too fussy about my blind date's shoes???

[VinegarTits]

Went on a blind date on Friday night, nice looking guy, tall (6 ft 6) and handsome in a rough looking way, we got on very well and he liked me a lot, in fact he told me yesterday in a phone conversation, that when he saw me come across the pub car park he was blown away! but i didnt like his shoes and its really putting me off him....

In my effort to not let this affect my perception of him, i agreed to go out with him again yesterday for lunch, in hope he would be wearing better shoes.....

His shoes were not as bad this time, but not great either, and i didnt like his t-shirt...wtf is wrong with me, i know IABU, why am i being so fussy when i cant afford to at my age!

Can i take him shopping for new shoes??

NO no no no no. NO! You are being TOTALLY unreasonable!

Right. I was 18 when I met my dp. Did I care about his shoes? Did I wonder if our politics were compatible? Did I decline a second date because he read the torygraph? Noooooo! Of course I didn't. I was 18 and still young and foolish enough to fall head over heels desparately in love with him because he was so dreamy . My time was well spent doodling my first name and his surname in my diary, not sounding him out as a compatible match for me.

If I met him now, there's no way I'd go on a second date. For gods sake the man reads the Torygraph! And doesn't like dogs. And favours stripy polo shirts. And plays golf. But I'd be missing out on spending my life with the most perfect, kind, generous, wonderful man ever. He's my soul mate despite all the peripheral crap.

When I listen to all my single girlfriends talking about how it's impossible to find a decent man, but in the same breath dumping someone because he'd never heard of couscous (actual example) it makes me very relieved that I met dp before I got rational enough to consider whether or not I liked him. I just loved him.

(Erm... Having said that, maybe if his shoes are enough to put you off it wasn't meant to be.)

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

I do know i am BU to a degree, and i have wondered whether my fussiness has hindered me in the past...but i have to agree with tmmj on most of what she has said, even when i was 18 i was fussy, i once dumped a guy because he didnt iron his t-shirt on our second date.....

I've only read the OP.
My friend has a thing about shoes. She once sent me a letter in the days before email saying she had got a new job and she fancied one of the men in her office but she couldn't stand his shoes.

They have been married for nearly 10 years.

Thank you Doodle!

I can't visualise cornish pasty shoes no matter how hard I try, and am therefore finding it hard to Judge. Can someone link to a picture?

Smelly car is dodgy though.

IMO forget the shoes. but grubby hanky.
What were his hands like. Long fingernails? or worse dirty nails?

Broccoli you have made me realise all the annoying things that i missed in dh at start due to being 'in love'...yep its blind!

No his shoes were more like this and unpolished

And he had black trousers with silver zips on the pockets, they looked like kids school pants

Message withdrawn

Oh those are pretty horrific. Just marginally better than smelly trainers I suppose.

TMMJ's were fine, I was feeling very concerned as they are almost my preferred choice of footwear in a blind date (given all the other possiblities!)

What are your though on good chains? he wears a gold chain (frank butcher like thing) that put me off too, things is, i do quite fancy him, he is good looking, just a very bad dresser...

I went right off my ex when he started wearing cowboy boots

You CAN change things - I took a hand in dh's (then dp's) shoe choice - would go in a shoe shop and pick out something that looked good but comfortable (dh's main criteria!) and he would then spend then next 40 mins trying other shoes on only to come back to the pair that I pointed out to start with. Got him out of cornish pasties and trainers into much more acceptable footwear! Took 5 yrs longer to do anything about the hair cut, but have even suceeded there. Also changed his coats (in particular), jumpers, shirts, shorts, etc etc etc. All by degrees. 10th aniversary coming up

So, no, shoes aren't the most important thing, but if they are standing out about him, perhaps there is not enough attraction for you to want to take him on as a project?

Message withdrawn