To not agree with dh that 160 is extortionate for a food shop for 4 adults?

[Fadedchintz]

I'm recovering from Covid and while I was ill dh and the dcs (over 18, one on gap year and working part time, one here temporarily for a fortnight) did the shopping and cooking, all good. Over the last 10 days they've used up a lot of things. Went shopping yesterday and spent 90 in Aldi and then 70 in Tescos - dd is gluten free so can't get that in Aldi plus there are some branded things we like. I also spent 15! on olive oil which was extortionate but that was 2 litres from Aldi. I use it for cooking and it will last ages. No alcohol, some dog food and that shop will feed 4 for the rest of the week for breakfast lunch and dinner. Lots of things to stock the freezer, chips, peas etc. Tinned Tom's, baked beans, ketchup (both so expensive now - should move to heinz dupes and will do in future). Lots of fruit because I've been so ill and want to eat healthily. Washing powder, flash bleach cleaner (dogs!)

Anyway, dh looked at the joint account and was really shocked and slightly judgemental. Told me we really need to rein in our spending. I felt a bit like a naughty kid.

AIBU not to agonise over a 160 shop? I've meal planned and that is 6 good dinners, 6 lunches and breakfasts for a week. We never have takeaways. We also live a long way from the nearest shop so food needs to last.

We are about 130 per week this week expensive as dd been off for two weeks 159

Wish I was as good as you. 160 doesnt even touch the sides for a weekly shop at mine. Buying tins washing powder oil would send ours right up.

Seems you are organised and thoughtful going to different places.

Assume he does no meal planning and knows how much cooking oil.is and how long it will last. And washing powder!

He is being unreasonable not you

Not these days, no. Is your DH a few years behind on inflation - I don't mean that flippantly, mine genuinely doesn't seem to have caught up and is always moaning about things being expensive.

Yeah don't agonise over it...sounds like it's all needed. You may have been able to scratch a bit off that but not a significant amount. It's what it looks like over a longer period that might be more relevant as we do sometimes do a big shop that covers future weeks e.g. cleaning products and tins etc. Stuff is just becoming more expensive it's ridiculous.

£160 is par for the course for us - 2 adults and DS16.

If he's not doing the shopping, then he nay not appreciate how much prices have increased. I'm often shocked how much the prices are increasing

Suggest he prepares a list and goes shopping himself

Yes £160 is about what it usually costs me for four adults and doing the shop at Lidl.

Omg he is so behind the times. He's getting a bit like an old man. Constantly moaning.

Tbh, he cooked for a week but it was literally chips and either sausages or fish fingers or some pasta. Hardly any veg or fruit and I can't keep eating like that.

Yes, send him shopping. That’s probably the only way he’ll learn.

He is being unreasonable. It’s me and two v littles (who don’t eat much) and ours is about 80-90£ a week and I don’t drink alcohol or buy particularly expensive food. I’m sure 4 adults would be more than yours.
also - planning for a gluten free person is often slightly more expensive.

i would say my food bill has gone up by at least 50% in the last years despite eating more ‘cheaply’!!!!

And the meal planning

I don't think £160 is out of the ordinary for 4 adults (and dogs).

However, it depends on
a) what your household budget for food is and
b) what you normally spend.

If you normally spend £100 and this "overspend" has caused a financial problem, then it's reasonable for DH to comment. Who usually shops? If it's you, surely you know how much you generally spend and if this is within your usual spending habit?

Though I'm sure someone will be posting in a minute to ask are you eating gold plated caviare because they feed their family of 10 on fresh air and grass.

Our food spend has almost doubled over the last couple of years. We spend about £150 a week in total for 2+1. We could spend less if we didn’t eat meat or fish, or if we didn’t have any jars of pasta sauce/Spice Taylor curry kits etc which make it easier to eat well on a busy workimg day. But dairy has all gone up by huge amounts, 33% for our milk a couple of months ago (from £1.50 to £1.90), olive oil has gone up hugely, even baked beans are over a pound a tin now for Heinz.

He does go shopping but all he thinks about is dinner. So he thinks - he's bought a pack of sausages and some fish fingers that he's sorted meals for two days, because there is oven chips and peas in the freezer. Nevermind that there's no breakfast stuff, or lunches, or that someone had to buy those chips and peas.

£160 for 6 days meals for 4 people is more at the "buy what I fancy" than the "planned economy" end of shopping, but whether or not it's reasonable depends on what disposable income you have and what the impact of you spending more than strictly necessary is.

For reference, we're 2 adults and 2 at Uni and we spend about £40-50 p/w when it's just 2 of us, and then around £80 -100 p/w when everyone is home. That's scratch cooked, well planned varied meals. So you could definitely do it for less. But I have the kind of personality that loves planning, and my meal plan is based on healthy eating, variety and economy, so I actively consider budget alongside other factors. I'm also hot on ensuring no food waste, and good at making sure everything stays stocked up at the best prices. But I love a plan, and definitely put more effort into it than some people would want to.

So I don't think either you or DH are wrong. You could do it for less, but equally some people spend more. It just depends on priorities.

It's just one of those stock up shops isn't it? Next week might be £100 but we all have more expensive weeks

For washing powder, you can buy huge ones in bulk online which are usually cheaper
I usually pay for 130 washes around £14 for surf and persil is £21-25 depending on if you want non bio or not

There’s 4 adults here, yes we eat well, roast Sunday, steak and chips, spag Bol, cottage pie, fish fingers and chips, chicken casserole, beef pie, all lunches, breakfasts, snacks, fruit, drinks and veg. We easily spend over £200 per week. I also stock the cupboards as full as possible as I hate running out of things and need to pop to expensive local shop.

It was quite expensive because I had to fill up things like stock cubes, olive oil, porridge oats, tomatoes, cheese (mad expensive).

I spend £50 a week, cat and I, love my fruit

We spend £200 min a week : 2 adults 1 teen 1 tween

I just use Aldi own brand non bio.

I do buy dishwasher tabs from amazon, they work out really cheap.

I think I'm annoyed because I spend a LOT of time trying to be as efficient as possible with food, we barely have any waste, I'm the queen of making something out of nothing.

He's also started going on and on admiringly about how his mum spends very little on food, as though that's a good thing! She needs to spend and eat more, she's tiny.

I don't think that's extortionate at all. My husband does all of our food shopping. I hadn't been since covid and went last week with him and was shocked at the prices. But we eat very healthy and try to buy non UPF and this does cost more money

This is all making me feel better, and not as though I've morphed into some mad spend thrift.

Send him to do the shopping and see if he can sort that many meals for £160. I spent £200 this week on shopping for three of us and will need to do some top up shops food shopping is extortionate these days.