Breastfeeding a stranger’s child

[grou]

I was recently told of a friend’s friend who under very specific circumstances was compelled to breastfeed a complete stranger’s baby. I find the concept quite disturbing. Think remote, small airport. One rug shop for duty free. But then again a starving baby is a starving baby.

As far as I am aware there were really no alternative options available.

I would definitely had fed a strangers baby if needed. I don’t think I would feed an older child that could have food or other drinks (even though I fed my daughter til 2 years old).

I'm struggling to think of circumstances where this would be necessary, but I guess if the DM of the DC was taken ill or died suddenly in a remote place then it might happen. But this used to happen all the time. Have you never heard of wet nursing? I agree it's far from ideal, as BM is a bodily fluid, so you really need to know that the person feeding your baby is a safe source of milk, but in an emergency, you do what needs to be done.

I think that’s really kind of her to do. I’d also do the same if they needed me to. Wet nursing was a common practice, historically even royalty were wet nursed sometimes.

And livestock were used to feed human babies in centuries past. That’s why they are called nanny goats. Cheaper than human wet nurses and less likely to spread disease.

I BF both of mine, and wouldn’t have had a problem with feeding anyone else’s baby in an emergency. Likewise I’d have been grateful to anyone who did the same for one of mine in such circs.

Talking of such emergencies, I once heard a R4 talk by an elderly woman who’d been snowed in during WW2, with a young baby, on her own, no help anywhere near, her milk had dried up and she had nothing else - except for her German Shepherd dog, which had recently had puppies.

So in desperation she put her baby to the dog, which accepted it quite happily.

At the time when she was speaking, the ‘baby’ was long grown up, a healthy adult.

I do think it’s rather beautiful how mammals will foster the young of other mammal species as well as their own species. There was a story in the James Herriot books about a kitten who was fostered by a sow. He grew up into a very sleek and handsome cat with an unusually glossy coat.

I would bf someone's child if they needed to be fed and there was no other option.

I've read that sometimes if you adopt a baby you can re awaken your boobs and feed the baby.

The alternative being a starving baby….i think I’d go with the lady was amazing for breastfeeding the hungry baby. Would I find it “normal” to breastfeed a strangers baby ok, nope but in this specific example it was a lovely thing to do.

War torn counties and natural disasters.

I read one story where a baby was found and an emergency worker happened to have recently had a baby, BF the baby. I think that was during the Turkey earthquakes.

Would genuinely rather get formula.

Wouldn't have bothered me in those circumstances, either feeding someone's baby or someone else feeding mine.
Totally normal in a lot of countries and in the olden times.

Highly over dramatic when formula is around nearly everywhere.

A lot of people assuming the mother of the baby was incapacitated. I think it’s more like she was a formula fed baby who for whatever reason had no access to formula. This is not a situation exclusive to war torn or natural disaster stricken countries, only two years ago there was a severe formula shortage in the USA, and in the early days of Covid it was extremely difficult to get formula in the UK as adults panicked and bought some for milk for their tea 🙄

If it were a baby too young for any other source of food and I could help then I absolutely would. I wouldn’t breastfeed another woman’s toddler though, that is where I’d draw the line.

My tiny baby was in a different hospital to me (I was ill) so a mum at that hospital, with her own bairn, fed my baby too.
I will never know who she was but I am forever grateful.

Don’t be so over dramatic. Nearly every shop I’ve been in has had ready made formula. I am doubtful someone would let it get to the point a child is actually starved unless they’re in a war zone.

There are lots of things we find disturbing in our day to day life, yet when presented to us in a crisis or life and death situation we behave in ways we might not normally do.

It's similar to being on the Tube and our personal space being reduced to nothing - it that situation it's perfectly OK (maybe not pleasant!) to be pressed up against someone. We change our eye contact behaviour accordingly (subconsciously).
If you're pressed up against someone in the supermarket queue they would (quite rightly) feel quite put out and uncomfortable.

For the last time I’m going to say it, stop being so over dramatic. Unless in a war zone the baby shouldn’t be starved and formula is ready made in lots of shops. 🙄

Massive eye roll to that.

In a developed country there is formula in every shop. I also wouldn’t plan to have left them hours without feeding myself.

@IdleAnimations aren’t you lucky to be somewhere with access to lots of shops with formula. I’m not, I’ve to drive 45mins to get to one, if for some reason there was no way of doing this, and I had run out of formula what would you have me do? Not ask my breastfeeding neighbour obviously.

I wonder how remote this airport was though - maybe somewhere in the middle of Africa or Nepal. Those ready-made cartons of formula are likely not available in every airport.

You're being a bit ridiculous in your responses. There are plenty of situations outside of a warzone where you wouldn't necessarily have access to formula. Say you were somewhere like a remote airport, were going to be stuck there for a number of hours. There aren't shops other than maybe a cafe.... you still wouldn't let your hungry baby be breastfed by another woman because of how it would affect you emotionally?

I don't think it is disturbing at all. Wet nurses were very common in Victorian times.
Feeding a starving baby is never wrong and there is nothing more weird about feeding them human breast milk than there is in feeding them artificial milk from another animal

That’s fair enough. I feel like (unlike the vast majority of posters here who seem to over dramatise) if it’s a desperate situation I’d sort of get it.

I still find it weird though. It’s up to mothers what they do with their children but it’s also okay for other mothers to find it weird!

It doesn’t have to be that remote, I doubt for example you could get formula in Newquay airport?