GP reception made a mistake and then gaslight me

[Pointedy]

I was expecting a gp appointment today over the phone. However, there was a mistake and apparently the gp called yesterday. I did see some missed calls but I don’t pick up unknown numbers as my number is clearly on a database used by fraudsters (get a lot of fraudulent calls from call centres. I rang up and informed the receptionist there must have been a mistake as when I booked i made a note that the appointment would be on my ex wedding anniversary. I immediately put the appointment in my phone as I am not good with dates.

I explained and the receptionist refused to believe me and said it’s easily done blah blah. Asked why I wouldn’t pick up a call. The next appointment is in 3 weeks.

I have terrible anxiety (the issue I was calling about). For the past 6 months I have had constant butterflies. And it feels like the night before sitting an exam all the time.

what can I do? I guess I could pay for a private gp but not sure they would give me the old medication I was on. I had a psychiatrist who I gradually stopped seeing due to agoraphobia/complete giving up on life. My gp would fill out the scripts this psychiatrist sent. Not sure a new gp would want to prescribe me pregablin which is highly controlled.

I get we all make mistakes but I really need help

She didn't "try to gaslight" you. Obviously either you or the practice got it wrong, but short of inventing a time machine you need to accept the new appointment and also ask them to keep you informed if anything sooner comes up.

And answer your phone!

That's not what gaslighting is.

It was just a mistake by either one of you.

I didn’t get it wrong. The receptionist was gaslighting by inferring I made a mistake.

I am very unwell mentally and being proactive for the first time in months.

I struggle to speak on the phone with strangers as it causes anxiety so only answer expected calls

All you can do is take the next available appointment

I don’t think I have it in me to be this distressed for another 3 weeks

First of all, take the appt in three weeks time. Make the receptionist aware that you would appreciate being told if they have a cancellation in the meantime.

Then consider what else you can add, to support yourself in the interim.

That absolutely isn’t what gaslighting is, and overuse of this term really minimises the experiences of people who are victims of this form of abuse.

I understand you are in distress, is there a crisis number you can call?

you hear that I can’t go on and you choose to tell me off?

As others say, this isn't gaslighting and in future answer your phone then you won't miss potentially important calls.

Go to your nearest out of hours GP.

The last three GP surgeries I’ve been with kept a certain number of appointments back for emergencies. Do you know if your surgery has this? Their website might say. If so, I’d suggest calling and asking for an urgent appointment.

Mental ill health is as important as physical illness. Best of luck.

Call 111? Out of hours GP?

Call a crisis line, e.g. the samaritans.

You may also be able to find an online therapist very quickly through e.g. better help, but this will obviously cost money.

The only thing a receptionist can do is write a verbatim note to a doctor e.g. patient says they booked appointment for xx date.

If you need to see them sooner the you need to tell them you don't feel you can wait 3 weeks and ask if you can be seen sooner.

Bit easier said than done isn’t it? I’m basically agoraphobic.

In my county Mindline offer 24/7 telephone support and have links into both primary and secondary mental health support services. Have a google to see if this is an option in your area?

I would phone back and explain to the receptionist how awful you are feeling. Don't pull any punches.

Oh darling. Xxx

you may have additional mental health services you can refer to directly. Have a Google and see what’s in your area.

I think you need to say you need an emergency appointment as you are fearing for your mental health, also try some of the helplines mentioned.

Pp are lucky that they can't understand not being able to answer the phone.

Unsure what country yiu reside in, but in the UK we have a mental health crisis line via 111. You can definitely request that.

Or call up on the day for an emergency appointment - not guaranteed, but worth a try. Most doctors surgeries in the UK has to keep some time aside for emergency appointments.

Hope this helps and you get the help you need

Do you have e consult ? It is really helpful if you do

OP Why don’t you ring 111. If you explain how ill you are feeling they can arrange for a doctor to ring you. Not your own I know. After a telephone consultation I was offered a face to face appt again not with my GP but it might just help you in the meantime. Alternatively you could ring the surgery and ask to speak to the practice manager and explain what’s happened. They might be able to get you an earlier appointment
Good Luck

Agree with the call 111 posters. My concern is that even if the Dr had phoned at the expected time, would you have answered the unknown number?

Sorry to hear you’re struggling op. Sorry you’ve had some harsh replies. Sending love

https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/mental-health-services/where-to-get-urgent-help-for-mental-health/

xxx

I've written down the wrong date for an appointment more than once. Either I've read/heard it wrong, or written it down wrong. Sometimes I've written down what I expect, rather than what it is. When I've gone back and read the original message, it's always been me wrong.
It happens. Apologise and move on.