Is DD weird?

[pastaalover]

My DD who is 13 has been told she is weird by her friends because she showers every 2 days. Compared to her friends showering once some nearly twice a day. They said that she should shower once a day because she is dirty if she doesn't. Naturally this has made her upset and she doesn't want to go to school as she is scared of what they may say. I want to know if she is weird or her friends are being unreasonable.

I'm not gross. I don't mind having a body that farts and sweats and pees. We all do. Showering every other day and wearing clean clothes is fine.

Honestly girls can say these things - they may not be trying to be unkind but just trying to be funny and it can be common for friends to make fun of each other.

I have 2 teenage girls who shower every day for what it's worth but it is simply what they are used to. I don't think they'd smell if they skipped a day and if one of them is tired after a holiday or something, it isn't seen as a big deal. Showering twice a day is excessive unless you do a sport in my opinion. My girls wash their hair once a week while some of their friends wash it every other day and that isn't seen as a big deal either.

Although, honestly, I'd say maybe look into getting her one more shirt for Friday or rewash one of them. I know it might not smell but wearing it all day at school means it just isn't likely to be clean or very hygienic even if it doesn't smell all that horrible.

Yanbu. We don’t shower/bath every day in our house (maybe if necessary in summer), it’s bad for the skin but we’ve just been conditioned as a society to think it’s gross not to. If we smell or are dirty/grubby then we shower or bath, probably once every 2-3 days. My kids have sadly realised that this isn’t the norm so they don’t mention it to friends but there really is nothing wrong with not showering every day if it’s not necessary.

I have a baby, not a teen. No teens in my family. I don't know if anyone in my family would smell because we all shower everyday. Everyone sweats unless you have some kind of disease that stops you from sweating. Layering deodorant isn't great for your skin.

She’s not weird. Some teenagers will find any excuse to pick on someone. I was picked on relentlessly as a teenager despite never doing anything really weird or wrong. The problem is them not her.

It is more grim than weird. Periods, she needs to shower daily. That's what her friends are probably thinking.

I can't imagine not showering daily, but I wouldn't be telling people that's what I do. I guess it's normal in your house if you are asking if it's weird?? I'm terrible for only washing my hair twice a week but it's waist length and takes forever to dry but I shower at least once a day, more often twice, as does my partner, but he hair washes daily too

Layering deodorant isn't good for your skin and neither is washing it every day

There seems to be a blind spot here

And why anyone thinks that it's ok to bully someone because gheir washing habits don't match your preference I just don't know

But if you're the one being subjected to comments and you're 13, you don't think" it's them not me", you believe it is you.
And in this case it may well be her, some parents are blind to the smell of their children and also don't have to spend all day sitting right next to them in lessons. Maybe she does smell, lots of teenagers are much more sweaty than adults because of all the hormonal changes.
There's a very simple solution, clean shirt every single day, good anti perspirant deodorant and daily shower.

I feel very sorry for your son, even on the tiny off chance he doesn't smell ripe by Wednesday he must feel bloody awful. I had a mother similar to you, she didn't consider basics like washing and clean clothing necessary. I spent my childhood/teenage years feeling generally grotty and itchy in places I didn't want to know existed.
You are probably lining your son up for a lifetime of confidence issues (I am definitely overly clean now and wash jeans after every wear because I remember feeling dirty and I most definitely smelled terrible)
It extends to my house which I keep immaculate at all times, the loo, kitchen etc are cleaned daily and I feel panic if I see dirt on the floor.
All because my mother left me filthy as a child.

Ummmm…..no! 🤣 Your DS (and you?) need to see a doctor about your digestion issues!

You are one of those poop don’t stink people.
Good for you.

This is getting ridiculous! What if they told her her breath smelt and she was weird for only visiting the dentist twice a year and only brushing her teeth twice a day? Obviously, her breath really must smell, right, because teenage girls never say anything mean or untrue to other girls, so clearly she needs to go to the dentist every month and take a toothbrush to school so she can brush her teeth after every lesson - makes as much sense!

”Weird” is a teen comment on everything. Don’t like chocolate? Weird! Haven’t been to Spain? Weird! Favourite colour is green? Weird! Don’t like cats or dogs? Weird!

Yes. This.

Er, no 🤣 I’m one of those many people who don’t leave ‘poop’ smeared over my arse (or arm) when I go to the toilet!!

Daily washing is certainly not harmful, what a load of rubbish 🤣

We’re not talking about a full body exfoliation, face mask and pamper every day, but at the least washing under arms/face/genitals should be done daily. Not just for smelliness but as a basic hygiene routine.

Haven't read the full thread so it's probably been mentioned but if your dd has started her period I would really be telling her to shower daily on those days op. Period does stink especially in the heat.

Most people shower every day if going in to work / school. I have two baths a day. I bathed the children every day when little. I think you can alternate day hair wash if you want to but I'd say it's more usual to shower daily yes.

No weird is obviously not kind not sure why you are focusing on is she weird / that's childish talk.

There are a lot of threads lately with an odd tone. I mean it's obvious isn't it her friends think it's more normal to shower at least once a day! It's not so hard to understand their viewpoint.

Mother/step month of many teens - ours all shower once a day but some are smelly boys and two are very vain girls. I wouldn't necessarily think it odd though if someone didn't have one though - depends what they've been doing.

It’s literally just one of those things teen girls say/do to seem ‘better.’ Oh I shower everyday, I’m so hygienic/feminine/dainty/a princess/desirable. They latch onto the most random shit. Your daughter made the mistake of being to honest, it’s not rewarded as a teen.

You maybe conditioned by I am not, it isn't something I endure, I like to have a shower.

Why does a simple preference warrant sich sexism?

Maybe encourage her to shower daily. She’s at that age when she will need to. Am sure she doesn’t smell but at the risk of being picked on if someone at school can smell her, I’d encourage a daily shower! She can then go to school and say she didn’t realise it was weird but now she showers daily! No one wants to be known at school or anywhere as the smelly one!!

Kids fine… adults need to wash every day. Not 2-4 days! I barely sweat but after 2 days I would have an odour for sure!!