To think this the most pointless, indulgent gap year possible

[Killiam]

Met with some old friends of DHs yesterday, we aren’t close anymore but we have daughters of the same age (17).
We asked what their daughter was planing for after A-levels and they told us she’s going on a gap year, thinking it would be a classic backpacking trip we asked where she would be going and this is what they described

• First Greek island hopping (for fun and independence)
• Then a wellness retreat in either Thailand or Indonesia (self reflection and stress management)
• Then December in New York (Engage with the culture such as visiting museums, enjoy city life (she already lives in London but okay?) and emerge herself in the Christmas spirit)
• January to March at the families ski chalet (take on courses to help with leadership skills, read classical literature and ski)
• Rest of the year in France/Italy/Spain (culture again, cooking classes and wine tasting)

They justified it by saying she has no interest in backpacking and they don’t believe that’s enriching anyway and they feel this is a balanced way to transition her from childhood to adulthood (plans a degree apprenticeship for the following year).
They think these experiences will give her the final touches she needs to be successful after putting a lot of effort into ensuring she is well rounded (sports, music, language, well read and well travelled etc.)

AIBU to think this is more indulgent, pointless, year long luxury holiday of a gap year. I don’t mind gap years in general but this will be entirely funded by her parents and I can’t see what exactly is going to make it so enriching. Of course she need not actually worry as they also mentioned buying her a flat worth over a million and how she will have a job in either of their businesses should she actually want it!

Wow your white savourism really comes through. Poor people should be grateful for poverty tourism, teenagers using their kids for social media posts and likes, the risks of volunteers abusing them. Did you know in Haiti “tourists” can pay to spend a weekend with a poor child in their Hotel? Even if there is no abuse do you think this is responsible and ethical behaviour? Would you like your child to spend a few days with strangers in a Hotel?

You really need to educate yourself on harmful types of tourism and stop thinking wealthy white people are the saviours of the world.

https://inhope.org/EN/articles/beyond-good-intentions-the-risks-of-orphanage-tourism

https://www.scotland-malawipartnership.org/guides/new-global-citizenship-critical-learning-resources/understanding-the-white-saviour-complex-and-volun-tourism

As ever there's a more nuanced position to be had. The poverty tourism as it was done in the 90s has many problems but things have come a long way.

Giving the opportunity to young people to engage with the world is important, can generate vacations, inform world view and build character. There is no age at which people magically start being helpful.
There is now more emphasis on locally led projects, more informed messaging to volunteers, and better follow-up. Nothing is ever perfect but it takes courage to try. Young people have passion and energy that can be harnessed for good that cynical adults can't find the time to prioritise.

There are still many bad projects out there. Many good ones too and it's sometimes hard for people to know ahead of time.

However, none of this is relevant to the OP, whose acquaintance will, I hope, enjoy what sounds like a fantastic year.

Your base assumption is that I am white? I think it’s you that might have the problem here.

Peadophiles abusing children is completely different to schools building schools in places where they don’t have them due to a lack of resources.

You said any sort of tourism is fine for poor people and I disagree.

Young people can still visit Africa though. Why do they need to volunteer at all? Go on holiday. See the animals, visit the waterfalls, ride the motorbike taxis, eat the street food, mostly importantly spend their money!
There's no nuance at all.

Surely they can do both? Volunteering is fun and at least gives some meaning to your life.

Because it is damaging. They can volunteer at home in a sustainable way once they have acquired some meaningful skills.

Volunteering (imo) is hopefully about providing a helpful or useful service, for free. If it is neither but makes the person doing it feel enriched/fulfilled, then it slightly changes the point of it

There are likely volunteering opportunities in teens home towns that they could get involved with eg litter picking, conservation, potentially helping at a food/hygeine bank etc

Making someone feel fulfilled is a big part of it. They may not solve Africa's problems, but presumably then they will grow up valuing that part of themselves and repeat it many times during their life in other ways by volunteering wherever they live.

It's not so easy to help at a food bank as they have a lot of senior volunteers already, and at mine you need to drive.

I litter pick regularly and I can promise you I'd often rather be in Africa with a group of kids than by myself in the rain on the side of the road with delivery drivers deliberately throwing bottles of piss at me, which happened last year.

