To laugh at the request to be godparents

[Woollypullover]

My friend's daughter, who we've been very close to throughout her life, has asked me and DH to be her baby's godparents.

We're both atheists and of course, therefore, didn't have our own DC christened.

She knows all of this, but still asked.

AIBU to think this is a ridiculous request?

None of my business. Far too many people on this thread seem to be policing other people's choices in a way I find really distasteful.

The people who get to decide whether to have a christening, a secular equivalent ceremony or nothing at all are the parents. No one else's opinion matters one jot. If you are invited to attend or to be a godparent you get to say yes or no. In some cases the parents want a religious ceremony and the people they want to be godparents aren't religious. This is totally fine if everyone involved is willing. If someone isn't willing there's no obligation to participate.

Yes it is actually or it’s meant to be. If you’re not religious have a naming ceremony instead. The clue is in the name. Good on the op for not wanting to be a hypocrite,

If you live in the UK you live in a Christian country. Our laws are based on Christian ideas of right and wrong, on the Ten Commandments to Moses and the two commandments of Jesus called the Christ (which are love God and love your neighbour as yourself). Our head of state is also Supreme Governor of the Established Church, as well as the third part of the legislature (the doctrine of the Crown in Parliament), and head of the armed forces, to whom they, and all the country's services (police, armed forces, the judiciary, MPs, civil servants etc) swear allegiance - which is our guarantee that a government cannot become a tyranny. That head of state is anointed to God in the ritual and rite of coronation, making him or her a sacred person. The greatest festivals of the Christian year are celebrated publicly and marked by ritual and the closing of businesses and shops, too. Thus, a Christian country - and one very tolerant of other religions, too.

I wouldn't agree to being someones Godparent, as I am not a Christian.
in my own, Pagan religion, Oaths are a big deal, and I can NOT make an oath to help raise a child to believe in a religion that I don't believe in. I can't push a narrative I don't believe in.
I couldn't even swear to push a child into my own religion, as I believe it's a personal journey, and not one that should be pushed on people by others. you have to make your own exploration of your spirituality and make your own mind up.
I COULD swear to help and guide a child to explore their own beliefs, but not to push them into any specific way of believing. in fact, I'd probably love helping them learn about lots of different religions, different mythologies, different religions etc, and give them as much material as they could want to help them decide if any of them feel right to them. but to guide them into a specific religion, no way.

I mean, if I was invited to one, I just wouldn't join in on that part. just like I wouldn't join in praying to their God. I'd be happy to be a guest and support them, like I am at religious weddings (although I can barely remember the last church wedding I attended)
you don't have to join in with those things.

and I don't need to renounce the devil any more than I need to renounce Anansi or Loki. because I don't believe they exist.

If laws are based on the ten commandments why isn't adultery a crime?

People are free to do what they like. But one atheist asking another atheist to take part in a religious ceremony is odd.

and also, I AM religious. just not a Christian. so I would decline, as I'm not going to swear to guide someone to follow a religion I don't believe in.
I wouldn't even do that to follow the religion I DO believe in, because I believe it's a personal journey that we all need to explore for ourselves. children shouldn't be pushed to believe particular religions over others. we grew up being told the stories of greek, roman, Egyptian, Celtic and norse Gods, along with the stories of Christianity. none of them were told as being real or not real. they were all mythology. if any of them rang true to us, we were free to explore that.

Yes, this.

they're asking them to promise to guide their child in Christianity. they're right to decline.

Not really. They’re asking her to take part in a formal service in church. Being an important person in someone’s life and being a godparent might be equivalent in some respects but not all. Non religious people have no business getting their kids christened. Smacks of an excuse for a party and gifts, and all round being a bit dim

as a Pagan, YES. exactly this! I respect the beliefs of others enough not to think it's okay to lie and pretend to swear an oath to a deity I don't believe in, but means a lot to other people. it's FAR more disrespectful to pretend than to just say, "I don't believe in that"
we had a handfasting. I'm Pagan, my husband is interested but not deeply invested in Buddhism. I made my oaths before my Gods and ancestors, and the family and friends present. he made his before the family and friends. he made no oaths to my Gods, as he doesn't believe in them, and that's as it should be. an Oath to a being you don't believe in is a lie.

Why? we're a multicultural country, and Christianity is not the native religion.

so he made an oath based on lies.
I'm not Christian, but I hold a lot of value to oaths. and that's breaking one.

Yes it is. HTH.

The Anglican arm of Christianity was literally created in England, how native do you need it to be?

Where did Christianity begin? Clue, it's not the UK.
We had religions before Christianity

I could be wrong but I thought you had to be baptised yourself to be a godparent. It's not a religious thing after just like an aunt or uncle. I would do it as its an honour to be asked and I'm not religious but it's for someone close to me.

No one said it’s always been Christian.

But it is now.

If your response is to laugh at this request, you would make an awful, god parent anyway
it’s an honour to be asked
I’m not religious, and my son has 3 “god parents “
two of which have no religious convictions
that’s really not what it’s about ,
feel sorry for your poor friend tbh
step away and please do it with some grace ffs

I'd graciously accept this, as I have done for three babies so far. I'm an atheist, all the kids I'm godmother to are from non-religious families. It's just a sweet request to be a special person in their kids' life.

I know what it is. I’m a godmother myself. My point was that Instagram was not around in the 80s.

Hi op,

you are stuck in a religious mindset. It means she cares deeply for you and would entrust you with her baby should anything happen to her and dp.

Certainly not something to laugh about.

That post doesn’t make light on your affection towards her at all. It seems that your opinions are more important. If you don’t want it to be taken that way, I suggest you show your respect and love for her by accepting, being willing to stand in a Church if needed. No they won’t drag you every Sunday in it after that. I would thread carefully if you want to keep the friendship.

If you need to, clarify the expectations.

Good luck 🌺

Only a minority of people in England and Wales describe themselves as Christian. If the people of the country don't believe in it, we're not a Christian country, whatever the King or the Archbishop of Canterbury thinks.

It was a Christian country. It's not now.

It is was a crime until fairly recently and it is cause for divorce, since it shows complete breakdown of marriage, which is why it is a sin because it is a complete breaking of trust between a couple.