To not agree with dh that 160 is extortionate for a food shop for 4 adults?

[Fadedchintz]

I'm recovering from Covid and while I was ill dh and the dcs (over 18, one on gap year and working part time, one here temporarily for a fortnight) did the shopping and cooking, all good. Over the last 10 days they've used up a lot of things. Went shopping yesterday and spent 90 in Aldi and then 70 in Tescos - dd is gluten free so can't get that in Aldi plus there are some branded things we like. I also spent 15! on olive oil which was extortionate but that was 2 litres from Aldi. I use it for cooking and it will last ages. No alcohol, some dog food and that shop will feed 4 for the rest of the week for breakfast lunch and dinner. Lots of things to stock the freezer, chips, peas etc. Tinned Tom's, baked beans, ketchup (both so expensive now - should move to heinz dupes and will do in future). Lots of fruit because I've been so ill and want to eat healthily. Washing powder, flash bleach cleaner (dogs!)

Anyway, dh looked at the joint account and was really shocked and slightly judgemental. Told me we really need to rein in our spending. I felt a bit like a naughty kid.

AIBU not to agonise over a 160 shop? I've meal planned and that is 6 good dinners, 6 lunches and breakfasts for a week. We never have takeaways. We also live a long way from the nearest shop so food needs to last.

I'm pretty sure it wouldn't feed your family on anything nutritious. I've been keeping a close eye on the weekly bill as a bit an an experiment. Two adults, about 40 meals a week in total including breakfast and packed lunches. We actually spend about £75 for the pair of us for a week on food and a few household items.

You could probably spend slightly less if you were being v careful ( like £20) but no it’s not extortionate for 4 adults. We spend 500 a month on 2 adults 3 children, but that excludes school lunches AND the 2 littlest don’t eat a great deal and we eat out one a week.

Perhaps he needs to plan and shop for the week to remind/educate how much it costs.

This is the sort of thing my husband used to, do OP - lots of niggling little complaints which inferred that my housekeeping skills were deficient. and then I got really sick of it and started biting back. So when he complained about the way I ironed his shirts (many years ago) I completely stopped ironing his clothes, when he complained about the way I loaded the dishwasher, it automatically became his job, when he criticised my driving, he became the default driver and so on and so on. Then when he complained about the amount spent on food shopping, I simply stopped buying all the things that only he ate - bacon and sausages for his brunch, jam, cakes, biscuits, nuts, and all of the various 'one use and he's done' herbs, spices and sauces that he must have whenever he deigns to cook. Strangely enough, he's finally learned to keep his gob shut, I do hardly any housework and my shopping bill is far less since he is now paying for half of it.! I suggest that you do the same!

I think that's pretty reasonable for that many adults in a house myself and dh live alone and I don't spend more then £35 per week on shopping having said that we don't tend to eat more then one meal a day well minus a bit of toast of breakfast we have always been like that

I used to get 2-3 big shops per month delivered from Tesco which cost about £100 each time - the same shop is £150 each time now - this was supplemented by smaller mid-week shops for fresh fruit/veg/dairy, so probably £500ish a month previously........that £500 is now nearer £750.

YANBU. He is only shocked because he doesn’t do the shopping. I cook from scratch and do the big shop at Lidl, and I still easily spend at least this for 2 adults and 3 kids for a week. During the holidays or when we’re hosting people it is way more!

I always thought it’s because to claim a sale / discount price, an item has to be sold at the higher price that they are claiming to discount from for a certain number of days. I think it’s 28 but I could be wrong.

If they increase the price (or at least don’t discount it) for 28 days during late October / early November, they can ‘reduce’ it for Christmas.

Or am I just being overly cynical?

I struggle to keep our weekly shop under £180-200. 3 adults, a toddler & a cat. I think 160 is more than reasonable.

I reckon I spend a grand per month on supermarket shops. That's for me, dh, teen dd, adult ds (who is home around half the month) and 2 cats.
That will include cat litter and food, cleaning products, toiletries. I shop in Aldi and Waitrose mostly and while I'm not super strict I'm also not buying tons of booze and fillet steak either!
I think £160 is really good for all those meals and replenishing the stock cupboard.

Sounds very reasonable to me.

Can you tell me a bit more about what kind of meals you cook for your budget? Sounds like you might have some good tips to share!

No you're not being cynical - it's a well established retail ploy.

Take out the stock cupboard items like the oil, and point out to him that X amount bought 72 ( 4 x 3 x 6) meals, he might feel better about it. Sounds like he's got sticker shock. If you spent 150 (taking out the oil) that's only 2 pounds per meal. Tell him that, and point out what a good household manager you are to be feeding everyone for 2 pounds per meal.

Men. Honestly.

I spend 50-70 a week on 2 adults, 1 teen and 1 child including cleaning products and toiletries. I cook from scratch but budget well too. £160 sounds like a lot to me! Mostly from Tesco but a few bits in Coop if we need top up milk.

Wow. If you can share your menu plan that would be brilliant!

Yes I'd be interested in seeing this meal plan.

What do people buy that cost so much. I have 3 adults and we are maybe 80 to 90 a week.

Anyone who critises how much it costs to feed a family and run the house should have to do it for 1 month. Then have the conversation.

Seems a very normal amount I did about £670 on food in October 2 adults 2 adult kids. Husband was away for one week so saved there, DS2 got free lunch this week too I like a bargian but do buy magnums and treats when on nectar etc I bought blended oil as olive oil is SO expensive now I like to make a pud or cake on a weekend and sometimes bake for others so bits and bobs I could cut out but lifes too short. I go to Aldi, Lidl and Sainsburys

Only if he’s able to time travel and do the big shop in 2007 🙄😂

Sounds normal to me. Even when I do a very modest shop I struggle to keep it below £100 for a family of 3.

That's an extortionate amount of money! Sorry but I agree with your DH; we spend than a month on food!!!!
You don't need to spend £15 on olive oil, you don't need to buy heinz products. And Aldi does a brilliant free from range - it's what we buy!

Shopping costs a fortune. We are 2 adults with child at uni and a cat. When it’s just us we probably spend about £90 a week and DD spends around £40 a week on her own (and eats cheap shit).
DH has found a site called JamDoughnut where you can buy a gift card for your shopping and you get cash back which you can then transfer to your bank when it reaches a certain amount. He can be a real boring twat about it but actually it is really quick and easy to use and it is nice to get something back for what you were going to spend anyway. Aldi, Tesco, Morrisons etc all on it and it’s free to sign up. Worth a look anyway?
(If anyone is interested I can post a link where you get £3 in bonus points for signing up and I get points too as I have an account, but I won’t do it without asking because I don’t work for them or anything!)
Get DH to go shopping with you, or at least be involved in making the shopping list. Then he can see what stuff costs.

You spend £160 permonth for 4 adults? So £10 per week per adult?

Show him the receipts. Food shopping isn’t as cheap as it used to be.£160 per week is my budget for 3 adults and no pets. We don’t eat cheap processed food