People on this group!

[professionaloverthinker]

Is it me or are more and more people on here just being fucking nasty for the sake of it?! Honestly if you have nothing nice to say to people that are genuinely looking for some advice because they haven't got anywhere else to turn just keep your opinion to yourself! It really isn't hard to be nice!

@professionaloverthinker it is because you are in AIBU, there are so many other boards on here that lots of posts fall under but for some reason people started posting here for "traffic" instead of in Chat or on the Relationships board. Far more supportive responses in there.

Hide this board, don't engage with it.

@mugmeblanketoff I don't even understand what posting for traffic means 😂 sorry I'm still to understand the terms people use on here haha

I disagree. I don't think there's huge amounts of nastiness on MN. Healthy debate, constructive criticism perhaps. It's not a support group. It isn't therapy.

It’s across all social media tbh.

There’s plenty of people online who wouldn’t dare say anything in real life but feel brave behind a screen.

Lots of pedantic, unhelpful responses that make you wonder why they’ve even bothered responding.

Then you get the trolls - they’re most likely not very happy people. I honestly think the best thing to do is ignore them, they are clearly looking for a reaction.

Edit: Best to report trolls or anyone being really nasty & twattish, rather then getting in a bun fight with them ( as I feel like that’s what they want/like) and they always derail the thread.

I agree OP. I was once called a bad mother who is failing my kids because I rent by a poster on a thread here, and then 2 others joined in. I've seen many threads on here where people get nasty comments just for asking for advice, and there is just no need for it at all.

Is your OP “nice” @professionaloverthinker ?

Personally I find the lack of intelligence among people posting online to be the biggest issue, but that’s very much a me problem and when I reach that stage I go offline. This is a you problem, it’s time for you to go offline for a bit too.

The fact simlar threads like this come up often show its an issue.

I get it quite often. I don't often report myself because the comment gets deleted. I like it to stay there so there can see how silly the poster is.

But sometimes once one poster has said something nasty others will join.

@professionaloverthinker posting for traffic means a lot of people are going to see your post. If you scroll AIBU board you can see how many pages of posts just get posted in one day. A lot of people like a bun fight and are drawn to this board. It is why I tend to avoid it.

To all those being professionally offended by the OP, you maybe didn't come across the poster that I read (and reported) last night.
It wasn't banter. It wasn't a robust challenge. It wasn't sweary. It was designed to attack a clearly distressed and vulnerable OP. Over and over again, and yes those posts have been removed (thanks Mnhq).
If they had been aimed at me, no harm would have been done. But they may have had profound and real effects on the OP.
So yes, you may be bored by the number of people asking if it's got worse lately. But you know just maybe so many people are asking the question, because it HAS got worse lately.
In society generally, and AIBU is just a local symptom.

People have been saying it’s worse lately for a couple of decades (or more). It feeds into that oh so unhelpful nostalgia for simpler/older times. The world needs to move forward not constantly be looking back.

Are you lost?

This is AIBU, duck.

Chat’s that way>>>

Or just skip straight on to Flouncer’s corner.

ta ra

And those should be reported to MN and dealt with - this thread is about a wider brush.

Bullying is not acceptable in any form, but to call out "people here" as "nasty for the sake of it" is tarring a lot of users who aren't mean.

But how many of those people saying it’s ’got worse lately’ have been around on Mn long enough to have a meaningful basis for comparison? Of course there are profoundly unpleasant attacks. There have always been. It’s a large anonymous Internet forum, and one frequented by a disproportionate number of people who admit themselves that they struggle with relationships, are socially withdrawn, anxious, misanthropic and/or friendless. Sometimes there will be a good reason why they fail to get on with other people. Sometimes that comes out online.

And yes, obviously report cruel attacking posts.

What does swearing have to do with people being unnecessarily rude on threads?

If these threads are weekly, why have you had to go back four and five years to find examples?

Call it out when you see it. Everyone should. It's very quickly becoming completely unacceptable.

I didn't find that poster's comments pointless. These threads do appear nearly every week, there is no need to keep rehashing it. The poster you're slating also raised a valid point about asking why the OP and others continue to use MN if they don't like what is posted.

By professionally offended do you just mean disagrees with? Maybe you are the one proving the OP's point because you've resorted to insults straight away.

@BobLemon thank you for proving my point by commenting on something just try and be funny. I'm sure you could of gone about your day without the sarcastic comment but here we are proving points 🤷🏻‍♀️

"Wow thanks for your input", "why are you here"

That's up to you if you think that's not rude. Multiple people have called that poster out.

I was showing how they have been here repeatedly over the years, and it was a quick google search where I copied some examples

If you are giving examples, its best to get a wide range.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5163649-why-are-so-many-people-nasty-to-each-other-on-here

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5006010-why-are-some-mn-so-vile

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4981235-to-think-there-are-a-lot-of-nasty-people-on-mumsnet

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/other_subjects/4985665-why-are-some-people-just-horrible-on-here-i-could-cry-for-some-posters

Just a few from this year @iblamethedog . If you use the similar threads feature at the end of the pages you can find even more. And this doesn't take into account all the deleted threads.

Don't just quote half a sentence. The actual question was if you don't like it why are you here? Which is a valid question. I don't use forums that I don't like the tone of - I don't create threads criticising the members, I just stop using the forum.