My mum has bought DD a dress knowing we won’t like it.

[Glasscabinet]

It’s DD first birthday soon and my mum has asked me to collect an outfit from hers ready for DD birthday.

My mum was laughing as she said that neither me or DH will like it/to our tastes but in her eyes it’s lovely.

What planet would I dress my DD, on her first birthday, in an outfit that caused a round of laughter over.

One hand I could be polite and pretend that DD got it dirty or I could straight out refuse to accept it.

What a waste of money and material. If anything I’m actually quite annoyed.

I personally like the dress, I’d lose the headband and socks otherwise cute!

It’s lovely

It's hideous. Truly hideous.

Good job it wasn't you MiL or folks would be on here suggesting you go NC. Honestly, it's not to my taste but I don't think your DM was being disrespectful, I think it's meant as a bit of fun. Just get the pics then put Lily in a boiler suit if that's what you prefer. But be prepared, she may well choose to wear things that make your toes curl in years to come. You can always blame grandma.

Why can’t you just say “no mum, she’s not wearing that. End of.” What will happen? Do you usually let her walk all over you and that’s why she’s doing it again now? It’s so disrespectful and controlling to purposefully buy something and try and manipulate you into making her wear something that she knew you would hate. And it’s fucking weird that she seems to take pleasure from the fact that it makes you uncomfortable.

Lilly would be uncomfortable in the skirt part. just put her in it for a quick photo

Cute little dress

By taking a photo, your Mum wins.

Just give the dress back and inform her that YOU as the child's mother will choose what YOUR child wears on her birthday.

and not to waste her money in future.

I think the issue here is more your mum thinking she gets to dictate what your daughter wears on her first birthday? Why does she think her outfit choice overrides yours as her mother? If your mum wants a photo with your daughter wearing the outfit fine, but it doesn’t have to be at the first birthday party does it!

It really is ghastly. Its like she’s deliberately chosen the most hideous tacky garment she could find to test how far she could push the OP.

Id have to say ‘sorry but she’s not wearing something I hate’ and leave it there. Otherwise those buttons will keep being pressed and next years outfit will be even worse - if that’s actually possible

and remember Christmas comes before her next birthday...

what hideous outfits can she buy for that ?!!!!

Hi op,

It is tough to put boundaries down.

« ah, thank you but I actually have an outfit »
« Ah, thank you but dh picked up one he likes more »
But, don’t worry I will put it on and take some pics for you!

Remember, if you want some kind of babysitting, childminding, you are going to have to ket her decide a few things. A dress is not much so compromise :)

It is new for both of you. Give it time, and boundaries!!! Until you can say « No but thank you », and it is respected.

Good luck 🌺

It’s so cute!
It might not be your taste, but when my dc were one, they often algae a change of clothes so your dd wouldn’t need to wear it all day.

Your dm loves your dd so much that she has bought her a dress to celebrate her first birthday.

She's worried it's not to your taste, and is at least acknowledging that, but got so excited she bought it anyway.

It's not that deep. She obviously loves it. I'd just accept gratefully, wear it once for a picture, then pass it on to charity where some delighted recipient might think it's the best thing ever.

Or not.

I get that it's wasteful but in life you pick your battles. No point losing a supportive relative over a tasteless present.

Mine was happiest in jeans and a t-shirt even at that age. A previous generation would've said that dress is very lower class 😂. It's not my taste either. But cute photos then your choice is the best way around it.

My parents and my in-laws often bought outfits I disliked and would never had chosen. But we either dressed and took photos to send or dressed them in them when they were seeing those people. I couldn’t lose much sleep over it to be honest.

It’s not my taste either, but I wouldn’t say it’s hideous, it’s not that bad.

Like the other posts, just take some photos next to a birthday cake, say thank you, then change her if you want to. I wouldn’t say it’s a big deal, Nan probably loved it and had a quiet chuckle to herself wondering if you’d like it.

The issue isn't about the dress itself but your mum insisting she buys something for your daughter to wear on a special day knowing you won't like. I get it. I've had similar. But who cares really? They're wasting their money not yours.

Just put her in the dress and take a picture to share but change her for the birthday day itself in what you choose as she's your daughter.

I’ve never had a mum and mil is a narcissist. But go ahead and get upset that your mum bought your daughter a dress 🙄

Oh, stop it. People are allowed to find things annoying about their mums or MIL’s despite others who may have worse circumstances.

I can see why you don't like it! It's ghastly, and impractical. Can your rather silly but one hopes well-meaning mum get a refund on it and then can you choose clothes together, hopefully that you both like? (or at least don't object to).

I'd ask if you were blind but that is obviously not the case!!!🤔
All I will say is what Kenny Everett might have said... 'It's all done in the best possible taste' 🙄

In what universe?! 🙄

Sorry but that's very much a matter of opinion?! Personally I think it's tacky and not suitable for a young baby and if the OP thinks the same it's unreasonable and selfish of her Mum to expect her to put her baby in it...🙄

That wouldn't reassure me at all and 5 minutes would be too long! 😱
Whether it's 'cute' or not is subjective and the OP has the right to refuse to put her baby in the dress and the mother has to understand and accept this.
The fact that she knows the parents will hate it makes it far worse, I could never knowingly buy anything as a present that I knew the recipient would hate, that's just selfish...🙄