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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder (thinking about this awful French rape case) if humans are just rotten

1000 replies

OptimismvsRealism · 05/09/2024 15:04

It wasn't just the husband - at least 80 men went along with this. Guys with ordinary lives drawn out of nowhere.

I wonder if it would be better if we were to just wind things up as a species.

OP posts:
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9
Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:30

Lostboys16 · 05/09/2024 23:28

Gemma Barker.

Convicted of sexual assault, not rape

Lostboys16 · 05/09/2024 23:32

Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:30

Convicted of sexual assault, not rape

If you want to go by the letter of the law, yes. What she did was just as vile as what a man can do with a penis.

GargoylesofBeelzebub · 05/09/2024 23:33

I didn't say women went to war raping men. I said woman have raped.

NO. NO THEY HAVE NOT. The man raped.

Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:33

Lostboys16 · 05/09/2024 23:32

If you want to go by the letter of the law, yes. What she did was just as vile as what a man can do with a penis.

She wasn’t convicted of rape though - you said she was

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:33

AngelicKaty · 05/09/2024 22:54

And yet I've just found this on the yougov website:

No, women cannot be charged with rape in the UK because the legal definition of rape requires penile penetration. However, women can be charged with other sexual offenses, such as:
Sexual coercion: Causing someone to engage in sexual activity without their consent
Sexual assault: Intentionally touching someone sexually without their consent
The UK government has no plans to change the legal definition of rape. However, the law does take sexual violence against men seriously, and forcing a man to have penetrative sex carries the same maximum sentence as rape.

So how could your client plead guilty to rape when, in the UK, she could never have been charged with it?

Oh right, you've read the yougov website. You are an expert.
I was on the defence team of a woman charged with rape in the 1990s. She pleaded guilty and went to prison.
Or perhaps I am just making it up for a laugh.
Read the rest of the thread to make up the rest of your law degree. Not answering any more questions about this.

Meditationgame · 05/09/2024 23:33

Lostboys16 · 05/09/2024 23:32

If you want to go by the letter of the law, yes. What she did was just as vile as what a man can do with a penis.

But the letter of the law is the definition of rape. That's not diminishing what she did but rape can only be completed with a penis.

Meditationgame · 05/09/2024 23:34

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:33

Oh right, you've read the yougov website. You are an expert.
I was on the defence team of a woman charged with rape in the 1990s. She pleaded guilty and went to prison.
Or perhaps I am just making it up for a laugh.
Read the rest of the thread to make up the rest of your law degree. Not answering any more questions about this.

https://www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/rape-and-sexual-offences-chapter-7-key-legislation-and-offences

So did you not adhere to the CPS guidance then?

Rape and Sexual Offences - Chapter 7: Key Legislation and Offences | The Crown Prosecution Service

https://www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/rape-and-sexual-offences-chapter-7-key-legislation-and-offences

Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:34

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:33

Oh right, you've read the yougov website. You are an expert.
I was on the defence team of a woman charged with rape in the 1990s. She pleaded guilty and went to prison.
Or perhaps I am just making it up for a laugh.
Read the rest of the thread to make up the rest of your law degree. Not answering any more questions about this.

Why would you be in the defence team for someone who has already pled guilty?

There’s only a handful of joint enterprise rape cases involving women and I can’t find any online where the woman pled guilty in the 1990s

You also said you’re a retired barrister but didn’t know the definition of rape lol

OneTwoTen · 05/09/2024 23:38

Oh, for goodness sake, I'm not making it up.
Here's another case from 2001. The law may have changed since then, I'm not up to date

If you can google an ancient Guardian article, then you should be able to google the Sexual
Offences Act, which you'll discover was updated in 2003 to define rape as the penetration of vagina, mouth or anus with a penis.

Toastandbutterand · 05/09/2024 23:39

Over40Overdating · 05/09/2024 23:11

@Pantaloons99 I honestly think none of us can know what goes through the heads of men, no matter how well we think we know them or how decent we think they are.

I would, before this, have hoped that most men, even if they were tempted to play over the side, would draw the line at raping an unconscious woman and be repulsed by it.

Yet they met on a website where the husband clearly laid out the terms. Congratulated the men who agreed to come to his house on liking rape too. There was no ambiguity.

And so many of them were up for it. And never broke the secret.

