So we’ve talked and I’ve cried.
His points were that he’s done his utmost best not to wake me. He’s not been sleeping well and is laying awake with sciatica early in the morning, so thought it would be better to get up and move than stay in bed suffering. It just seemed logical to get an extra workout in.
He said that he’s doing the protein shakes and eggs because he doesn’t want to put extra cooking on me. If I wanted to make something protein rich and lean, e.g. chicken, broccoli etc then he’d definitely eat with me. He can’t be bothered to cook this for himself, which is why he’s done down the route he has.
He said that sleeping outside the bedroom was a suggestion, as he can see how tired I am. But he doesn’t really want this. He was just desperate for a way around waking me.
He said that he enjoys the gym, but not when it’s busy. Hence the very early mornings and late evenings. He didn’t realise the amount of time he spent there bothered me.
He said that since our youngest started uni, the house is so quiet and it feels like we’re not doing much. So the gym also is something to do, and is helping him get back into his suit.
He’s said that he can’t promise that he won’t get up in the morning, as he can’t lay there in pain. But he won’t set an alarm to get up and he won’t go to the gym in the morning. If he does wake and wakes me up to, then perhaps we can have coffee and a walk if the weathers ok.
He’s going to continue going in the evening. I asked about another women, as this thread raised that as a possibility. He seemed shocked and said that he wasn’t: that the gym was empty and he’d take photos and send them to me if I felt I needed proof. I said it was ok, but he’s sent me pictures of an empty gym this evening regardless. I’ll attach a DH share.
He apologised. Acknowledged he’s going a bit nuts in order to fit in his suits, but he really doesn’t want to buy more. The event is with clients who will be judging him. He wants to feel confident.
I’ve said that I’ll cook healthy lean protein rich meals every day, so he has good food in him. He was grateful. He told me that if I’d like to, he’d buy me a gym membership so I can go with him in the evenings, and we can both get out of the house.
I feel that communication has only been possible this evening, one because I had the confidence in what to say to him from reading advice. Two because he saw me upset and crying. Three because it came to a head.
We’ve hugged and I feel better now. I’m going to have a bath and an early night, because I’m extra exhausted now. Tomorrow I’ll stick to my word and I hope he sticks to his. I might also take him up on his offer and join the gym in the evening, although I’m not sure I can be bothered to do two hours ☺️