to not want to go on holiday with DH as he’s taking Pot Noodles?

[Astridastro]

Hear me out on this, we are off to Italy in a month, a lifelong dream of mine, I had visions of long leisurely lunches and dinners, great Italian food and wine aplenty.

Food on holiday has always been a contentious issue for DH, he believes eating out is a waste of money and would rather sit in the hotel room with a Pot Noodle (seriously). On one holiday he actually went to a supermarket and bought all these pound noodles to try. Now I’m not for blowing money on fancy gourmet dinners but I like to eat nice, good healthy food. We’ve gone all inclusive and that’s usually a great compromise.

So this time I was informing him of the Italian tradition of eating late and it being an event, courses taking a while etc etc and he’s been so annoying about it saying he wants to go to McDonalds or he’ll just have Pot Noodles. He like to eat at 12 noon for lunch and 5pm for dinner on the dot, he eats very fast too. He says he’s going for the sights not for the food.

So I’m contemplating leaving him with his sad Pot Noodle and just taking the DC put for a nice meal on my own. It’s the way he keeps going on about it to get a rise out of me.

Not the same at all.

I live in Canada and our food in North America is not comparable.

That said depending on where you are you'd miss out if you were in New Orleans. New York also has incredible food. California has gorgeous healthy restaurants as does Portland.

No one goes to the states though for the food. Italy is known for theirs.

The concept of noodles was Chinese and then stolen by the Italians.

Traditional English food was pottage ( root veg eg turnips, swedes and carrots, peas) The wealthy are meats with no veg.

Potatoes were taken from Americas.

Pasta became popular in the 1980s as did curry.

The idea that Italian food is just pasta and pizza is ridiculous. That’s the equivalent of Italian fish and chips. There are so many different dishes but you have to go to more expensive restaurants.

Obviously a pizza is not decent unless cooked on a wood burning oven and a decent pizza chef has learnt their trade for some time.

My son is ASD and hated to go out at night so we brought back cheeses, fruits and bread , salad mozzarella etc. Going to the market was a lovely treat and we also bought a bottle of wine.
Slightly better than Pot Noodle ( full of chemicals).

You could agree to alternative - evening in and evening out.

@Ginmonkeyagain thats a very narrow view of you think everyone who works has a 9-5 job and a commute? Nowadays there is a thing called working from home and flexible working! DH is usually at his desk (in his home office) by 7am (he works with people in different time zones) so he is usually finished by 4-4.30 at the latest. I am usually also finished work around 4. Some other people do shift work and different patterns of working away from the usual 9-5. DH probably needs his evening meal at 5pm as he’s been up since 6am at the gym/run and been working since 7am.

I just don’t think he’s very good orientated, he sees it as fuel not as a pleasure, to him it’s a waste of money and time. I’m the opposite sadly. The Pot Noodles are a contingency really if he doesn’t like the local food. We always take a travel kettle everywhere as I never compromise on my morning and night cuppa and I hate coffee so the cappuccinos won’t be for me.

bout ONLY compromise is-one of his sightseeing-is you eting proper food. you tolerting his mnky preferences(which fortuntely arent time consuming)he goes with you,taste /order food is optional(for him)
Believe me, I sent my 15 yo ds1 to his dds to sty(overnight)when he mde pot noodle one time//never have i ever.
IF he is so self restrictive with food youze needy gree on compromise tht mens both eat

I agree with @Josette77 no one goes to the US for their food, it’s worse than ours 😀 I do love a mooch around Walmart though the cereal aisles are something else, sacks of brightly coloured cereal and the crisp flavours. I love supermarkets abroad 😀

He sees food as fuel not pleasure? A Pot Noodle is surely the worst of both worlds.

Blimey I would struggle with this as picking where to eat is part of my holiday- husband has a friend like this though- once said to me that he's not bothered about nice meals out as food really is just fuel - whereas I'm not interested in things like old churches etc - guess we are all different- just leave him OP to his pot noodle and go out with the kids

With lovely Italian grub 😱 I can't understand why you would.