I can’t actually get my head round it.

They treated it like a card game or round of golf. An enjoyable diversion for an evening. Something new to try.

The lack of humanity is staggering.

How many men that we meet every day actually hate us and would do the same to any of us, given the opportunity.

Most men.

How many men do you think we're asked and didn't report it over those years? Because the police found this in another investigation. Not one single man reported it.

Not one.

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:40

Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:24

Okay, so some examples of women raping? That don’t include joint enterprise?

Oh you want examples but not including most of the examples? Catch yourself on. Rape by a woman in the UK is alway joint enterprise. Doesn't that count for you?

OneTwoTen · 05/09/2024 23:41

I was on the defence team of a woman charged with rape in the 1990s. She pleaded guilty and went to prison

How were you defending her if she'd pleaded guilty? There would have been no trial.

Meditationgame · 05/09/2024 23:41

OneTwoTen · 05/09/2024 23:38

Oh, for goodness sake, I'm not making it up.
Here's another case from 2001. The law may have changed since then, I'm not up to date

If you can google an ancient Guardian article, then you should be able to google the Sexual
Offences Act, which you'll discover was updated in 2003 to define rape as the penetration of vagina, mouth or anus with a penis.

She doesn't even need to Google I've shared the legislation twice on this thread.

GargoylesofBeelzebub · 05/09/2024 23:43

Oh you want examples but not including most of the examples? Catch yourself on. Rape by a woman in the UK is alway joint enterprise. Doesn't that count for you?

It's the MAN raping. FFS.

Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:43

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:40

Oh you want examples but not including most of the examples? Catch yourself on. Rape by a woman in the UK is alway joint enterprise. Doesn't that count for you?

But you said women raped when they went to war? Are you meaning that they rape by joint enterprise at war? What wars are you talking about??

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 05/09/2024 23:44

Meditationgame · 05/09/2024 23:29

Women can only be prosecuted as an accomplice, the can never, in this country, be prosecuted for the crime of rape. Rape can only be commited by a man.

The whataboutery attempts to deflect the horror of this by making "women do terrible things too" are despicable but that's not correct.

Woman guilty of rape NI
found guilty of towpath rape https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2001/mar/17/sarahhall?CMP=sharebtnurl Woman guilty of rape England

Here however it's 100% men. It's not the human race who are at fault. Gisèle Pélicot's bravery and dignity is astonishing.

YellowphantGrey · 05/09/2024 23:44

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:40

Oh you want examples but not including most of the examples? Catch yourself on. Rape by a woman in the UK is alway joint enterprise. Doesn't that count for you?

Because people on here are saying a woman can be found guilty of rape when she can't.

She can be found guilty of rape as joint enterprise but not as individual. People have said women go to war and rape.

Fact is, it seems anything will be used to excuse men and minimise their behaviour by insisting women are just as bad.

NonsuchCastle · 05/09/2024 23:44

Ereshkigalangcleg · 05/09/2024 23:27

Rape requires a penis to penetrate the victim in England (and I think also Scotland). A woman can only aid and abet a man to commit rape on either a female person or a male one, she cannot rape herself.

No, she can't rape as in insert her penis, but she can be guilty of rape as a matter of joint enterprise. Not just aiding and abetting but actually guilty of rape. Or she could up to at least 2001. As I've said, I am not up to date now.

Hybridz · 05/09/2024 23:45

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Garlictest · 05/09/2024 23:45

@AngelicKaty, because the case she defended was in the 1990s. Rape got a specific definition in 2003.

Ereshkigalangcleg · 05/09/2024 23:46

Oh you want examples but not including most of the examples?

You won't have any other examples as rape in this country is a man's crime, very occasionally with female accomplices. Women don't have a penis, so they cannot rape anyone themselves.

Hybridz · 05/09/2024 23:46

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Lizzie67384 · 05/09/2024 23:46

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Or their fathers? 🙄

GargoylesofBeelzebub · 05/09/2024 23:47

No, she can't rape as in insert her penis, but she can be guilty of rape as a matter of joint enterprise.

But the point is that no woman can be guilty of rape without a man being present. What are you not getting?!?

YellowphantGrey · 05/09/2024 23:47

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What have their Dads done to teach them?

At what point will men be held accountable rather than blaming women for everything and everyone?

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