You seem to be missing the point somewhat. They certainly won't be solving Africa's problems, they are actively contributing to them.

Of course they aren't. I thought that clever clever concept had gone out with the 90s!

Still very much ongoing. A little research would be wise.

Imagine being jealous of an 18y old!

OP I know you are desperately looking for a way for the year to be dreadful, pointless etc. But I hope the girl has fun! I know a girl who did an Italian cookery course and some of the other stuff you mention too. She is now studying medicine and is the sweetest and most down to earth girl I know.

Mine didn’t do gap years. But there are so many ways to do it. Each with something to learn. Stop the envy.

I did find a sneery article in the Guardian, written 20 years ago.

You haven’t even had the decency to apologise for assuming my race.

I fundamentally disagree that tourism is bad and it’s insulting to the people that live in poverty. That was not my experience at all. Not only did it help bring very much needed income and attract investment. If it is done thoughtfully and under the direction of community leaders, it can be positive and productive. The preservation of culture, traditions and timeless practices should -always be protected.

It had a profound impact on me as a person. I would even say an awakening of sorts, it snapped me out of my complacency and really shaped me as a person, learning from them how life could be enjoyed differently.
How capitalism has affected us here and greed. It was singly one of the best experiences I have had, I became less selfish, more empathetic and thoughtful of others. The idea that travel to countries that may be materially less wealthy but culturally more rich and alive with such history and heritage can be life changing for a young person.

Lovely post.

There's plenty of more recent information out there. Some was linked earlier. There was an extensive thread here not too long ago as well. I can't imagine what you are searching for if all you are finding is a single 20 year old article - choosing ignorance at this point.

And honestly who in gods name would travel there thinking they could ‘solve Africa’s problems’??

I am questioning the level of arrogance and stupidity that anyone could ever even imagine they would be going there to do that!

Hopefully they are treading lightly, and appreciating the incredible experience for what it is.

We have enough of our own problems here to solve…

Get a grip, I didn’t assume anything, I talked about a well known syndrome called “white saviour syndrome” of privileged people thinking they can save others and are needed to fly out to be a hero. Even worse if you have a non white background and think you are the hero needed on the ground. Unless in very specific circumstances eg you are a doctor operating in a war zone.

i know you want to be celebrated for helping poor black kids, I am sure you can use your socials for that. And the idea that poor people are there to enrich and change your life is school book white saviour syndrome.

No longer commenting on this topic, it’s derailing the thread. Thankfully this teenager is not doing any povery tourism.

You are projecting some strange notion that people visit Africa to post on insta! You must know some very ignorant and vacuous people for this to be foremost in your mind.

Has it crossed your mind that it is the Africans that have the most to teach their visitors? Not the other way around. Seriously. I am trying very hard not to be offended by your posts.

Sounds the equivalent of sending your daughter to the old" finishing schools"

My kids obviously would get or even like to do that but then they needed to learn how to deal with the " average joe". Do wonder why people on here think that backpacking is so bloody scary though

Can't see anything wrong with it if that's someones bag

They're is absolutely a need for thoughtful, locally focused and culturally aware volunteering in the country where I'm involved in projects. But the people needed to carry those projects out are not 17 and 18 year olds with a month or two to kill.

The people who are needed are experienced professionals who are able to train local people and create the roles that they will continue when the volunteer leaves a year or two later, with the infrastructure in place.

Here's an example: I'm thinking of the small project I know to support disabled children and their families in the remote villages in the area. The project leader brought out a physiotherapist and an occupational therapist to train half a dozen local women and some of the parents to be able to help the children to be develop physically and become a more active part of family life. Those local women are now training a growing number of recruits.

A respite home has been built (using local labour only, because there is little work available here) and for the first year that it's open, a non-local and very experienced special needs nurse will oversee its development and training of local staff. From that point on this growing organisation will be entirely independent and run entirely by local staff.

That is what volunteering in poor countries is about. Not an 18 year old 'finding herself'. However motivated and caring that 18 year old might be, she doesn't have anything valuable to offer.

The original poster is making the story up as she's going along. I'm calling BS on the whole thing.