Is it rude to ignore a wedding dress code?

[PuzzleMix]

Posting for traffic.

Haven't been to a wedding for about 10 years so haven't encountered this trend before.

Invite says guests are encouraged to wear autumnal colours- reds, greens, browns or yellows. I don't have anything in these colours, and money is tight at the moment. I do have a wedding appropriate outfit but it is navy with bright flowers.

Would it be unreasonable to just wear this?

This isn't a particulary close friend's wedding but l don't know how to play this! l don't want to stand out as not joining in, but surely not everyone follows these dress codes? Or do they!?

They're not cheap

I bought them 10 years ago...am shocked that they all seem to be over £200 now!

Just wear what you’ve got and don’t feel bad about it.

As a pp said, attending a wedding can often be quite expensive enough anyway.

Have been to an event recently where the dress code was one colour. Awful to be told what to wear I know, had to sick it up and go along with it. Got a couple of dresses from vinted, wore one of them. No need to splash out, charity shop, borrow etc. X

It strikes me that if people feel oblged to stick to a certain colour palette the guests will not necessarily be dressed in wedding finery, but in anything they can find to comply with the dress code. So the guests wearing charity shop buys in colours that don't suit them might not look as great in the photos as the bride might like.

That actually sounds like the same relatives I mentioned upthread with the white and gold for the 50th birthday party. When they first announced they were getting married, I was initially told it was going to be a small ceremony, registry office, no bridesmaids. It was Mum who told me that and I think Grandad said it to her, so it was possible something got lost in translation along the way somewhere, but I went looking for something to wear thinking it didn't matter about any colour scheme (I will say here that my uncle and aunt knew I was shopping for outfits, and at no time did they either mention a colour scheme, or suggest that I wait until they'd made a decision on it.)

Until I bought a blue dress. The next week, these relatives landed it on me that actually, they expected me and my cousin to be bridesmaids and buy something that matched with the brick red ribbon on the cake (when I actually saw the ribbon a few weeks later, it was more like rose pink). So I then also had to pay for a second dress. Never mind that I was on a student loan at the time...

So I’ve seen a lot of this is for social media and now a days brides , I would just like to say my aunt and uncle got married 30 years ago she banned anyone from wearing any shade of green or purple , she banned hats and any flower or fruit patterns and she was mental about it , so much my nan wore a purple dress with a massive hat with fake fruit and flowers on it 🙈 it’s not a now a days thing I promise you people have always been this crazy .

I think you'll be fine. If it's for their photo "aesthetic" then I'm more than happy not to be photographed!! In fact the last wedding I went to didn't have any of the "traditional" group pictures anyway.

You could probably get a cheap dress on vinted in one of those colours. I don’t like the idea of demanding a dress code but equally wouldn’t want to stand out by not partaking.

Having said that, I can’t see many men buying a green or brown suit.

I would inclined to turn it down if not a close friend. I couldnt afford to splash out on something I wouldnt wear again on top of everything else a wedding costs

Having looked at your photo, yes, I think that dress is perfectly fine! Draw out one of the more autumnal colours with an bag or scarf if you wish but my no means essential

I've never found dress in a charity shop that fits as I'm top heavy. I always have to buy dresses new and often try on loads to get the one that fits. I think the dress is lovely and the reds and greens are autumnal anyway.

Woah people.

this is super common - even those without instagram.

they are requesting Color’s, not requiring you to buy a bridesmaid dress!

if the flowers on the navy are seasonally appropriate awesome, if not no bigs, or borrow from a friend or get the scarf people keep suggesting. maybe have some fun with it rather than freaking out.

Nobody's freaking out. Some of us are just annoyed at the rudeness of being told to wear certain colours. And cringing at the tackiness of it.

Fuck em. I think your dress sounds fine.

I went to a wedding with a suggested dress code for the first time this year. I'd already sorted my dress which was absolutely not in keeping with the code at all and was a bit torn about whether to wear it. I mentioned it to the bride in the run up and she was very clear that I should wear whatever I wanted, it wasn't a problem. On the day there was a real range- some people had followed the code but I'd say most hadn't. It was a very informal wedding and not exactly typical in style. But I think navy with flowers sounds almost autumnal anyway. I'd definitely wear it and not worry!

Do you actually want to go? Sorry if I've missed this. I find weddings are only bearable for people I really care about. An ex colleague and their partner I'd met once would not make that cut. And dictating clothes sends a strong signal that they have no clue about hosting an event or interest in their guests beyond using them as props for photos. So a doubly hard no.

No, I’d just wear what you’re comfortable wearing. 🙂

It will be for picture purposes, if your an all day guest I think you should be following code, try to borrow something suitable if can't afford one, or try vinted.

Why should you have to buy something at all just to fit in with someone's silly idea of having the guests look themed for photos? Not only will it look tacky and shit anyway it's really sad to be centering the aesthetic over your guests' comfort and enjoyment.

Why are you attacking me, I gave my opinion, I didn't give people a code at my wedding, they wore what they wanted to. But if I was asked to wear a particular colour to someone elses I would try my best to fit in, whether you think it looks shit is up to you, some one I used to work with had everyone in blue, I assume she requested this and actually her pics were lovely with everyone matching but think it only works for a smaller more intimate wedding in my opinion

Who's attacking you? I'm just giving my opinion too which happens to disagree with yours. What's made you come back 4 days later to pick a fight now?

Little update - l went to the wedding this weekend and wore my navy outfit with red shoes, nails and lipstick. The red handbag l had ordered didn't arrive in time so l took a black one.

And guess what?! It was absolutely fine! Lots of guests were not wearing 'autumnal' colours, even the brides father. It didn't seem to affect the bride's enjoyment of her day!

A lot of worrying about nothing. And no men arrived in yellow or orange suits 😂

My elderly MIL had to spend £300 on getting her dress made for a relative's wedding. The bride supplied the fabric.
This is on top of the really expensive destination wedding she is going to.
We're not going to the wedding thank goodness.

Maybe find a dress on vinted for £5. Although yes a dress code is silly.