School harassing us over attendance...

[1993baby]

A bit of backstory..
This school is obsessed with attendance.
Last year in reception my daughter was hospitalised and really poorly. The school were calling me every day asking when she would be back when they knew she was in the hospital! I remember sat by her hospital bed and getting called from the school.
Then when she was discharged, they were coming to our house every day to “check on her progress” basically harassing us in to sending her back to school.
She was only 4 - under compulsory school age.

This continued any time she was off with illness.

Now...

This year DD had chickenpox and was off school for 2 weeks, she was really poorly with it and ended up in A&E dehydrated from being sick constantly. It took 2 weeks for her all of the scabs to scab over. We followed NHS and GOV guidelines about staying off until the scabs had healed.

Then immediately after, she got tonsillitis.
She couldn’t even drink water and we ended up at the out of hours. He prescribed antibiotics and said she had a really bad case of tonsillitis.
He said to keep her off school to rest until she feels better. She has been off a week as she has been really poorly with it.
I’ve taken her back to the GP two times as she seemed to get worse.

I informed school about all of this.
However when she had chicken pox, they were calling me even on the second day of illness asking for an update on when she would be back?
the GOV advice says AT LEAST 5 days..
so how are they asking for an update on when she would be back when it’s only been 2 days, she’s in the infectious period and it was actually impossible for her to be in school according to the rules.
It was just ridiculous.

Then 2 people from the school came round to our house to give us an attendance warning letter!! She had chicken pox.

They then asked us to send her to school with chickenpox.

Today, the GP told us that school has contacted them about her absence. They have asked the GP for confirmation of illnesses and told them to encourage her back to school?!

Apparently the school have now flagged this up as a safeguarding issue because she has been off a couple of weeks.

We went to 2 doctors this week and both of them said the same thing about school attendance, so it must be permanently on her health record now?!

Are they allowed to do this? I thought they had to ask my permission to access her medical records?
She has been off with genuine illness and been to the GP more times than I can count on two hands in that time period ! It’s hardly a safeguarding issue?! I kept the school updated and informed.

The GP asked me “how is everything at home?” So the school has obviously flagged a safeguarding with them which is totally unfair and I feel disgusted by the insinuation they are making here.

I walked out of the GP’s room in tears I was that upset by it all...

What can I do?
Can I get this taken off her record? :(

The UK must have seriously bad attendance issues at school. Australian here and its nothing like this!

Obviously the concern is whether your DD is really ill or that you are making this up and instead there are issues at home. When tragedies happen one of first q is why did no one notice, the school are taking their safe guarding seriously as they should.

Totally normal for tonsillitis, sadly. I had it repeatedly as a kid before they whipped them out. Had to spit into a bowl.

They certainly didn't at my sons school.. we called up with chickenpox and was told "yes it's going around, he'll need to be off the rest of the week" I sent him back a week later 🤷‍♀️ still with the odd mark on his face

It sounds like they are findng the sickness level unusual. If the gps are asking you if your okay ask them why. I did have a friend go through something similar but i dont actually know, it was very serious escaleted to a section 37 36 or something. I dont know how ut was resolved do know she got a lot better.

Move schools - this one is mental.
they are attendance officers not the gestapo.
I would also put in a compliant and raise with parents and governors meeting. This is a disgrace.

I was pursued by the EWO and LA re two of my dc - not at the same time.

The first one had OCD, the second had bad hormonal issues and an element of anxiety / school refusal.

In both cases I got a warning (which is the minimum outcome in all cases) as they realised that the issues were genuine and I was trying to get them to school / make sure they got there on time.

Nothing on my record or my dc’s.

It was stressful though, especially the first time round.

In your position OP I would formally complain to the governing body and change schools.

Uk compulsory school age is actually 5.

When I had it, actually severe strep throat, back in 1976, I had to spit my saliva into a bowl for the first two days, until the antibiotic shot started working. After I could swallow my saliva, I could only swallow mild liquids for about a week. I had to let baby aspirin dissolve under my tongue for pain relief and had to go off to the doctors to get antibiotic shots since I could not swallow a pill.

