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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to want to poke my dh in the eye with a shitty stick because of the stupid 'family name' we've inflicted on our ds

194 replies

peggotty · 17/04/2008 09:46

My dh has a family name that all first born sons have to be called (a load of macho bollocks I know). I knew this before we had any children and we had a massive barney about it before dd was born because I hate this name to the core of my being!! We eventually agreed to the compromise that any ds' would be called this name in an official capacity but we would choose a middle name we both liked and that would be his 'everyday' name iykwim. Ds duly arrived 12 weeks ago and I had another go at persuading dh to make the godawful name his middle one instead but he wouldn't budge. Fair enough, I thought at the time, I did agree to the compromise. Only now I'm starting to realise that people will think I actually wanted to call him this name and already at the docs he has had this name called out in the waiting room. I know I'm being ridiculous in some ways and I suppose most people wouldn't bat an eyelid maybe think 'weird name' and forget about it, but I'm already starting to worry about his first day at school etc if it's called out in class and sticks! I suppose it goes a bit deeper than just the name, I feel a bit aggrieved that I had to 'give in' on something I felt so strongly about, but so did DH. WHY could he not have agreed to it being a middle name instead!!!!

OP posts:
Cappuccino · 17/04/2008 09:56

give us the name

give us the name

Cappuccino · 17/04/2008 09:56

give us the name

give us the name

LazyLinePainterJane · 17/04/2008 09:57

hindsight is marvellous.

You should not have given in. This "tradition" thing is bullshit IMO, imagine how your children will feel having to use this name and will feel as if you expect them to because you did the same thing.

What is the name.

peggotty · 17/04/2008 09:57

Haha aristos or greek!!! No, just bloody-minded scot. Apparently this name thing has gone on in his family for generations, as far back as anyone can remember blah blah so I was sort of emotionally blackmailed into giving in to it!

OP posts:
NotDoingTheHousework · 17/04/2008 09:57

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sophiewd · 17/04/2008 09:57

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease tell us the name. My families names are lovely if very holy and Catholic, think Jesus' parents.

hecate · 17/04/2008 09:58

ok, just tell us what letter it starts with. If we guess it, you have to confirm?

SheikYerbouti · 17/04/2008 09:59

I rewckon it's Menzies

SSSandy2 · 17/04/2008 09:59

That's curious hecate, bit eccentric! In an odd way I quite like them all being named Elijah and called Bob!

How awful is this first name then really? My dad has never been called by his first name (James) for some reason but always by his second.

Is dh and his family going to go along with naming him X and yet calling him Y or is ds going to be called Y at school and by you, yet X by dh's family? - Because that I'd find a bit weird for him

seeker · 17/04/2008 09:59

Actually, I've just realized that my ds has a ridiculous 3rd name because it was my dead father's name. I never thought of it as ridiculous because it was my Dad!

So he has a first name because of his granddad, a sensible middle name and a seriously ridiculous third name after a dead person.

FromGirders · 17/04/2008 09:59

Has to be Farquhar, doesn't it?

hecate · 17/04/2008 09:59

Aonghasan?

peggotty · 17/04/2008 10:00

Oh bloody hell it's not Menzies! But only marginally better that that. I knew I would cave in - ok, it's Hamilton. His dad gets called Hammy. That's a rodent.

OP posts:
BubbaAndBump · 17/04/2008 10:00

We won't judge (!), we won't be offended - we just NEED to know the name so that we can sympathise with you properly....

NotDoingTheHousework · 17/04/2008 10:00

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CrushWithEyeliner · 17/04/2008 10:00

is it Mac - I really don't like that name fwiw

SheikYerbouti · 17/04/2008 10:00

I quite like Hamilton, actually

hecate · 17/04/2008 10:01

I know, SSS - they're a very odd lot.

Vulgar · 17/04/2008 10:01

yanbu. I would be very upset too after all choosing a name is an important part of becoming a parent.

Don't really have any advice tho' apart from making things clear at school and doctors. All unofficial things such as clubs should hopefully be Ok to register as the middle name.

trefusis · 17/04/2008 10:01

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BubbaAndBump · 17/04/2008 10:01

Ooh NotDOing, that has a good ring to it - gruntbuttock slightly better though. Do you think my DH will agree to it for our bump? lol

SheikYerbouti · 17/04/2008 10:01

See, It could be worse

He could be Menzies and then he'd be called Ming for the rest of his life

NotDoingTheHousework · 17/04/2008 10:01

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CrushWithEyeliner · 17/04/2008 10:02

oh hamilton - I quite like it - but that doesn't matter a dot. You MUST love the name of your son ffs, change it

hatrick · 17/04/2008 10:02

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