Personally I would consider it a very big problem. I can't imagine dating someone like this for very long.

It is not just about eating out, although that is something I enjoy. I also love cooking and trying different cuisines and eating with friends. I would despair of someone who was so restricted in what they will eat and who just consider food to be fuel rather than an enjoyable experience in its own right.

😂

Can he at least take the "Pot Pasta"? You can get carbonara and bolognaise. That would be a nice compromise.

In my experience restaurants in Italy (maybe Venice excepted) are very accommodating about what you want to eat - just a starter? Fine. You want to share a pizza? Fine. Your little brother can only eat plain roast chicken? Fine. You walk into a restaurant in Rome, famous for its offal dishes, and explain that you are both vegetarian? (Slight consternation, followed by immediately and solicitously pointing out at least five things on the menu you can eat). Fine. There’s no reason why your DH couldn’t come out with you and try this or that even if he did feel too suspicious to order a dinner (DONT let him pinch all your food though).

I think the thing that's a bit sad is that meals are about far more than just food - it's the social aspect which is just as important really. For example, I love going out for dinner with DS on holiday, he still is thrilled by restaurants (especially in Italy where they love kids) and will happily chat away about the day or what we're going to do the next day which he wouldn't do if we were just mooching around the hotel room. It's a big part of the holiday for me and I'd feel quite bereft without it.

I would honestly not holiday with my partner if that was his behaviour. I adore the sights but also engaging in the culture and food. Especially as Italian food is widely enjoyed.

@Astridastro Oh I understand non 9-5 work. Mr Monkey works in retail and used to work in transport.

I grew up on a farm where work started at 5am and in summer would not often finish until gone 9pm in summer, but 3.30pm in deepest winter

My parents still didn't have dinner at 5pm.

Italian food is way more than just pasta and pizza. Much of Italian food is simple dishes using local ingredients of the highest quality. Beautiful fish, fruits, cheeses, cured meats and vegetables.

He eats dinner at 5pm? Is he a child? How is he even home from work in time to eat dinner at 5pm.
🤣 Because everyone works a 9 -5..

Sorry but just had a laugh! Watching
'The Force : North East' and the lad who was in the police cell was given a pot noodle! 🤣🤣

So you knew he had problems and food anxiety. How is spouting about Italian cuisine going to help him.

YABU.

Leave him to feel comfortable, or... Make his holiday a misery.

I love that someone has changed their username to @PotNoodleInItaly 😀 and someone else has said that I obviously waited so long for a man that any man will do, all I need is a LTB I adore Mumsnet sometimes.

I do know what will happen, we will be out and about (this has happened before btw), I’ve said oh I’ve heard about this place that does delicious X I’m going to get one, he’s like I’m not I’m getting say chips. So I get the most delicious dish and he’s sitting there with his skanky plate of little chips from the freezer eyeing up my food, gives a bit he’ll say I’m like no, get your own and then he bloody does! Bet it happens in Italy too he’ll eye up a gorgeous carbonara or something steal a bit of mine then order his own, then declare it’s amazing and he wants to come back every night!

We do actually go out for meals regularly and he does eat Japanese, Indian, Chinese, Thai etc after first declaring he didn’t like it!

You both need to compromise. He can sit and be pleasant/have a bit of bread and a drink while you enjoy your meals out, and you can let him enjoy his Not Foodles in the hotel without being rude about them.

Food issues are so complex and deep-seated, you can't shame or bully someone into changing their tastes. I used to be snotty about fussy eaters, but I've learned so much about people's sensory and psychological relationship with food in recent years, I am much more laissez faire now.

I'm so amused your family trundles around Italy with pot noodles, kettle and tea bags, and thinks Walmart = American cuisine. Have fun on your holiday!

What do Italian people who are neurodiverse or not like "foreign muck" eat?

Is he Irish 🥴