To not be happy with new teacher so far because of this

[Chilli89]

1. I messaged her about something and she said she would sort it a few days ago and that someone would be in touch the next day and I’ve heard nothing
2. We were told reading books had come home and I messaged the same day saying my D son hadn’t got his and they still haven’t supplied one for him
3. they were in the line at drop off. he wanted help so approached her. She shouted at me ‘don’t shout at me, I won’t talk at you if you shout at me’ in a really angry face. She didn’t know I was stood there, he did not shout, I heard the whole thing

aibu to not be happy so far?

my d son has only just turned 5. In Y1

This is a five year old child and a teacher who needs to quit if they can't manage their emotions as you suggest. Stepping out of a line only warrants shouting to warn of a hazard. Not because of poor emotional control.

I wish there were civility in school charters for teachers. So many awfully behaved teachers judging by all the threads the past two weeks.

If you see it, call it. Would you shout at an adult in the same situation? We’ve been dealing with a similar thing. Screaming at the class through the day (although very nice when parents are around) once happy child hating to go to school, very emotional and lots of sleep problems. I’m in Australia, so this is now 75% through the school year. Have spoken to the school due to repeat behaviour. The teacher struggles with 5yo class and the school has ended up placing additional resources in classroom to help the teacher - which has helped a lot.
I would actually step forward and clearly state ‘do not shout at my child. This is not acceptable. I have been standing here and he did not shout at you.’ I am generally supportive of teachers (and there have been times with older children where they were in the wrong and we had ‘discussions’ and remedial action). My mother used to say “if you don’t stand up for your kids, no-one else will.” I am supportive of working with teachers, but it’s a two way street.

100% agree with you - you wouldn’t accept being shouted at at work (or shouldn’t) so why would you think it was okay for a teacher (in a position of trust) to shout at a 5 year old little boy!

Not sure where you’d get politician from, you sure you’re not one??

If you read OP original message

Point 1 in the OP - “I messaged her about something”

Point 2 in the OP - “we were told reading books had come home and I messaged the same day”

Now I’m not a politician as you for some reason think but I am able to add up and that would be 2 messages not one as you suggest 🤔

What from the one sided narrative from a parent suggests the teacher has an issue with this specific child? That she raised her voice slightly in front of several children at pick up but OP is adamant it was at her child because he was stood the nearest??

I’m sure OP will be complaining to the school about it after some of the responses on here so I’m sure your point 5 won’t be correct for long now will it?

You haven't done anything wrong OP, on Mumsnet teachers can do no wrong and posters will tie themselves in knots to justify a teacher shouting at a 5 year old.

I would approach the head. Year one is difficult enough for children without having to deal with a bully for a teacher.

You are being too overbearing. Do you message the teacher directly or through the office. Most schools don't allow parents to message teachers directly to avoid parents being rude to teachers and continually messaging them. If the messages go through the school office, the HT or secretary can deal with the messages and only pass the ones onto the teacher that the teacher needs to respond to.

How is a chat after school to make sure he had been ok after being emotional about school and one message about a missing book (only intended so she was aware and wasn't expecting a reply, but did expect the book to turn up) being overbearing? The school use an app to show pictures of what theyve been getting up to during the school day and to put updates on and they welcome messaging, the teacher encouraged it in her post on the app, if anyone had any questions.

You should of put her in her place then and there when she shouted at your child in front of you / the class for no reason @Chilli89 don't let him be hurt by her when he's already feeling nervous m. He's 5 for god sake what's wrong with this woman.

Point 1 I find troublesome - it's basically saying "your child is so insignificant, don't expect her to care".

As for point 3, my youngest has just started year 1 and she turned 5 over the summer hols. She's so young still. I hope she knows to stand still in line but if she didn't, then I have no doubt her teacher would be firm but kind in her approach. We're lucky there are only 10 in her class and so it's really only 5 to control - so I know it's different, but the teacher's personality is such that she has patience and the kids seem to respect her approach.

Good wiggle attempt

Agreed. My son's teacher shouted at him and he was so upset. I went in to chat to her and she said "yes I shouted at him and I'd do it again". I took him out immediately and now home educate him. I won't allow anyone to abuse my child. I'm shocked at the people on this thread existing verbal abuse of a small child. Children need to be and to feel safe at school. They are vulnerable and teachers are in a position of power and responsibility.

OP I would book a chat with her and express your concerns. Then I would follow up with an email to the head so they are aware.

If the teacher is this stressed at the start of the year she needs support and possibly some extra training.

Too overbearing?
OP simply requires the book that her DS is supposed to have.

You think that's overbearing?
Wow...

You could always home school him if you hate the teacher that much

Where does it say OP hates the teacher?

So many posters thinking there’s justification for a teacher losing her rag at a 5yo.

The kids need to keep in line so that she can make sure each one is sent to the correct t adult.It is an important safeguarding measure.what may i ask you would be the result if all the children stepped out of line? That is why she needs to be firm, it is for your own child's safety!
He is 5, not a toddler.He should know how to follow instructions by now.

I remember my daughter training to be a TA saying that the teacher she was with had said about a little boy who was 4/5 that she couldn't bear him, he was so clingy and whiny.
Some teachers can take a dislike to certain kids. it's bloody awful to think that your child could be the one they dislike.

I would definitely have a word, don't let her think she's allowed to shout like that at your child.
he has to go through school with her every day.

And she's an adult and should know by now not to shout at a 5 year old.

A teacher shouting at a child clearly isn't acceptable. However, neither is calling for the teacher to resign. (aware it's not you doing this, op). The teacher is human.

Instead of complaining into the mumsnet abyss, why not explain to your child its important to do what the teacher asks, and then speak to your teacher? Ask if there is something you can do to help her. Maybe she is overwhelmed, and perhaps support from the parents is what she needs.

Sometimes we need to take a different approach and help, rather than complain.

I really don't think supporting abusive actions is the right thing to do.

Petitchat. That's really not what I said. Sad old world if we can't recognise someone may need help.

Yeah. The teacher may just be a dick, bit isn't it best to at least see if there's something you can do to help first, before writing them off completely. After all, this is the person who is looking after your kid for a year.

If your dd doesn't like it, tell him to do as he's told!

I wouldn’t be pleased if that happened. I’d talk to her after school today if no book is in his bag. She doesn’t sound very nurturing. My child’s teacher is always there if you need to mention something like that.

Ypi can help by telling your child to do as he is told.

Totally disagree.
The child needs help and support.
The teacher can gain it elsewhere if she needs it.

The most important person is the child.