AIBU for expecting my partner to leave our house to me in his will?

[newmama2023]

My partner and I are buying a house together and we need to write our wills. We've both been married before and have children with our ex spouses.

In the event of his death, my partner wants his share of the house to go to his children immediately, meaning I would have to sell the house. I was thinking that if i died first, he could stay in the house until he passed away.

Am I being unreasonable for being upset?

Yeah and who knows what the housing market is going to be like by then so its silly to suggest she can downsize, but overall, why would you sign up to anything that would put yourself at a disadvantage? The OP has to protect herself first, love is not enough.

So she is putting cash in up front but her isn't.

And he is stipulating that his half is sold immediately on his death.

She needs to get a properly drawn up agreement to protect what she puts in as capital up front, and to have a proper agreement about how they pay the mortgage etc and have a fair share of the house compared to their joint inputs to the household once bought. And that her half is protected for her to stay until she is ready to leave/dies herself, or at least have sufficient time to get properly organised, in case he should pre-decease her.

But with the 2 opening facts above, from your posts, my fear would be he doesn't give much to the household , that she will cover the majority of mortgage and living costs, but that his DCs will expect a full 50% on his death and demand the house is sold immediately to do that.

His responsibility is quite rightly his children above any other. If that causes an issue end the relationship.

If he leaves the lifetime benefit to the OP, with the children being the ultimate legatees his share of the property cannot be touched for OP's care home fees as she does not legally own his share.

I am the child in this scenario. DF bought a house (his money) for him and partner.

He changed his will when she raised similar concerns. I think its now set up as a lifetime interest trust between us.

She would be out of her mind to proceed with this and spectacularly foolish.

Op is paying more into the purchase than he is. It's supposed to be 'their' house, which for me should mean a home for life for either of them if they want it to be. Inheritance should only happen when both home owners have had what they need from the property, including care fees.
If they sign an agreement that forces sale of the house when he dies, we don't know that her half will even be enough for her to buy another property. She could end up, just for example, in her late 60's, no possibility of a mortgage, and unable to afford to buy even a small home.

Even if he sets something up in a will now that will prevent her losing the roof over her head if he dies - he can change that will.
Don't do it Op.

Look at it this way - it seems clear that if he didn't have Op's contribution to buying a house, he wouldn't be able to buy one. So he'd maybe rent for the rest of his life and his kids wouldn't inherit half the value of a house anyway. The purchase should be a partnership, not part of a plan to give his kids as much as possible if he pegs it.