To think this is too early for a house guest to get up?

[morningbbrew]

My husband's sister and her husband are staying over for the weekend. They don't have children we have two young teens but they are both at friends this weekend.

DBIL has just gone to bed and cheerily announced as he did that he would be going out for a run at 6.00am and would bring a key (they have a spare as they house sit sometimes). Plus he casually mentioned something about making a smoothie beforehand so it actually sounds like he's getting up at more like 5.30am.

Neither DH or I are confrontational and so we both just sort of sat there shocked. But I am just not sure what to say. Our house isn't tiny but equally I am pretty sure all his getting ready etc is going to mean we wake up. And weekend lie ins are rare with two kids and associated activities!

I mean I guess he could be joking but he's not really that kind of person. His wife (DH sister) is normally quite sensible and she didn't seem at all embarrassed about it which is making me worry we are the weird ones for being a bit horrified!

Putting the blender on you don't do until hosts are up.
Expecting someone to not get up at the time their body clock naturally wakes them up is very rude and selfish of hosts though. Unless your front door is very noisy, going for a run is probably quieter than being awake in the house.

Am guessing he’ll be in the shower when he gets back from his run! If it’s in the family/main bathroom.. that would really really piss me off too!

Neither DH or I are confrontational

FFS. Asking someone not to use a blender in your home at Devil's Arsecrack-o'clock because it will wake you up is not confrontational. It's a simple request.

I would be taking that blender to bed with me & hiding it!

I would definitely take the blender to bed with me!

I feel that a lot of mumsnetters don't understand the meaning of the word.

Confrontational is "you're not making a (insert choice of swear word) smoothie at that time of the morning, and don't you dare wake me up"

Non confrontational is "Please can you not use the blender at 5.30 as we are desperately in need of sleep"

I think the key thing here is they occasionally house sit.

This is probably what they do when you’re not there and they probably feel comfortable doing this now because they feel so comfortable in your house.

I do think it’s easy to forget how loud things can be when there’s only two of you in the house.

I really need to know if he does use the blender!! I’m in the camp of the run is fine, the blender is not!

As he's already gone to bed, I think it's fine to leave a note by the kettle saying
" we are having a lie in, sound carries in the house" or something
If his smoothies are akin to a science experiment then I reckon he's brought his nutribullet( or whatever) with him anyway.
I hope you get your lie in

I was going to suggest "accidentally" making a racket on the way to bed to lessen his chance of wanting to get up at 5:30 but I like this idea better.

Take the blender. Put a note under his door saying please do not use kitchen equipment before 9am and do not use the shower until 8am. Then stick the same note where the blender lives. He knows he’s being a dick. Otherwise you’ll not sleep waiting for the noise.

Normally woken by cat about 6, for breakfast, obviously I’m quiet just us.
He sounds selfish

He is unreasonable to make a lot of noise at that time of the morning but you/your DH have now caused this by not saying anything at the time as he probably thinks that you are ok with it

Cant believe two grown adults were so shocked that neither said anything and then moan about it afterwards

You don't need to leave a note but just hide the blender in your room.

He can run all the way to a 24 hour shop to buy himself a smoothie

Is 'move the blender' the new 'cancel the cheque' I wonder?

Good luck op.

the run is fine, I’d say there’s no way your making a smoothie at 5:30 it will wake
everyone up! There’s nothing wrong with saying that, they’re your family so I’m assuming you’re familiar enough to be direct with them, I don’t think it’s rude it’s just a fact? 5:30 is not exactly a common time for everyone to be getting up, especially on a weekend, surely they know that?

No, not only in the case of excessive noise.

Etiquette requires guests to fit in with the rhythm of & the waking/sleeping hours of the household, their mealtimes, etc and not to put their hosts to unnecessary convenience, worry or anxiety.

It means being as helpful & considerate to ones hosts as ones hosts are to one. That way a happy medium is achieved whereby each party goes a little out their way for the other while having their needs also met.

He's staying with friends, not at a hotel and there's a considerable difference.

We hosted a Ukrainian refugee for a year and she got a warehouse job which meant she had to be up and making breakfast at 3:30 or 4:30am most days.

We didn't care, it was 20 mins or so and if we got woken up we just went back to sleep.

For one morning it's nothing.

I don't think the run is remotely fine, he is staying in a family home for free not in a hotel and that is a very anti social hour to be disturbing sleep, as bad as if he were doing so at midnight or 1 or 2 a.m. When I stay with anyone I wait until I hear them moving about before I get up, unless it starts running towards 9 or after, when I think it's fair to act normally. 6 a.m. or worse, 5.30 is ludicrous..

He sounds a fucking dose. Why do some men take these things so seriously, it's very tedious. I'd honestly prefer someone with a bit of a dad bod who was a bit of fun, not joyless getting up to make smoothies and run at 5.30 in the morning. .

That's very understanding of you but if I was woken at that hour, it could take me 2 hours to get back to sleep, if woken at 5.30 or 6 I probably wouldn't at all. So it would really piss me off, even if only one night.

God don’t be such a bloody doormat! Just hide the blender ffs!!!

I cannot understand why you want to be a martyr??

Don't simply “move the blender”, hide it then write a complex 25 stage treasure hunt for him to find the blender, make sure it’s really really hard. By the time he’s completed it it should be gone 8 anyway.