Daughter refusing to speak normally

[Maryahadaballtoday]

I’m at my bloody wits end with my child and I’m very close to telling her so.

I have one child (daughter she’s eight) she is my only child as a few years ago I had my tubes tied neither me or partner wanted another daughter - perfectly fine with just one and she has plenty of cousins and friends to spend time with. I

Its worth noting before I go on that my child is not neurodivergent nor is she from a broken home. Me and her dad have been together twelve years. We have never broken up nor divorced either, partly because we’ve never been married. So there’s really no need for her to be doing what she does.

Lately she has been reverting back to baby speech - saying things like chippies or icky, the worst is bobo when she wants her water bottle and it’s grinding my gears to the maximum. It’s gotten so bad that my partner will flat out ignore her.

Earlier on today she had a full on temper tantrum and kept screaming “icky icky icky” over ice cream spilling on her fingers while we were out. When I pulled her up on to her feet and sternly told her she was on thin ice she reverted back to baby speech “I no wike you” was among my top five favourites.

AIBU to ignore her like my partner is doing? Is this a phase she’ll grow out of? I’m dreading sending her back to school the week after next because her baby talk has got so bad none of her friends have wanted to spend time all summer

I really don’t need the shaming mum parade, I’d like a hand hold and for someone to tell me their kid has also been driving them beserk too

although I know I’m likely to be flamed - Mumsnet seems to be that way

What is the situation with her friends, you briefly mentioned they don’t want to spend time with her any more because of this, how exactly has that come about? Have they/their parents openly declined invitations to socialise purely because of the baby voice thing? Is she aware of this? Is she not bothered?

When I was around that age I used to talk in an American accent (there are some cringey old vhs tapes that I hope never see light of day again!) but it was just a bit of fun, and if my mum told me my friends didn’t want to see me any more because of this I would’ve stopped straight away.

@BippityBopper Nobody has diagnosed anybody. Read my posts again. I said “it sounds like” & I made it very clear that my ONLY reason for saying so, was that my autistic child does the exact same behaviour.
Even if I had ‘diagnosed’ I’d say what is far worse, is all the posters on here, telling OP how she should punish this child who very well could be autistic. It’s disgusting

Is anybody,ever " typical"
Its madness!
The OP sounds like a sane , rational, boudaried person and the daughter is being rather annoying. Nobody has a syndrome here. The OP says so.
Some good advice re ignore and praise age appropriate conversations.
Hang on in there OP.

Oh gosh it's almost certainly an annoying phase but I would totally call her bluff

"oh it's 6pm bedtime for baby girl"

"no juice for babies, only water"

"no sweets for babies"

no tv baby, it's bad for you whilst you're so little. Here's a book

and repeat with everything fun

my dd is ND and did this.

I treated it exactly like others here have advised.

Ignored it, or told her that i don't speak baby speak, and if she wants to talk to me, she can ask me properly.. then stuck to my guns.

She soon stopped it.

It sounds annoying and probably a way to get attention. At first my advice was going to be not to make a big deal of it. Just casually say that she needs to speak in her normal voice for you to understand her.

However, it seems as though something potentially serious is going on with her. Why has she seen three psychiatrists?

Thanks, I’m so drained, she’s been at it all damn day and I’m just hiding in the spare room crying with a cup of tea and an episode of Bridgerton

i feel proper stupid for crying over it

i would not let it upset me that much. Fine, let her know you’re not impressed, but without getting irate or letting her know it upsets you. If her teacher won’t put up with it and her friends are getting sick of it, she might realise it’s not doing her any favours very soon.

My child isn’t your child though. I have two autistic nephews and BOTH of them hate baby talking - they’re very straight forwards in thinking

even they know that my daughters baby talking is getting bloody stupid

I'm saying that your DD very much is neurodivergent

You know everyone can read exactly what you wrote?

And? Your daughter isn’t your nephews 🤷🏼‍♀️
I know several autistic kids who baby talk, it’s one of the most common signs between ages 7-12

We’ve had a bit of this over this summer (bundled with a whole heap of bedtime anxiety!) Same age, going into yr5 and I think is worried about the change and needing to be ‘grown up’.
We’ve flat out ignored it/repeated over and over that we don’t understand when she speaks like that. It’s mostly stopped now and she’s never done it with other people.
Sleep is still a PITA!

oh don't be ridiculous, autism isn't a get out of jail free card for normal childish misbehaviour. Sometimes the behaviour is just them being naughty/childish/silly and needs addressing as such.

Please don’t over think it.
It’s probably a phase. She’s probably bored, so winding you up for some entertainment.

Not long to go now until she’s back at school.

Nice cropping out of the context in which I said that! 🤣 You know everyone can read what I wrote, right?!

Did you mean to be so rude?
How childish.

It sounds like she is attention seeking. Maybe she feels like she got more attention and cuddles etc from you when she was a baby? I would ignore her but spend quality time with her, maybe doing some things feel grown up like cooking something together "it's nice that you're old enough to do things like this with me now" etc.
Has anything changed in her life recently? Could she be acting like a baby because she feels like that time in her life was safer?
It might be just the way you've written it but it does sound like you're quite critical of your DD, do you actually like spending time with her?

Another one who doesn't understand why this is such a huge deal? All mine go through cycles of talking weird (baby talk, or American youtuber, or some other nonsense they've picked up at school and don't even know where it's come from!)

Love the kid you've got, not the one you wish you had etc (even if the one you've got is kinda annoying 🤣)

Does she get a lot of positive attention from
you, and time spent together? You speak about her quite contemptuously, I wonder whether this is what gets her attention from you so she is persisting with it.

As others have said above, in the absence of further info about the psychiatrists, it sounds typical of a phase that a lot of children go through at this age. She’s role playing, and maybe mulling over how she feels about growing up. I get that it’s annoying but it’s not that unusual and she’s not a mini-adult so shouldn’t be expected to behave as such.

@Foxxo Reported

This sounds incredibly irritating.

I would go with the previous suggestions to treat her like a baby then, so treats, baby friendly food and milk only ‘babies aren’t allowed chocolate’. No screens, no bike, no scooter, no trampoline park or any of the other things that big girls get to do…

No other context is needed, you never said sounds like at all.

She can see she's getting a reaction from you and that may be her (unconscious) motivation. If you can be bright and breezy and not react at all, that might be enough for her to realise she won't get attention this way.

But (and it's a huge but) something serious must be going on if she has seen 3 psychiatrists. So the baby talk may be the tip of the iceberg. What was the reason she was referred for psychiatric care?