To just be so, so fed up of where I live:(

[GenuineRocks]

It wasn't so bad previously but really changed over the past 6 years or so. I grew up on a farm in on the edge of town and it felt like such a different world. Moved away after uni and only came back to assist when our parents were ill, and managed to get stuck here after.

It feels awful to see what was once a decent place go so much downhill. I don't even recognise the people, it is like another world, just so angry and loud and quite violent. What was once my closest town centre has become a drug infested hell hole, and the crime rate is climbing rapidly.

But what is most depressing is the vibe, everywhere outdoors is miserable, and I am not exaggerating. Constant sirens (only in the past few yrs) and police. Extremely loud, aggressive sounding vehicles, shouting and screaming in public, litter and shit everywhere.

I used to blame government for this kind of thing, policy, etc. But I don't know now. I see a growing culture of entitlement and selfishness all around. Maybe it's just this place? Of course the town centre died, like many have, but the trouble and violence that is visible is quite new here. It isn't all poverty, in fact it is a high rent area, and yet people really don't care.

I feel so depressed about this, yet know it is pointless. Life goes on and it isn't worth worrying about. Live and let live. But until we move, it has affected me to some extent, and even our own street has changed in the past few yrs.
It's like an alien place, that I don't recognise.
I long to be out of it, but reading some other posts I see this is common in many places.

I suppose it just got too much this past month, we have a new business opened in the street that revs all day, and how someone thought this was ok to go ahead I have no idea. Most of the original neighbours moved, and there is so much pet neglect , dog shit and litter here it feels hopeless.

Just fed up.

I agree OP. And everyone will blame their pet hate for it. (Benefits, tech, the old government, the new government, immigration, media, social networking, capitalism, amazon, older people, young people, covid..) In reality it's probably a bit of everything.
And society has "always been going downhill" since the Ancient Greeks - and it usually recovers again. But it DOES go downhill... and there have been periods of history which have been terrible - and periods which have been better. I have a feeling this is a downturn. But I may just be a pessimist.
In your situation I'd move if I could.

Wow.
I’ve come across far more examples of ‘“entitledness” from wealthy people not on benefits.

I’m fed up of the amount of dog poo everywhere it’s got worse and worse over the last 3-4 years it’s absolutely foul. In summer the parks all stink from warmed up shit it’s just absolutely horrible

I don’t hate dogs and don’t want to sound horrid, but every time I go back to the UK I can’t help feeling relief that dogs only live about 10 years, which means that if we’re lucky, the post-pandemic tidal wave of dogs will hopefully start to recede a few years from now. I would like to see more beaches and parks banning non guide dog dogs altogether - to abate the nuisance for now, but also to make dog ownership more inconvenient and less attractive so that hopefully fewer people will replace their dogs when the time comes.

Yes I feel the same I think the people who get them In 2020/21 aren’t your typical
dog owner and that’s why they aren’t picking up after them etc. so hopefully when they all start to decline they won’t feel the need to get another and things may revert back a bit. Typical dog owners tend to be more dog centred with their activities eg long walks etc these Covid owners just want a dog that fits in with them so the poor things are being dragged round shops and sitting under tables in cafes looking miserable

I agree. I travel a lot and notice quite a few European towns and cities experiencing similar things and people with the same complaints.

I saw a man ‘walking’ his dog yesterday, on a very busy road mind you. The dog was off lead and walking several feet behind the man. The dog could stop to have a quick poo and he’d never know. Not to mention it’s illegal for the obvious reasons.

If you hate where you live and rents are high, then fantastic - you can move! I've lived in multiple places over the years and have seen places going up as well as down. For example and based only on a few visits, parts of Kent seem far worse than they ever were, while Sussex and Hampshire seem to have improved in recent years. It really is about the specific place you are in, so find somewhere else that suits you better.

I agree with you that lots of areas are run down, population growth, austerity, overdevelopment in some areas has had huge impacts on quality of life. It's also true that some more affluent areas are lovely and full off community spirt etc. This is nothing new, think about the slums of our old industrial cities during the industrial revolution, think of the deprivation in areas where we saw closure of heavy industries, also look at the north south divide.

The issue for you is that your area has changed and declined and you are unable to leave at the moment, this is really getting you down and you do actually sound very despondent and depressed. How much is this impacting your daily life? Have you considered chatting to the gp about depression?

You are assigning the causes of this to post covid zeitgeist?

But, it sounds, from your description, like the composition of your area has changed too drasti cally for this to be an explanation.

