to want to poke my dh in the eye with a shitty stick because of the stupid 'family name' we've inflicted on our ds

[peggotty]

My dh has a family name that all first born sons have to be called (a load of macho bollocks I know). I knew this before we had any children and we had a massive barney about it before dd was born because I hate this name to the core of my being!! We eventually agreed to the compromise that any ds' would be called this name in an official capacity but we would choose a middle name we both liked and that would be his 'everyday' name iykwim. Ds duly arrived 12 weeks ago and I had another go at persuading dh to make the godawful name his middle one instead but he wouldn't budge. Fair enough, I thought at the time, I did agree to the compromise. Only now I'm starting to realise that people will think I actually wanted to call him this name and already at the docs he has had this name called out in the waiting room. I know I'm being ridiculous in some ways and I suppose most people wouldn't bat an eyelid maybe think 'weird name' and forget about it, but I'm already starting to worry about his first day at school etc if it's called out in class and sticks! I suppose it goes a bit deeper than just the name, I feel a bit aggrieved that I had to 'give in' on something I felt so strongly about, but so did DH. WHY could he not have agreed to it being a middle name instead!!!!

yes but however long it has gone back, it is pointless if no-one is using the name. It is not his name if no-one is using it

mind you having thought about it, you know, I don't give a monkeys

what about this - say his name is Madscot Peter Bifflebottom

start writing his name down every single time as M. Peter Bifflebottom - it's perfectly acceptable

you don't need to write Madscot anywhere, ever

no-one needs to know

You're all vultures!!

Oh I bloody knew someone would come along and say 'what's wrong with it?'. Hammy hammy!! I had a hamster called hammy! I hate it hate it!! God, this is cathartic!

i don't think Hamilton is that bad actually.

could he be Hal for short?

oh fgs

Hamilton is okay

Hamilton? Is that all? Crikey, I felt sure you were going to say Dobharcu or Truinnean or something!

I quite like it.

at the risk of offending anyone other than OP, who has a child called Hamilton. YANBU.

my idea is still good anyway

Cappuccino - yes! Noone uses it it seems so pointless I agree but dh couldn't see this!

He doesn't have to be Hammy

You can at least assert some authority over that bit

Hamilton - cool name

Hammy - name you give to a pet rodent

See? easy!

I have had exactly the same experience. Days before DS was born, FIL showed me the family tree and pointed out all the boys called the unusual family name since 1715! Hmm, no pressure from there then.

I also tried suggesting using the family name as a middle name, but my DH wasn't keen. He really loves his name. He says that everyone remembers who he is because there is only one of him (other than his dad, his grandad, his great grandad etc). People always ask him about his name and he has to spell it.

First of all we called our DS "Baby Unusual Family Name", but that was a bit of a mouthfull and also it was just plain weird for me calling my son the same name as my husband. When he was about 8 weeks, my friend pointed out that actually we rarely called him anything, and usually just refered to him as "the baby".

So eventually I got my head round what worked for us. Officially, his family name is his first name and then he has a common middle name as well. I call him by a nick name that I love. In the beginning at baby groups people would ask me his name and I would go through the whole "well he has this family name but it's too weird etc, so I call him XXX". Now I don't bother and just say the nick name. And because I'm his mum and most people are introduced to him through me, he is now known as his nickname. I sometimes feel a bit sad for my DH who loves his name, but he says he doesn't mind too much. One day, my DS can decide for himself what he wants to be called.

Oh boo! Hamilton isn't that bad at all - went to school with a boy called Hammy - wonder if they're one in the same?!

I'm still quite taken with Alouicious Gruntbuttock.

Anyway, 'Hamilton' is crying, I better go and see to him.

Hamilton is a nice name! Unusual too so won't be one of 20 in the same class

agree with Sheikh

and MY IDEA IS STILL GOOD

c'mon now give us a clue, what's the first letter?

It's not that bad pegotty, I was expecting something much worse. Hammy's not great though

I like th idea os H. Algernon Fforbes-Jenkins or whatever you name is

It will make him all mysterious later in life.

Hamilton not that bad as Scots names and names in general go. It could be worse, he could be called, er Kirkcaldy or Glasgow!
I knew a man called Hammy, he and his wife used to work in a hotel.

I quite like Hamilton but although YANBU, I wouldn't worry about your underlying concern that people will call him that. I am always known by my middle name, so is my mother, so is my daughter. It's fine. Official people do call out the first name first but I usually print my middle name and underline it in forms so people know that is what I'm known by. And at school people soon forget all about the other name.

As long as his middle name isn't Academicals I don't think you've got anything to worry about apart from having a bossy DH.

'nother one who quite likes it here.

Then again, none of us were actually forced into giving it to our offspring.

It could be owrse, he could be Febreeze Shaquille O'Neill

Or Stella Artois

Or Harley Davidson