immediately when I read your post.

Even if your baby was starving and you were unable to feed her and there were no other options?

Sure part of the definition of an emergency situation is that it is a situation that is unpredictable and may not have been able to prepare for it. You can’t prepare for all types of emergency situations and sometimes you get caught out.

My sister fed my DD once for me because I was detained and my DD was hungry. My DN was three months older so my sister was producing much more milk…my DD was drowning in it 😂

Another breast milk is disgusting but cows milk from god how many cows in one portion is not ??? Too many women freaked out over breastfeeding … this is very common in the UK grown women disgusted by breastfeeding. I breastfed both my children and once my son was poorly when he was about two years old. he wasn’t eating or drinking much milk , my auntie was nursing her child and my son went over to her and had some of her milk. None of us were freaked out it’s natural … I get that people sexualise boobs but honestly each to their own . Mind ur business if it’s that bad .. I still nurse my youngest he turns 3 next week. And I’m proud of myself and would happily feed someone else’s baby or donate milk, as long as I produce milk. It’s natural. Women should be more ashamed giving their child cows milk or formula milk ,in my opinion.

there is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a 3 year old. My eldest stopped at 3.5 and my youngest is 3 next week and still has milk once a day. And eats lots of food. Both my children are healthy no exzema , never had ear infections etc… very healthy apart from the occasional cold. Nursing up to age 3 continues to boost immune system. Also research done which suggests breastfed children have a higher IQ in the long run. Not to mention health benefits to mother…No post natal depression. Amazing bond with children. Lowered risk of breast cancer…. Formula milk is awful and women who chose formula /cows milk over natural milk and don’t even attempt to breastfeed or at least pump is shocking to me … more shocking than BF a young child ..

I would absolutely do this

I breastfed for 7 years in total and I wouldn't be happy to do this. I wouldn't be happy for my own dc to be breastfed by anyone else either. Breaatfeeding was an intimate act for me, with sacrifices made for the benefit of my own dc.

My nanna fostered babies in the 60s. At the same time as having her own. She breast fed all the babies.
My mum wasn't able to feed me after I was born as I was very unwell.
She fed other people's babies as she had plenty.
In the situation described in the OP I would have helped if I could.
I don't find it odd or weird, but that is just my opinion.

If it was consensual then there’s nothing wrong with it.

Definetly not weird …. You’d only find it weird if you’ve sexualised breastfeeding

My paternal grandmother did wet nursing. I feel it is a kind thing to do for a baby in need.

I'd do it.
I remember once learning about a community, sadly can't remember where, which had mothers swap babies to help new mums and babies learn to BF. So if a pair was struggling, the newborn would be fed by an experienced mother so she knew how to position baby to latch and had plenty of milk, and the sleepy newborn got fed, and newborn's mother would feed the few months older baby who was wide awake and keen to latch and would help stimulate milk supply. What a fantastic solution.

This is how I feel.

Been slammed by a lot of other posters so thank you for wording more effectively how I feel about it.

Expressing milk is completely different as it takes away the intimacy in my opinion and it’s just food. Those comparing cows milk - I don’t suck on a cows udder.

My sister and I breastfed each others babies. It’s just milk - no big deal. I would have fed a strangers baby in those circumstances.

66 years ago, my mum gave milk to a premature baby up the road from us. She was glad to do it. I am glad she did it.

this would be fine with me! I would do it to help and would be so grateful if someone helped me with if I were in a situation with a hungry baby.

But as a breastfeeding mum I also wouldn't be watching someone else breastfeed my baby. Because if I'm there to be able to watch it I would be doing it!

If I was away and couldn't get back for whatever reason and someone fed my baby of course I'd be grateful. I would express milk into the freezer for that eventuality though. If I was looking after a friend's breastfed baby and there was an emergency I'd also happily breastfeed their child. But I'd check with them and only do it after making sure they didn't have some of their own milk stashed somewhere.

I'm very pro milk donation if you can. I think that milk really helps especially premature babies. But, as someone who has chosen to breastfeed, I also wherever absolutely possible would be feeding my own baby my own milk. Not least because he has a million allergies that I've had to eliminate from my diet too otherwise he gets sick!

Really? Surely they would have needed your consent for this.

Not sure if this has been mentioned yet but I have heard that women’s periods sync with those close to them because it would then mean a higher chance of getting pregnant at the same time and so that if one woman died in child birth then the other mother would be able to breastfeed the child. It’s a very old old myth that is meant to date back to cavemen times when women would die in childbirth because of a lack of modern medicine but it makes complete sense to me. Our bodies are bloody clever so I don’t doubt that. Personally I don’t know how I would feel about a random stranger breastfeeding my child because of risk of infection but I would have donated my breast milk had I been able to do it isn’t really an ick factor.

I think it's fine as long as bio mum knew about it and consented to someone else feeding the baby.