Not sure why you are being so obnoxious and rude to the OP. Everything she said is right on and has happened to many people. Just because it hasn't happened to you, doesn't make it not happen to others.

I had to do the same thing, and I was an adult.
My tonsils were gone, but I had strep so bad, my throat was red raw and could not swallow anything. I carried a bowl around for two days, until the first antibiotic shot started helping. Then could only swallow very bland liquids for a few days. I had to keep going in for shots for two weeks.

I would change schools and I would also complain to the very top about this school.
It is absolutely correct that they "check in" but this behaviour goes beyond the pale

I nearly died from chickenpox complications as a 7 year old after someone came back to school too early with chickenpox. I was ill at the end of term, for the entire summer holidays and the first half term of Y3.

These schools putting pressure on for an early return make my blood boil.

Perfectly put! I really hate love when people act like they are medical professionals when they are basically clueless. Some children get ill, and bounce right back. Other children might have a period of time when their immune system takes a licking and one infection will follow another.

I totally agree with the vomiting emojis for that poster. So very rude and unkind. Makes me wonder about them.

I think the school is OTT, not the mum. Common sense is so rare nowadays.

Put everything in writing . After a visit do a follow up email to the head of x an y made a visit today. X request dd return to school despite being day two of chicken pox. This goes against your sickness policy which states......

Everytime.

Keep a log and if it gets too much make a complaint.

Keep a diary of your daughter's illnesses day by day with lots of detail. Include photos for evidence of say spots on arms. Contact your surgery and ask for a letter from them or evidence that you have taken your child even if you have to pay for the letter. Keep a diary of all the times the school has harrassed you and ask for it to be in writing from them as you are keeping evidence of what they are doing and then go and see the head teacher and bring this matter to the board of governors and ask for an explanation. I was a teacher myself and my child was so well looked after, that if someone had done that to me I would by now have contacted a solicitor and also the local education authorities to ask for an explanation about this kind of behaviour as it was not conducive to my child's recovery. I suppose a lot of it stems from these tragic stories we see in the news about children being badly treated but it is overkill. Maybe they have had a case at this school of a neglected child so are taking these measures to avoid another issue, but you need to have that explained to you in writing.

And chickenpox? My kids are late teenagers and I have literally never seen a case of chickenpox - thanks to the vaccine. Is it not taken up in the UK?

So GPs can share information without consent for safeguarding purposes.

But actually this a good thing for OP as SS will shut it down quickly as it is a non issue.

Hi, I don’t know the policy at your school but at my kids school you have to call every single day and repeat they are ill and will not attend giving the reason. You cannot just call the first day and say they have chicken pox and will not attend for 5 days. I am guessing it must be the same policy at your kids school which is why they called you the next day asking why. As per my understanding this is to do with safe guarding so that they can confirm they have made contact with you and verified that your child is still ill.

Is there more going on here? Because it seems pretty unlikely that a school would have the resources to visit a child's home every day after a hospital stay....

The UK does have bad attendance issues at school in general. This does not excuse harassing people who have had a GP certificate for a known illness that has been about for centuries.

OP, if the school is not responding to a formal complaint made on your behalf by a solicitor, then look at the next stage of the process.

it is good she has been flagged.
they are following protocol
i appreciate your daughter is ill but there have been terrible cases in the headlines so it is good there is protocol.

Why are you on this chat? No, the UK health service does not provide the chickenpox vaccination. Most kids here get chickenpox in the first years of primary school.

Why am I on this chat? Because its a public forum? And yes, if the UK doesn't provide the vaccine for chickenpox then that is very shortsighted imo

For those minimising chickenpox, that’s BS. My son had it at 2, absolutely fine bar a couple of days itching. My DD had it at 5 and she was really poorly - it took her 3 weeks to recover from the impact of the viral load. She went back to school after 2, when I thought we could modify other things (more sleep, little exercise) enough to reasonably get her through the day. Chickenpox is vile and I’m so glad children are offered a vaccine now.