Would you go nc with your parents for this

[giantcolouringbook]

I am 23(f) and work f/t my company have been offering compresses hours which I have happily accepted bearing in mind I get paid the same and do the same hours but an extra day off plus weekends.
I excitedly told my parents this and they are furious saying that I should have discussed it with them first as it affects them too.
They've also said if I'm going to be home an extra day of in the week I need to do something with it and not just hang around the house.
My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing.
Aibu to think a) this has nothing to do with them and b) I shouldn't be told to go out and do something when I am looking forward to an extra down day at home doing exactly what my dad does?
I am of course looking to move out asap but would you think there was any coming back from this or should I just move on never look back.

How can you go NC when you live in their house?!
Move out.
They don't want you there.
Get a room in a house. Lodger or HMO.

Of course it's not her house 🙄

But you dont know how much they earn and if they contribute to the rent and other house expenses. You made an assumption OP does not, but I have not seen any intel in her posts that she lives rent free. Maybe she pays a large share/rent. At any case, it's still her home and it's fine t oexpect to be able to stay there when she does not work.

Seriously?

You're massively overreacting and you sound quite spoiled. You're an adult in your 20s, it's time you looked at moving out.

Nothing you've said here sounds like anywhere near reason enough to cut your parents out of your life.

I mean, she can expect what she wants, I guess.

But I also bet her parents would expect their 23 year old with a full-time job to be moving out and becoming independent, not planning on hanging about their house three days a week doing nothing.

Gosh. This. I think it's time to move out. A lot of this depends on how much you are paying towards the running of the house though ? And how much of the housework/admin you are doing ? Unless it's loads it's a massive over reaction from you.

How do you propose to go no contact while living under your parents’ roof?

You are an adult with a fulltime job. Time to move out, not cut contact. Your relationship will improve when you do.

Does it matter how much they earn or contribute? Her parents clearly don’t want her to live with them anymore. She has created an extra day which will help her to earn more to move out. It might be her home currently but if her parents don’t want her around then they are obviously giving her some obvious hints that it’s time to go. And at 23 I would tend to agree!

You are over reacting.
They are opinionated but it is their home.

Consider working at a second job for some of the hours of your day off. Gardening or mowing lawns, ironing or cooking meals for an elderly person etc.

Save up for a deposit to move out and find your own house.

Is this tongue in cheek? If not you sound very dramatic and immature. Are your parents tired of this? No I would not go NC 😂 You need to move out (not in a huff), and live as an independent adult - their possible perception of you, as a dramatic, huffy, lazy arse, will then hopefully change and you will havw an improved relationship.

I think you’ll get a bit of a one sided reaction to this post because a lot of mumsnet seem to think it’s normal to want your kids to move out asap and love to tell you how horrific they would have found still being at home at 23. I find that in reality most parents I know wouldn’t/don’t mind their children still being at home in their 20s (some may even enjoy having them around - shock horror!), plus it’s hard living on your own at that age with one wage so a lot of time it’s the only or at least the best option.

For what it’s worth OP I think your parents reaction is really horrible and I can understand why you feel the way you do. I wouldn’t go NC though, just try and accept that is how they feel and try not to be too upset about it. Hope you’re ok.

Well, you need to move out. You can't go NC living in the same place.

Get packing those bags and embrace the world and adulthood.

I would use the extra day for some kind of work so I could afford to leave home, personally. Like an interesting side hustle or something that will teach you valuable skills. It doesn't sound like you're very welcome there and you'll probably have a better relationship once you've left.

I'm curious about why your immediate reaction is NC, rather than to ask why they feel this way, and have a conversation about what the problem is and best way forward might be? Is this a pattern for you - when you push loved ones away in case they reject you? This isn't meant to be patronising - could be something called anxious avoidant attachment.

You just need to be a grown up and move out, they have obviously put up with you for a few years now, you sound quite spoilt. Going NC when it is you that is wrong is a bit extreme, your poor parents

Thanks for your kind sharing.
My point of view still is though, (probably projecting again), that the OP didn't choose to be born into these circumstances.
So her daddy doesn't have to choose to behave like a pig, just because he can (for now).
Controversial, I know.

No I wouldn't go NC - especially seeing as you're still living at home so can't go NC with your parents while living under the same roof. Agree with those saying that they clearly want you to move out. They should have had a proper conversation with you about that rather than taking the passive aggressive route, but it sounds like that's something you all do rather than actually discussing things and problem-solving together. It's not that weird for parents to want their own home back once their kids are full grown, and 23 is a decent age to move out. You'll have much more fun in a flatshare with people your own age. Good luck!

Agree.
I'd happily make myself scarce once day a week in exchange for cheap rent tho

😂😂

No need for all that drama. It's time to move out OP, and let your parents enjoy their own space.

I think your parents might welcome you going NC tbh…

Go nc for ANY reason that makes you feel hurt or uncomfortable

They are being slightly ridiculous, I can only assume that day is when they secretly hold a swingers party or they have form for being overbearing and controlling. That said, you can't really go NC as you appear to live in their house. If I were you I would bite my tongue ans work hard to find somewhere else to live.

Not having anywhere to go on that day...
you could join a nice gym with a spa and have a spa day every other Friday!
Or go to the nearest city to go shopping/ post Vinted parcels/visit museums,
Go and visit a friend for their lunch break near their work,