To think parents nowadays are just weak

[Alberta56]

Not sure is it just me but I feel like most parents are just soft and incapabble to discipline their own kids. I constantly see topics here and not only about small kids doing what they want - screaming, tantrums, wanting stuff and parents are just so helpless. When I go on the tube kids screaming putting their dirty feet on the seats. At home kids not wanting to eat and parents act like they own a restaurant immediately cooking something else. What's wrong with saying NO, or ""keep quiet" or " you eat whats available or "you go and play alone while mommy reads a book for 1 h". Why are parents constantly trying to keep kids entertained and spend a fortune on stupid activities. Worst thing is that I see young colleagues 18/ 19 years old coming to work and are just incapable of being a human - constantly late, all the time have to think about their feelings and emotions can't even complain to HR when they're not doing their job properly....I just don't get it really. I'm about to be a mom myself and if I need i will discipline my kid with firm approach non of that " let them express themselves" cr@p.

😂😂😂
Indeed!
I was, in all seriousness called a scallywag today by my 4 year old for firmly telling him to stop running before he got to a car park...
They are individuals, not processions OP!!!

Hmm I don't know OP. In principle I'd like to agree (mum of two) but I know it's all easier said than done.

Please have your child and then comment when they're older. I don't think you're in a position now.

And my rule was not to say anything to a child I didn't want to hear back 100000000 times a day. "NO" being one of those words.

I have great boundaries and DD is a delight.

Totally agree op

So your not even a parent yet?

My DC are teens and one close to being an adult, I didn't treat my children as my adversaries as I adore them and I was brought up like that, with kindness and fairly liberal parents, we have all turned out decent and hardworking, maybe you want to believe this is true and I don't know, believe what you read in the papers but just saying, 'no' frequently is not good parenting!

Some phases have fallen into disuse and should be resurrected. My dad remembers his mother (who was lovely and a brilliant mum) saying ”get out from under my feet” ie sod off and play. Can’t see any modern parent saying similar!

Good luck with your book reading while your kid pours all your lovely bubble bath down the loo and tries to drown the hamster 😆

It’s good that you’ve decided that you’re going to be firm with discipline.

Do come back in a few years to report how you’re getting on with this

"I'm bored"

"Go and play in the traffic"

I don't recommend my parents' parenting.

I voted yanbu because I've experienced gen z graduates and they are so wet compared to my generation who graduated in the financial crisis, we all knew we had to work really hard to keep our jobs back then. However you are being unreasonable for your judgemental attitude of parents when you don't have children. It's really hard. Discipline is like balancing on a tightrope trying to do it right. I mean good lord, if only they would just be quiet because you told them too! You can never please everybody as a parent, people hate children looking at screens but they also hate children playing and making noise. I've even seen people slagging parents off on here for what they described as 'performative parenting' which from their description just sounded like talking to their children about what they were doing. I mean you just can't win!

I painted a mug once, to drink that tea in. Cheered me right up.

I genuinely cannot believe that in 2024 people wish they could just hit their kids and tell them to go away. It’s not 1965, we do not need to get slippers out so kids eat their tea.

Hahahaha, this is an hilarious and pithy joke, no? It’s a stonker! If not, then truly, I can’t wait until you have a toddler or two playing merry hell with your mental and physical wellbeing.

Parenting can be so wonderful and fulfilling and then 10 seconds later, take you further to the depths of frustration and despair than you ever thought possible.

Couple that with sleep deprivation beyond even what the armed forces inflict on their recruits and hey, maybe even some exciting levels of new-found incontinence and then, you may judge. Except of course, you may not. Because everyone is doing the best they can. But rest assured, continuing with your opinions about how to do it better will not enamour you to your new-found circle of other new parents. Be kind and supportive to them, you have NO idea how much you will need them or how your life is about to be changed. Good luck and enjoy your new arrival.

Parenting hypothetical children is a bit different to being an actual parent... come back in a few years OP....

It doesn't hit a nerve with me. I had a particularly horrendous few years when my son was younger, to the point people were getting concerned about my own health. I persevered with parenting as I saw fit and he's now a teen and we have very few issues, he's like a completely different boy. No he's not masking as many on here would say, we just found strategies that worked for him, that helped him and he knows to come and ask for help to understand or process something or to say he needs time alone if he recognises an emotion coming on that is going to stress him out, plus we can see the signs of a potential meltdown and immediately know what to do to minimise the distress to him.

So my experience may not be the same as others, but it's a sweeping generalisation to say all SEND parents would be offended and can't find strategies and ways to minimise behaviour issues after many years of trial and error.

It caused a lot of trauma, poor mental health and poor self esteem.

I love posts like this. Older generation Greatest Hits coming to you straight from the days of Rose Tinted Glasses. Look out for such classics as

’We didn’t have mental health/neurodiversity in our day!’

’Yes my cousin was in an institution from childhood but his mother was delicate/hysterical’

’A bit of smack didn’t do me any harm, we had resilience. No I don’t think I’m now so emotionally cold I can’t recognise other people’s circumstances as individuals, it’s only about how I dealt with things and I certainly never felt deep sadness and lack of love and well treatment. Resilience means never needing therapy for everything I evidently lacked in my childhood and blaming the future generations for giving their children what I needed’.

And of course

’Why do my now grown children keep me at arms length and what the hell is a ‘boundary’’.

You seem to be forgetting that your unborn baby is actually a real person. They’ll respond or not respond in ways you can’t even imagine. There will be battles you will choose not to fight because other battles are bigger.

Everyone is a perfect parent before they become one. Guarantee you will regret this post when you understand more - just as much as every other parent before you regrets some of their own certainties.

This.

It caused a lot of trauma, poor mental health and poor self esteem

More kids suffer now than they did then.

Come back to us in a few years when you’ve attempted your way of parenting and little Hugo is trying to use the bus seats as a trampoline and currently refusing to eat unless it’s orange cheese strings or cucumber cut into circles (not rectangles). “I did my best” we’ll hear you cry, whilst you’re made to feel shit by some woman on Mumsnet criticising people’s parenting when she hasn’t even got kids…

But that’s sort of my point - some people are still in those years of trial and error, which I’m sure (hopeful) you recognise.

Personally we’re at the point where we sleep once a week, pick actual human waste off the floor and navigate lots of meltdowns, often in very public places.

I’m by no means speaking for everyone here, but on “those days,” parenting judgment isn’t needed or welcome.

Exactly 😅

100 % agree everything is pathetic these days.

I was the best parent you could ever have imagined. And then I actually had children.

Please do save this post @Alberta56

Revisit it in a few years.

Actually no, a couple of months, post partum? That should do it.

Little Hugo on a bus??????????????

Don't take the piss😂