Should I shag the 25 year old

[NotmyrealNC]

NC for obvious reasons.

Long story short, I'm 6 months out of an abusive marriage. Not in any way ready to date or for a relationship, I'm still far too hurt to even contemplate that. But I do miss sex.

Last week, a guy randomly approached me and gave me his number. We've chatted a bit, it turns out he's 10 years younger than me. From his messages, I get the impression he's only after one thing.

I'm really, really tempted. I could really do with a good shag. But I'm also worried it could go horribly wrong and leave me feeling terrible. So, please help me decide. WIBU to shag the 25 year old?!

He's not a poor boy, he's a sex seeking opportunist. If he doesn't get it with you, he'll not be shedding any tears, he'll just be trying with another woman.

Go and have some fun. Will be a good confidence boost. You never know - he could be Mr Right Now.

I lean yes on this one.

This is exactly what I need to hear.

I would say dont do it when you are still vulnerable.

imagine if a man was asking the question of whether to try to get a shag with a woman just out of an abusive relationship. I don’t think it would be a universal yes to that.

Sometimes you need time to heal and recover.

Yeah I'd worry about that a bit too.

Imagine if this was an older man deciding whether to shag a 25 yr old woman (and referred to her as a girl) He’d get eaten alive by MN! Double standards much.

Would you see a 25 year old woman dating a 35 year old man as a child in comparison?

Conflicted. Hes 25 so the sex likely won't be good but I still think you should do it to move forward

Imagine a 35 year old man asking on here should he shag a 25 year old woman. It feels so off.

Yes

😂

His age is only part of the appeal because it decreases the likelihood that he'll get attached to me - as I said a relationship is the last thing I want.

I do wonder at the appropriateness of the age gap though.

I’m surprised people find 25 and 35 an unacceptable age gap? 🤔 It’s two adults.

However OP I lean no to this because your post makes you sound quite vulnerable and open to being hurt.

No don't do it.

What on earth would be wrong with a 35 yr old man having a no strings attached shag with a 25 yr old who was also looking for no strings sex? How is it double standards? Both know what they want from it…

Yes if he was a recently divorced blah blah. Op is very clear she’s looking for a shag not dating.

He's an adult, you're an adult 🤷‍♂️

Do it, but make sure you use condoms.

It depends on the person

I've known 40 - 60 something experienced men who were shite in bed.

My acquaintance says her first bf (each others first partners I think) was amazing .... He was really interested in and motivated by her enjoyment/climax.

So age is not important on that front.

I would say that casual sex-ers may not be as motivated as a relationship partner to make sure their partner enjoys it, climaxes etc. though.

I don't think it's an inappropriate age gap (for either sex).

I would think it is a bit wide for a relationship (though it depends on the people etc) big not too wide for sexual encounters ..if both are fully consenting, enthusiastic, not vulnerable etc.

Nothing as long as it's crystal clear to both parties are aware that it's just a shag. But women are generally far less likely to be up for 'just a shag' than men.

If this happened last week, I wouldn't leave it too much longer to contact him though.

If he's in the habit of giving his number out to randoms for sex, he may not remember who you are if you leave it too long.

You don't want an embarrassing conversation where you have to describe what you look like, and where you were when you took his number etc.

The first man I shagged after divorce turned out to be on gay hook up sites behind the scenes. So STDs were an immediate concern - got tested, all fine.

Nonetheless... it was fantastic. It broke the seal, got me past that 'will I remember how to do this' and was deeply satisfying without being in love

Ignore my last post.

Sorry, just realised you're messaging.

😂

Totally!