to find it unnecessary to blame the menopause for needing a dog to get out of the house?

[Skipsurvey]

watching the dog house
for example, this was a scenario

and i am sure there are other occasions when women have said Due to the menopause they now have anxiety for example
it seems unnecessary to overshare in this way on this kind of programme.
willing to be explained why i am being unreasonable for disliking this oversharing in an otherwise unrelated area.

And many men die of prostate cancer because they think that needing to urinate more often us just 'getting older'. I've worked with men who only went to their GP when it was far too late. Actually talking about ' sensitive' issues might well save lives.

Isn’t that what that Grumpy Old Men movie was about?

Yes actually I do think more awareness needs to be raised about male aging issues too, having had a relative die very painfully from prostate cancer because he thought his symptoms were just part of getting older.

If you're of a sensitive enough disposition that talking about natural body changes and functions upsets you, that's entirely a you problem.

Well social media has partly led to a huge shift in sharing personal details and there’s certainly a gender dimension to this.

One argument is that women are more altruistic and so prepared to make themselves more vulnerable by sharing personal information (eg menopause sysmptoms) in order to benefit other women. And of course media of all types (digital, TV etc) further incentivise sharing with clicks and views.

Men are less likely to talk openly about their vulnerabilities to benefit either themselves or others. And as we live in a patriarchy, where most decision makers, legislators, leaders and bosses are men, that’s the respected norm.

Edit - this is a reply to @SoNiceToComeHomeTo ’s observation

Yes, I think your thread has demonstrated that admirably.

I watched this last night and it opened up a conversation with my daughter I probably wouldn't have had.

I really felt for the woman

oh very clever, very typical response, are you calling ME ignorant or who?

Oh, they are happy to give vaginal oestrogen - can't have a woman not physically ready for sex, can we!

Basically, having a dog that you love and connect with is good for your mental health/mind/soul, which in turn can nourish the body and help with many ailments, or lessen the psychological effects of them. No big surprises there.

Not if we keep talking about it and sharing experiences. Then most people will know, just like in pregnancy, when men have heart conditions, gout, arthritis. I'm out and about in pubs, I've never not heard men talk about their health. No-one ever told men, since I've been old enough listen in, to shut up because they aren't the first man it's happened to. Unlike when the women around me talked about what they were experiencing, periods/pregnancy/post birth. Whole families used to pander to mens moods. They were let off in court becauseit isn'ttheir fault they can'tcontrolthemselves. But luckily now post/going through the menopause women are now in high places and we all need to do our bit to further our cause.

This is such a good point. Noone tells men to keep schtum because creaky knees happen to everyone as they get older.

Having a dog also gives you a reason or need to go out into the fresh air at least twice a day and walking/being outside is proven to help a wide range of mental health difficulties. Yes you could just go for a walk, but having a dog which needs exercised means you HAVE to go for a walk.

These sorts of lifestyle changes can be all that's needed for some women to get through the menopause, or for men to deal with whatever issues they are dealing with. And that's great. But the message needs to be heard loud and clear that if lifestyle changes are NOT enough or don't help at all, then that doesn't mean there is something wrong with you, or that you are in some way failing.

@Blanketyre tbf, some of us (myself included) aren't ready give up our sex lives. It's appropriate that we have solutions and it isn't assumed that we are done with all that, because we aren't fertile and God forbid anyone still finds us attractive.

Oh I totally agree and love my Vagifem! Just a side swipe at the fact that they will happily hand it out.

I think to be fair to @Blanketyre she means that women are generally prescribed vaginal oestrogen without the battle associated with getting patches or gel. Because the medical profession put more value on a woman's ability to have sex with her male partner comfortably and without getting repeated UTIs than on her mental health, aching joints, etc.

Yes. When I went to my GP originally for HRT, he was dismissive of brain fog and hot flushes. As soon as I mentioned low libido he prescribed HRT!

I can recommend magnesium for we es in the night. I was going three times a night and it stopped in three days.

Magnesium also helps anxiety brain fog and sleep.

is a menopause symptom rationing your words?! It would really help if you put a bit more meat on the bones with your posts.

"Admit to it" is an interesting phrase to choose. Would you use the same wording to discuss other health issues?

Would you openly "admit" to migraine or arthritis?

Is it the menopause that you wouldn't admit to or the anxiety?

So you are on HRT, but think a sad woman getting a dog is some huge moral failing. OK then.

I developed anxiety, thought I was going mad until I saw/read it could be related to perimenopause. Same with the unexplainable rage and brain fog. So glad it isn't brushed under the carpet and discussed openly even on a programme about dogs.

I'm usually the most laid back and chilled person you could meet. But perimenopause sent me completely the opposite and I thought I was losing it or getting early onset alzheimers.

How is that this woman’s problem?

If someone said they were anxious after a robbery would you assume everyone has it?

I really don’t see how needing a dog due to the menopause is over sharing. Sounds really healthy that she was happy to talk about menopause and had identified a way to help herself through the challenges she was facing.

Ok everyone who gets a dog needs to understand what that entails but that’s a wholly different thing.

i didnt even say that?