To ask how long can you all keep it tight before you need a blow out?

[Coatsoff42]

Only because after a whole Sumer of keeping it tight and responsible and the return to school stuff I am ready to drop the plough and cut loose. It feels like long enough.

An I unreasonable to say there is a limit on how long you can be good and work hard before you go mad?

what I struggle with is how all time - whether working time or supposedly down time - is shot through with little niggly requirements to be available to give someone a lift somewhere or collect them, or a meal time. It's like a dog being always on a lead and being yanked back if you think you can actually run into a field of time. No! No field! you just get this little margin to walk carefully in before you get snatched back onto a narrow path

Awesome!

In my home country, we celebrate carnival every year

it is 3 days of dressing up unrecognisably, getting drunk, dancing in the street and literally snogging anyone and everyone. All the normally behaved and quiet people take part, you can behave and there is no consequences for those days

so maybe book a trip to a as catholic carnival-celebrating country. You do not need to go that far, go to Maastricht in the Netherlands(!) for carnival and just let loose

Brits do a similar thing when they go to Benidorm/mafaluf/ any stag or hen do in Europe

Sometimes I get the urge to book one of those rage rooms where you can break things and scream and all that kind of thing. Then I get the mortal fear that there are hidden cameras in them, and I’ll go viral or something.

I think I get you, OP! Maybe this is why some older people get to an age and just start saying whatever the hell they like, they’ve held it in too long 😆

I don't feel like drinking at the moment because I am not very well but although I don't fancy being drunk I do really fancy being incapacitated. Like whatever the eventual consequences of passing out drunk or on drugs it would be so great to just be unable to deal with whatever for say 8 or 12 hours. I mean obviously it would be awful, I can't imagine anything worse than putting my kids in the position of going 'Oh I guess no one is going to make our tea or take us to piano because mum is passed out drunk" but you know what I mean

My eldest DD is aged 13 and a real character - she loves to do loud singing/shouting and being great fun. Occasionally she will have dance around the kitchen, or shriek loudly in frustration at her teenage responsibilities 🤣

Sometimes, she'll be pretty mad and do various animal impressions. I think maybe as a mum letting off steam., I should join her, and gallop along pretending I'm a horse neighing in memory of my horse impressions of my childhood.

There.. I feel better already 🤣

Do you have any time for you? I catch up with friends a few times a month. Usually at their house or mine due to expense of going out but if here husband will go down garage or watch tv in our room so we get a good chat. Bottle of wine some sausage rolls crisps and a natter.

Without that I would absolutely die of the monotony of everyday life work and housework etc

Last time I felt like this my lovely DH suggested I take myself off for a couple of days. I went to London, mooched around all the museums I wanted to and drank way too much in cocktail bars.

Bloody wonderful and set me right for another couple of years.

Can you do something like that?

Oh this sounds like such a good night 😆

Also agree the poster above - exercise is helpful.

The grind is the grind, most people need an outlet. I always have a few nights out in my back pocket, I need it. Can’t leave it too long between nights out or there’s a risk that the built up pressure will lead to too much err…revelling and potentially some permanent damage to your real life self.

@Coatsoff42
I am so with you. I regularly have quite realistic fantasies about booking a one way ticket to Brazil. Who knows I might just do it one day

Same. And I'm in. I live for these times with friends and the OH. I'm 51. He's 57. We can still party if we want. Kids are grown now. We often have weekends away living the life. We are getting married in 5 weeks. We have just had 2 hen and stag nights. I should have died the amount of shots I had one weekend. And that was alongside my daughter😬. Not clever. Not pretty. But was massive fun at the time. When kids were younger we did organise girls nights out every couple of weeks. Toddler mums. All ready for this blow out that's talked about. Me and him stayed up till 5am one weird week away we decided to have in benidorm 🤣🤣🤣 happy days. I have also put the dogs in the car at stupid times and just walked along the beach. Different kind of blow out. Felt just as good to release the toxins
Do ittttttttt

You need to do more fun stuff regularly so you don't get like this lol, I go out with friends for drinks or dinner and the occasional spa day (not everyone's cup of tea but do the equivalent for you) that way I never get too crazy with work and kids. DH does the same

Well done for putting up with the mockery OP and you have a point. I’m over that grind now but spent years feeling tired and put upon combining work and small
kids. Eventually I got into the habit of going away for short breaks sometimes with one kid ( not exactly carefree but at least a change of scene). Now my kids are teens and I go away on my own several times a year.

Not really- I have plenty of friends but none that want to go crazy. I’m in my 40’s and other mums seem to say they are too tired, can’t be bothered, like a quiet night in and can’t be up too late etc. Sometimes it’s difficult to find like minded friends when you are older.
Lucky you if you have found some!

Since my mid forties I'm not happy with working and responsibility. I'd love to stop and do what I want rather than be busy for everyone else.

I do have a DH, he is very content in his life and does not feel any need to cut loose. And my friends seem happy enough with a couple of glasses of wine and a catch up.

But I feel like I want to go to a rave, or a carnival, or be a whirling dervish and get out of my head and stop worrying about being a good parent and nice person all the time.

Prime candidate for an ayahuasca retreat

Completely with you OP.
I often feel the same way- I have mice friends who love a catch up over dinner, wine, coffee, brunch etc but it just doesn’t always hit the spot.
No one seems to feel the same and most friends just claim they are tired or too old for all that or like an early night.
I think, looking deeper I miss the freedom and fun and hedonistic feeling of youth. When going crazy was normal, expected and we used to laugh and laugh, there were hardly any responsibilities

For starters, could you put on some of your favourite power music and dance around the room for a while!

I hear you OP!

I hate having to be sensible and patient and responsible and put others first all the time.

I go to gigs. Jump about. Lose myself in the loud.

A quarter of the population are on anti depressants- probably a higher number of mums.

We're sedated.

This is what 18-30s holidays are for?

I'm enjoying the image of you with your little mice friends.

I have a friend who does this. Books an air bnb for the weekend, goes with her partner and some friends, they take recereational drugs and drink and party on all weekend. She’s early 50s and Oxbridge educated. I’m not judging.