Was I being unkind? Women filming themselves in their pants

[LivingInStrangeTimes]

I was scrolling through tiktok and came across a video of a woman showing a jumpsuit outfit which she is reccomending people buy.

The strange part to me is that the video begins with her standing there in tiny knickers and a bra then she gets dressed into the jumpsuit.

I perhaps shouldn't have said anything at all but left the following comment

"You look lovely. I'm not being unkind but why has it become so normalised to upload videos of ourselves in our underwear? You don't have to expose yourself like that to show the garment x"

Cue a pile on and her getting pissed off because apparently I'm only saying it because of her body type - which had absolutely nothing to do with it for me. We actually look quite similar in the buff!

I'm seeing more and more of these videos and it has become the new normal and done thing on social media for people who want to show clothes, to stand their in their pants beforehand and have you watch them get dressed.

Was I being unreasonable to say what I said and am I unreasonable for thinking its fucking weird and unnecessary?

"I want to show you this dress, but first here's my knickers!"

Edited to add - I mention women specifically because I'm not seeing any of these videos from men.. and nor do I want to 😐

@samanthablues Not liking people in barely any clothes = wanting to be covered up head to toe. Nice argument 😂

Nah.
It's just refusing to give in to mens sleazy pleasures.

Tell me about it.

It's either almost nude or under a burqa with this lot, no in-between.

My friends and family are fine with me putting a bikini picture as Facebook photo, thankfully I have quite a liberal family and I chose open minded people as friends. I don’t choose to put a bikini photo of me because it wouldn’t go down well with my line of work, because it attract creeps and because I believe I look prettier with a formal dress (but that’s just me), if I decided to make a random tik tok video of me in a bikini I would have a problem with people slut shaming me and would tell them to f-uck off.

I don’t choose to put a bikini photo of me because it wouldn’t go down well with my line of work

Why do you think that is?

Again, context is everything.

I don't think anyone has a problem with seeing people in bikinis at the beach, on holiday.

It's very different putting a bikini on specifically to stand in your kitchen and take videos of yourself showing, say, a pair of shoes.

Because I work for quite a conservative company, I may not share their views on many things but I have a mortgage to pay and need to keep the job (for now).

“Sleazy men” will be sleazy men regardless of how many clothes a person is wearing. It’s not about the woman and what she’s wearing. It’s all to do with some men and women’s misogynistic, self-entitled attitudes. You’ve totally missed this point and in fact it’s just not men but it’s women as well just like the OP and yourself so your argument really isn’t as good as you believe it to be. In fact it’s poor. She’s posted a video in her own home for people who want to see the content of her videos which is the “GRWM” trend. She’s not walking around naked in Tescos whilst doing her shopping and to try and claim it’s anything similar is absurd. Context is everything. We shouldn’t indulge prejudices towards women full stop, regardless of who’s perpetrating it.

I think you were being unkind. She was expressing herself in a way she felt comfortable and you were critical of her confidence. It's not a if this young generation are the first to show off their bodies either, it's been done since the year dot. And I've done similar myself.

@ForestForever And you're totally missing the point too.
This is one of those subjects people are very divided on. I think opinions like yours are dangerous, to not acknowledge what effect a barely clothed woman has on men like that. You only have to look at all the sad pathetic men commenting on the almost nude thirst traps on facebook.
We will never agree with each other.

there are 13 year old boys in real life as well.
Should they not be watching ads on tv, on buses, tube/train platforms, tv shows, films, or god forbid going to the beach, all of which feature....30-40 y/o women (and, shock horror EVEN OLDER) in their underwear or swimwear? Have you not seen the dove body ads? I haven't seen teenage boys cower and shield their eyes in disgust at the sight of them...

You are of course entitled to "think its fucking weird and unnecessary?" You can think whatever you like. But there was no reason for you to comment when you could just skip past it. Are YABVU to be shocked that people who disagreed with you then responded to you...that is the internet...

What do you want us to say? That it's shameful if others see we have a female body?

Where do you draw the line? It's not ok for me to post my beach pictures - let's say that's true. Am I still shaming myself if I post one in shorts and a vest? What about a cropped top? Is that ok with you? What length skirt am I allowed to wear?

My original intention was to wear whatever the fuck I like and not take your opinion into account, but I'll humour you by hearing what exactly you're dictating I can wear without bringing shame on myself and humanity.

If she wants to show the world her knickers that’s her business 🤷‍♀️

Well gosh, with an argument as solid as that you’ve completely changed my point of view - not.

“I think opinions like yours are dangerous, to not acknowledge what effect a barely clothed woman has on men like that.“ Are you serious?

Opinions like that are dangerous because it gives men the agency to believe that they have the right to behave in a sordid manner because they couldn’t possibly help or control themselves over a bit of exposed flesh. Get a grip. Men like this are the way they are because they are raised by women like you with your warped views which enable and excuse their misguided way of thinking.

Men absolutely are doing this. I have seen men doing 'get dressed with me' tiktoks and yes they start off in their underwear.

I get so irritated by people who police other peoples social media, it's so unnecessary and uppity. We all have opinions but just like you didn't want to see the lady in her underwear I dot want to see your boring, arrogant comments.

I agree with you OP. It smacks of desperation and makes me scroll by quickly, as I don't really want to see them in their underwear.

@ForestForever You are a terrible human being. You have no idea how I'm raising my kids. It's the opposite of what you're suggesting.

TikTok’s a place where you have to be nice. I see people trying on clothes that in no way flatter their body types and everyone tells them they’re stunning. Or the dieters who week after week lose pounds - but look no different and people gush about how well they’re doing. I

If you dont like it stroll on past.or is it you been jealous.

Maybe to show she isn't wearing anything underneath the jumpsuit, like body shaping underwear- can see what the outfit looks like naturally if she's an influencer.
I don't know. I wouldn't put videos of myself in my underwear but it doesn't bother me that other people do. I wouldn't have said anything or commented.

Probably doesn't have an issue,just doesn't want to see it...

Why do we need to see her knickers if she's promoting a tracksuit?

My sentiments exactly!

It's for attention and engagement. Just scroll on by, that's what I do.