Not allowed private room

[Spamfritterss]

for my birth I made it clear I wanted to pay for a private room. When giving birth 3 weeks ago I had a bit of a traumatic birth and was told I couldn’t have a private room with bed for my husband due to needing an extra eye kept on me. I was put on a noisy ward where I was placed at the end by the window the row of beds next to me all had their curtains partially closed so you couldn’t see me unless you walked down. I didn’t have someone keep an eye on me I had checks but no more than any one else. My husband and I had been awake for way over 15 hours so I sent him home as one of us had to get some sleep. The ward was full of people and partners chatting all night as well as crying babies. All I wanted was to be alone with my husband. I had no clue what I was doing couldn’t move properly and spent the whole night crying over what had just happened to me. 2 of my mum friends have just given birth and where able to have a private room. I just feel really resentful. I get they thought it was medically necessary but no one could see me and I didn’t get any extra checks

Depends on the set-up. Before OP posted again, we didn't know if it was private as in an enclosed room staffed by NHS staff, or private as in non-NHS private company suites, with private, dedicated non-NHS staff circa £500+ per night.

They're absolutely dreadful places to be. I wouldn't be able to stay on one without a baby and at the height of my physical fitness without coming out like an absolute shambles the next day. When you've just come out of a long labour and you desperately need some rest, they're literally hellish.

It is not some cosy ITV sitcom with mothers sitting up in bed in full makeup knitting and gossiping while all their little darlings sleep in lovely matching blankets. It's messy, noisy, chaotic, and unpleasant.

Maybe you try to have a bit of compassion?

@Spamfritterss ignore the nasty buggers who get their kicks out of being vile. I hope you feel ok.

Yes, heaven forbid you knew what you were talking about before charging into a debate like a bull in a china shop.

So as a mother, I don’t?
🤔

You don’t like facts, do you.

I had a similar birth to you OP and also sent DH home but I was put in a private high dependency room with 1:1 midwife care. Your experience is why I am bloody grateful not to have to rely on the NHS any more.

Oh no, I'm sure you invited a brass band around to parade around and serenade you and your newborn to sleep. That's what new mothers need, right? Loads and loads of noise and disturbance.

Personally, I recommissioned Concorde to fly over so I could ease myself into motherhood. I know some prefer the traditional cymbals and strobe lights, but I thought nah let's get this party really started.

Is this the one at Pembury ? Apparently there are only 3 NHS hospitals like this in England .

Oh dear!

You’re quite highly strung aren’t you lovely?

No, I just gave birth, fed my baby, empathised with mothers of non sleeping babies.

To imagine that a hospital could accommodate 3 new mothers in private rooms, is somewhat unrealistic.

Anyway, it’s not going to happen, so make your decision on further births based on that?

@kimchiketch I hope the care is better on the maternity side than it is in the actual hospital

What year was this?

I'm sorry... I don't know any Maternity Ward that doesn't kick out partners so people and babies can rest/get sleep.

If I ever have another baby, I'll have it in 1990 then! Sounds lovely.

It’ was a ward with lots of other mothers, sone with crying babies (imagine). But of course you deserve a private room?

You’ce for far too much time on your hands, but what difference does it make?

Are the precious more deserving today? They need a private room? The other mothers in a ward have babies that cry more? Really?

If it wasn't a hospital ward in 2024, after fourteen solid years of Tory neglect, then you haven't got a clue.

No, women do not deserve to be subjected to that. And how much of a lovely time you had in hospital last century doesn't come into consideration.

This is normal in many hospitals. Even private rooms that you pay for are not guaranteed if someone else needs it or there's a clinical need to keep you on the ward. This should have been explained when you first enquired though.

I'm sorry you had a difficult time though. I hope you and your baby are doing well

Hi op,

All the women in the ward would have needed the same thing as you and it is for the staff not to be walking and walking all night to get these checks done.

I think it is a little bit unreasonable to expect to have a room alone above having the proper care and to be in easy access should anything happen.

If possible, maybe second time around have a home birth? Or you need to pay big bucks and go where you can have a private room despite these potential checks. I bet that if you’d extra extra care, they would want you and babe in hospital though…

Birthing is quite the thing. Focus on your health. Focus on your babe. Don’t keep a bad memory coz you weren’t alone in 1 room.

Good luck 🌺

Your condescending posts just make your arguments even less credible. Your experience does not equal everyone else's. It was also a long time ago - Your children are older than me and I've had 2 myself. Things have clearly changed a lot since then, and no matter how much you try to make people look silly, it doesn't negate their experience. You really don't seem to get that people not thinking the exact same way as you do, doesn't make them wrong.