To think this is exclusionary?

[DoNOTShakeItOff]

My DC attend a fantastic state primary. The head is like a pseudo mum to every DC in the school and the teachers are, so far at least, fab. Down to earth & approachable, like the head. There's absolutely no backstory or history, it's just this one issue that I need to know if I'm being ridiculous about. I guess this is more AIBR than AIBU!

The PTA. Now, if I was to guess I'd say a good 70% (if not more) of the parents at the school just happen to be middle class, given the area. Plenty of sports cars & Bentleys etc (I'm not saying any of this out of resentment btw as I've grown up round here and it's a fairly frequent sight). It is what it is, you get that in many areas. I helped out the PTA once and they're alllll clearly very wealthy people. All of them.

Trouble is, I regularly think they forget that this is, after all is said & done, a bloody state school! Not a private school. So not everyone is wealthy and still quite a few kids (my DC included due to my disabilities), receive pupil premium. Again, it is what it is. Our situation has arisen since DC arrived and was entirely unavoidable and not of my doing. Hence why DC go to state school and not private school.

Here's the issue - Twice a year, the PTA put on this 'Ball' for £60 a ticket and the flyer says this is open to all parents & staff. £60!

So obviously those of us who can’t justify £60 on a school event, don't buy a ticket. We just have to see the photos on social media of the staff, PTA & other wealthy parents posing in ball gowns at the local very prestigious 'hall'. It has an air of "This is what you're missing out on, paupers!" - I'm not the only parent to feel like this, btw. A few have commented on how exclusionary it is.
Also, this is whilst us 'paupers' get a £2.50 kids disco in the school hall and a bag of crisps. AIBR?!

I know I'll simply be declared 'jealous' by narrow minded posters looking for a pile on, but it's not about jealousy! It's so much more than that. I could afford to attend without much issue but I would never, ever attend any school event that excluded other parents based on cost. Even if I was driving around in a Bentley instead of my KIA!

But any event that has a charge will exclude some parents. The £2.50 disco may be a stretch for some. Where do you draw the line?

Presumably this event makes money which all children in the school benefit from?

The thing is, the purpose of a PTA is to raise money for the school and provide fun activities for the children. The social events you are talking about will probably raise a lot of money which will benefit your children. PTAs aren't there to facilitate parents' social lives although I know a lot of parents use them for that purpose.

No the price covers the cost of the event! I asked if it was a fundraiser - nope!

@JSMill It doesn't raise a penny for the school

Our school has the option to gift a ticket when you buy your own for things like the school disco. Could you suggest it? Then hopefully the really well off parents can buy some extras and more parents can attend. Also all school activities incl PTA are half price or free for PP children.

An event you said you can afford.
I think the where do you draw the line question is spot on. This is only 2x per year and I think you are reading too much into photos of the event.

That does seem extortionate !

But the £60 ball will raise more funds for the school than the £2.50 disco and benefit your dc. If you have rich parents then the school needs to tap into that. I’m more angry about the price of school photos.

That’s even worse!

That's bonkers it's not a fundraiser! Even shave £5 off the cost and you've raised a decent amount. Add a raffle or secret auction and you're laughing. And if it is a fundraiser you'd probably get suppliers offering things at a discount. I'm actually shocked they're allowed to run this. It doesn't benefit the children in any way.

but it’s not!

It's a lot of money but they must be selling enough tickets and raising enough money to make it worthwhile.

If the money raised is benefitting all the children as the school then it's probably worthwhile.
It's really difficult for a PTA as you can't have events that please everyone.

Can you or the other parents that are not happy volunteer and organise a cheaper event. A lot of people in my experience are happy to complain about PTA events but don't want to get involved. Apologies if that's not the case with yours.

I can suggest it but they'll just think that I myself am after a freebie! Like I said, I wouldn't attend on principle.

Nothing at this school is free to pupil premium DC. I'm having to pay £50 for my DD to attend one day of a 2 night residential (she can’t stay overnight for personal reasons) and no discount for pupil premium apparently.

£60 is about what a works Christmas party costs for even us plebs so I think OP is getting all offended on behalf of others (as she said she can afford it herself).

As I've said a couple of times now, it doesn't raise a penny for the school

I can’t imagine a pta organising an event that’s not raising funds. That is not the role of the pta so I wonder if the op is mistaken.

@ToBeDetermined Only because I receive PIP on top of my income! I'd much rather be healthy and have even less money but, the fact is that because I'm severely disabled I do have an extra small income that I wouldn't otherwise have and other Pupil Premium parents may not have. That's my point!

So why does the pta arrange it? That’s not the role of a pta and makes no logical sense. If it doesn’t make sense it’s generally not true.

Yes I agree, maybe the ticket price covers costs but surely there’s an auction, raffle, money spent on the night on drinks etc to raise money? Why would they just put on a ball for parents and teachers?

If it's not a fundraiser then what fundraising do they actually do?

We struggle to.get enough people to organise fundraising events. No one would do it if not raising money.

What's the maximum price for an event you think is non-exclusionary?

Even if the £60 purely covers costs, I can imagine part of the networking of this social event involves staff & PTA sweet talking parents into donating money or time for the PTA. So it will indirectly raise money.

Yabu…

£60 is honestly about the cost of any average night out

You could find the money to attend once a year if you wanted…

It definitely does not raise money for the school as they had a huge debate about it and decided that doing so would make the price even higher so they turned it into 'The Big (School name) Night Out'

Rich people - ball
Poor people- disco

DD’s school have these but they are actual fundraisers, I can afford it but I just don’t want to go so I don’t. If it’s just a big get together for the parents I would just ignore it, it does feel like it’s exclusionary, they perhaps see it as a party with friends so they don’t realise it’s expensive for just hanging out with school parents.

I have no idea why they would bother if it’s not a fundraiser. I would put this in the ignore box, if they moan about attendance you can point out that £60 is a lot of money for some but otherwise I would just not pay attention to this.