I hate being ignored in shops and worry it's due to being a middle aged mum!

[iloveshetlandponies]

Went in JD sports earlier with one of the DCs . We were looking for Uggs for me and converse for DC so I was going to be spending a good £200 or more

Stood there for ages trying to get someone's attention so we could try some on and got completely blanked and ignored by the teenage staff. It wasn't even busy in there, I'd understand it more if it was

Ended up walking out muttering to dd that perhaps we'll try John Lewis instead as you get better service in there . Which made me feel even more middle Aged

Absolutely Fuck middle age and the way it makes us completely irrelevant and invisible . It really makes me feel shit . Left the house today feeling like I looked pretty good as well. But Obvs not

🤣🤣

So did you actually ask any of them??
On a busy weekend being staffed by 17 year olds you’ll need to use your voice.
I’m mid 40’s and do kind of get what you’re saying but it’s is at least partly on you to make sure that you get what you want. Go up to them, speak to them and get them to do what you need.
I actually think I’m getting more visible as I get more grumpy and less likely to put up with crap as I age!

I hate it ...and I'm defo in the hate it all the time camp

I used to be young and very cool and sexy. I am NOT ready for this shit 😩😩😩

I'm 36 and got ignored in JD recently. But I used my voice and got the (expensive) trainers I wanted. Although he did also try to sell me crease protectors. I think my wtf face told him I'm too old to care about my trainers getting creased 🤣

I've experienced it too, we went to Rio in Durham, the restaurant was quite quiet and we asked for a table for 2, the young girl looked us up and down then said sorry we don't have anything. When we got outside I said to DH do you think it's they way we look, we don't fit the demographic. I was quite upset.

I'm in my early 50s and haven't noticed any difference in how I'm served in shops as I get older. If you want assistance you need to be assertive and ask!

I've been in JD sports before and the boy has disappeared mid serving

He apparently went for his break instead of bringing me the size I needed.

Trying to catch someone's eye in any situation is daft, you're not flirting for a date. Just speak directly to them.

I can't be bothered with this sort of "oh it's because I'm a frumpy old woman now boo hoo" sort of attitude. Just crack on with your life and talk to people.

Oh god I love going into a shop and being totally blanked by the staff, some places are so fucking overbearing, I know what I’ve gone in there for as I’m NOT a browser at all, so I just want to get what I’ve gone in there for, pay and get out asap. If I need something I’ll just go and ask. Other than that, I don’t want to be pounced on and questioned about my shopping habits thanks. I usually leave my headphones on as a clear indicator not to bother me!
I went into a couple of sephoras in France recently and got followed around the shop by a security guard in each one, I got in a huff and turned around to the one in the second shop and said I was too old to steal stuff and stomped out of the shop again.

😅 what the fuck are crease protectors? They'd make a mint selling them for people's faces.

I think they're what young people put on top of trainers so they stay "box fresh". I may have googled them to find out... 😳 😅

I haven't really felt this at all really. Those shops have always had crappy service even when i was young. If anything i feel i get better service, possibly as I'm feeling more confident as a middle aged woman with real cash to spend (as opposed to my younger poorer self). But maybe i stick to the shops with better service??

Why didn't you ask?

This is so shit I'm sorry

DH and I had similar a couple of years ago in a bar in London when we were out for his 50th

Shitty horrible people

Like they won't one day be "old" (aka over 30)

It's definitely not just you OP.

I have poor self esteem and when people are rude/ ignore me in shops/ treat me as invisible it really upsets me. Even though I tell myself it's not me, it's them. Even though I tell myself not to let it affect me.

Funny isn't it that at the beginning of Covid lock downs the message was all about being nice to each other and people started saying hello, at a distance, when out for the allowed walks and generally being pleasant with each other in shops. It didn't last!
I think one of the lasting effects of covid is that people lost the art of being civil to each other. And that combined with all the stress of the cost of living crisis etc means people no longer seem to care about generally acknowledging each other as human beings and being courteous.

I have noticed this. Almost seem surprised when you ask them a question whilst they try to move around the store undetected.

I don't think it's your age just a complete lack of customer service skills and awareness seems more common.

I was ignored in M$S at the currency exchange by 2 staff having a chat about the computer, didn't even look up or say hellow. After 5 mins I knocked in the window and the woman said 'Yes, I'll be with you in a minute' then they proceeded to talk for a further 5 minutes, I would've walked away but was picking up an order.

JD has always been like that though. Not enough staff and they just don't want to be there. I've often wondered how they even manage to sell the shoes, it's impossible to get a pair to try on without waiting more than 40 minutes most of the time. So I don't go there anymore unless DC beg me.

I also agree with this.
I HATE being accosted in shops by sales staff. It makes me deeply uncomfortable and want to just turn around and leave.
If I want any help, I’ll ask.

In fairness, if you own a shop and get money from what you sell then maybe how much a customer spends is meaningful but if you work minimum wage there is really no difference between customers apart from which ones are rude (usually those with more money who think younger low paid workers are beneath them) and those who are alright. (often the least well off are most understanding and remember to say basic things like please and thank you)

Working in a shop doesn’t make people your servants. A polite ‘excuse me, can I please try these shoes’ may well have elicited some good service.

From what I gather, most retail staff are just trying to avoid getting assaulted on a daily basis nowadays.

And remember that if they all look under 21 they will likely be earning 8.60 an hour and probably on a zero hours contract.

One time in Sports Direct, I felt similarly ignored. I took the item I wanted help with and waved it in front of the sensors until the alarm went off. They soon came running.

You say “Excuse me could I have some help please?”

Exactly.

JD Sports are notorious for having staff that ignore you, they are even known to run away and hide if you speak to them

There has to be someone there to say it to...