An area of a town can just deteriorate for no clear reason. I suppose your options are, either go down the activism route and try to change things, or move (if possible)?

mmm, I'm not sure about the network thing. A work network, a school gate network but away from that?

Dog shit has got a lot worse. I think more people owning dogs inevitably means more bad owners.

I’ve noticed more people who seem to be quite selfish and entitled since covid. I’ve seen more people treating shop staff horribly, not just complaining but being incredibly rude and aggressive. Mostly it’s just little things I’ve noticed though, like people not using headphones on public transport (when did this become normal?), walking four abreast down a pavement and not moving out the way for someone else, not giving up seats to older people on the bus (I get not all disabilities are visible, but I live in a very student heavy area and I find it unlikely that all 10 of the young people sat in the priority seats at front of the bus have an invisible disability).

Don’t know whether it’s backlash against being cooped up during lockdown, once people got back to normal life they felt entitled to do whatever they wanted regardless of how it affects others, or whether people just forgot some of their social etiquette in those few months we were locked inside…or maybe it’s always been like that and months of me being inside more, meant that I just noticed it more once I got back to normal.

@Lwrenn spot on.
I remember growing up that people around me showed basic courtesy to me, smiling, holding doors, basic minimum stuff.
I try to pay this forward now I'm the older generation but everyone is avoiding eye contact so it doesn't work often. But how else do you make the world seem like a friendly welcoming place to be if all those incidental moments in passing are missing.

@Wordsmithery I agree the lack of investment in town centres has had a huge impact on the local communities. Councils have been very short sighted in not supporting businesses with rates that are too high, parking costs too high and not enough investment in public transport. The rise of out of town shopping centres and online shopping has contributed to the problem although the out of town centres are struggling now as well. Local businesses and shopping in actual shops needs to be encouraged as much as possible. People being sociable again and taking a pride in their local area can make such a difference.

County lines have severely impacted some of the smaller towns.

“You used to blame the government “ you said, but now you think people are careless. Did you blame the government when the Conservatives were in power but now that labour are in power people are just careless?

Just kidding. No I don’t recognise this. I live in a lovely area. I suppose what you describe is closely correlated with poverty.

Are you in the UK? It really sounds awful.

You sound surprised that the OP could be in the UK - even if it's not your 3-centred life you must realise it's a common problem in many areas.

Yes I don’t think people are taught to think of others any more. I am not advocating the return of religious classes but I don’t think that whatever has replaced them, has taught dc to think of others enough. There’s too much focus on the self nowadays. (I know that makes me sound like a reactionary old harrridan.)

Also, in my parents generation, there usually was a grumpy old man or woman on every street who wouldn’t care about speaking up and telling young lads to behave on the bus, or pick up the litter that they’ve dropped. Nowadays people are too scared to do that in case it incites a knife attack or they are filmed and posted all over social media and called a “Karen” or the male equivalent.

You’re absolutely right OP. The UK has changed so much over the last few decades. Some of the things have been for the better, but mostly we are now a self entitled inconsiderate lot, who treat our environment, and those around us, with indifference. We have a generation of people coming through who want everything given to them with the minimum of effort. A lot don’t want to work. A lot of them are a result of lazy ineffective parenting. The police are ineffective and are trained in ‘gentle’ policing, where a lot of time their hands are tied. I followed behind someone yesterday with her primary aged children, where they were unwrapping sweets and just chucking wrappers on the floor. Must admit this is a pet hate of mine - littering. I tapped her on her shoulder and pointed out that her children had ‘dropped’ some wrappers - just got a blank stare, and she continued walking on. If only the police could jump on anti social behaviour in the same way as the recent rioting was dealt with.

I guess you’re quite young then? Dog owners, once upon a time, didn’t even need to pick up the poo, and their dogs were allowed to just wander around minus leash or owner. Trust me, the problem with the dog poo was a hell of a lot worse then than it is now.

Why do you think it is a school's responsibility to teach children how to think of others? Isn't this the parent's role. For what it's worth I teach in a faith school and we do have RE classes twice a week and the school ethos is very much about respecting others. But unless parents do this too it's an uphill battle. A child's first teacher is their parent.

I disagree, Its absolutely unbelievable round here. Mounds of the stuff, near a school.

You are right op and you can see it on this site a lot and others. People have become more entitled and rude.

Currently experiencing similar just in my street! A gang of drug dealers seems to occupy the carpark 3 doors away. The neighbours and I have contacted the police multiple times, plus the people responsible for the carpark and the mayor. Promises have been made but zero action, zero police presence (which I understand, there are sometimes 6 officers for a population of over 100 000.) Utterly depressing.