To not be happy with new teacher so far because of this

[Chilli89]

1. I messaged her about something and she said she would sort it a few days ago and that someone would be in touch the next day and I’ve heard nothing
2. We were told reading books had come home and I messaged the same day saying my D son hadn’t got his and they still haven’t supplied one for him
3. they were in the line at drop off. he wanted help so approached her. She shouted at me ‘don’t shout at me, I won’t talk at you if you shout at me’ in a really angry face. She didn’t know I was stood there, he did not shout, I heard the whole thing

aibu to not be happy so far?

my d son has only just turned 5. In Y1

OP said she was looking really angrily at her DS.Her latest post says the teacher was looking frustrated, perhaps caused by having to dismiss a line of children while apparently being hemmed in by parents and carers. Maybe they should have stood back a bit and given her some space? Or perhaps her expression wasn't frustration/anger at all, but exhaustion and stress? If she leaves before Christmas, it will become clear.

OP - it sounds as though she is a bit out of her depth and under pressure to pretend everything is going swimmingly. You are going to be stuck with this teacher all year. Is another school an option?

Presumably some of the ones leaving the profession shouldn’t have been passed as competent in the first place if they are unable to cope with a bit of pressure?

Exactly. Also, parents having low expectations of behaviour from their own children. I would have told my dcs off for shouting at the teacher.

I couldn’t get worked up about 1 and 2.

3 would bother me

I have said a few times that he did not shout. He is apparently a quiet member of the class according to his reception end of year report. His new teacher said the same when I spoke to her the other day about him struggling regarding wanting to go to school

The teacher was not hemmed in by parents. Only y1s come out to this part of the playground. It wasn't overly busy.

It was more than a raised voice. In fact, the way she said it sounded frantic and really angry and stressed out. Especially throwing her hands in the air and waving her arms around

Ironically, as someone who was a year 1 TA for a long time, it's actually the failure to send books home that bothers me the most. You want to hit the ground running when you start a new school year. Perhaps the teacher is assessing the children's levels but tbh in a good school, she should already know their reading levels after communicating with the foundation class teacher.

Op you said she said 'don't shout at me' so she perceived it as shouting. Why is she wrong?

She did but that's why I didn't get the outburst at all. It was like she was letting her frustration of the day out of him when he was stood right in front of her. I was stood within range, I barely even heard what it was that he said to her, let alone any shouting coming from him. There was not much background noise, parents just stood waiting and that's it. Everyone heard her shout though and were looking, some looked a bit surprised

Just treat it as a one off.

You slightly sound like you might be expecting more time/attention than is possible from a teacher of 30 kids. If the teacher spent 10 minutes of her attention on each child (or their parent), it would take the whole school day.

The hardest thing to get used to at the start of the new term is how little meaningful contact you get, especially at first. The teacher can barely remember which kid is yours or whether he can read or not. She can't answer questions quickly because she doesn't know the kids yet.

You are making lots of assumptions that she's weirdly taking out anger on your kid. Its unusual behaviour for a teacher, so its actually more likely there's something totally separate going on you know nothing about.

Maybe she's got an important meeting with the head & parents are holding her up. Maybe she's trying to get out of school on time to collect her own DC.

Maybe your kid just needed to wait, she'd have got to him eventually.

We had a very similar scenario - again at the start of year 1. I'm definitely not someone who emails in much so I left it a while, but then I asked a couple of times for books and it was just hit and miss - we rarely got reading books. I then flagged that my DD was getting anxious and the teacher said she was fine. Then she started making herself sick with anxiety and waa being sent home. This went on for 6 months and I tried a few times but the teacher didn't reply to a single email. So we moved her to another school. Perhaps I should have been more vocal but I have friends who are teachers and I didn't want to be that parent. I'm actually just pleased we left that school as 3 years on and everything has been fine ever since. Sometimes it is just the teacher / school.

The school I teach at currently has a 48 hour allowance for replying to parent emails (not including weekends). Clearly emails can only be responded to when the children are not in class.

He wasn't shouting....

What on earth has this got to do with this thread?

So OP should just accept her DS being shouted at?
Is that what you're advising?

I can't see any scenario where a teacher would need to shout especially angrily and especially at a 5 year old unless they were in immediate risk of danger. I would follow that up.

Good prison teachers control their classes of grown men who are criminals without shouting. If she's that stressed and frazzled after a day with young children and can't control her temper, she's in the wrong job.

The messaging is a separate unrelated non issue.

OP, I’d just give up and move your kid to another school already. You obviously have an issue with the teacher, it’s going to be a very long year for you both if you keep this up. Your child has been back at school for approx 1 week and already you’ve messaged twice with issues, had a meeting with her and now have some issue in the playground to complain about.

I sent one polite message about the book, as advised to do so if any questions by the teacher herself, on the post she put on. I wasn't even expecting a reply, just thought that the book might then come home with my son if she was made aware, I have sent no more messages at all.

It wasn't a meeting. I just quickly went to speak to her at the end of the school day in the playground, when all the other children were dismissed. I just asked if he had been ok during the school day, as he was getting a bit emotional at home regarding school. That was all

I can’t believe you genuinely think point 3 is acceptable?!?!?!

Given the amount leaving, I don't think it's incompetence, but more the unreasonable and unsustainable pressure put on teachers. There aren't many people who can put up with that sort of pressure, which is why we have a retention crisis.

I find parents suffocating at the moment. We can't do anything right, and their children can do no wrong.

Yeah…well… shouting in an infant class is not acceptable though. If she can’t keep her cool with a 5 year old, she’s in the wrong job. We have teachers that are known for being “shouty” in our school but they tend to work with older children. A 5 year old will not thrive in such environment.

Good bit of twisting the facts.
Are you a politician?

Let's correct the facts:

1. It's the teacher who had an issue with a 5 year old.
2. It was the teacher who invited messages.
3. It was one message, not two.
4. There was no meeting.
5. OP has not complained about the playground, she's asking for opinions about a teacher shouting.

Good attempt though. Sure you're not a politician??